


The Aftermath

by Music118



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: AU, Asmodeus Being an Asshole (Shadowhunter Chronicles), Boys In Love, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt Alec Lightwood, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Magnus Bane Is A Freewheeling Bisexual, Malec, Minor Violence, Past Abuse, Protective Alec Lightwood, Protective Isabelle Lightwood, Sequel, Supportive Jace Wayland, fighter!alec, fighter!magnus, they deserve better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:54:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 79,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21754834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Music118/pseuds/Music118
Summary: *this is a sequel to "something to fight for* so read that first!!!Alec used to be the best fighter in New Yorkthe events of florida changed the fight game for magnus and alec, suddenly their lives where on display to the whole world. when they return home they are left to face the suddenly very real consequences of their actions. Alec watches his career that he has worked his whole life for disappear before his eyes, magnus finds out that his dad is more dangerus then either of them could have ever imagne. When people from their past find their way back into the present and threaten to destroy the life they have started to create, will they be able to face their mistakes of the past or will they fall victim to it instead?Im horrible at summarys but basically its just what happends after my last story, lots of drama and angst and fluff! The fight world is not the most open minded community in the world so something like this would have a lot of different reactions. I promise this is better then It sounds so please read!! You wont regret it
Relationships: Clary Fray/Jace Wayland, Magnus Bane & Alec Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 40
Kudos: 60





	1. Chapter 1

hey guys!!! the sequel is here!! like before I will be posting this story once a week, normal on either Thursdays or Fridays with the first part going up tomorrow since I am going to be on a plane all day Thursday!! I hope you guys love this sequel as much as I do!!  
buckle up, its going to be a wild ride


	2. ONE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> like I said before this is getting posted today because I am going to be on a plane all day tomorrow! here is the first chapter of the sequel, I hope you guys like it!!!

Alec used to be the best fighter in new York city

Now, he had no idea what he was. 

It was two weeks before he walked back into the gym.

After the got back from Florida everything had happened so fast. Soon they were surrounded by moving boxes in magnus apartment, the place they had once lived together and were packing up his old life only to move it to alecs new one. it was weird being back in that space, in someways it felt like he had never left. there had been so much to do, so much to think about that he had forgotten about what had happened. That was until be went on his phone. since the fight community have decided to make it their mission to let him know what they thought of him every minute of the day there was no shortage of backlash. Magnus had begged him to just delete it but he couldentt, is that really how people thought of him now? He dident let it hurt hime, instead He felt something like rage every time someone called him this or that, how dare they talk about something they had idea about. Once alec had made the choice in the ring to kiss magnus in front of everyone, he had not gone back. He had spent years, more so the past few weeks thinking that he may never get the chance to do something as mundane as hold his hand and if other people did not like it then they could go screw themselves. he had got so caught up in the white noise of his new life that he had forgotten about the gym, which brings him to today. It was finally gym day. The day he was going to show magnus the gym, his class, he got to show him his home

“you ready?” alec says. they are standing outside his beautiful gym, He was practically vibrating beside him with anticipation. H wanted magnus to feel at home here too, wanted him to feel the same welcomed feeling that alec did when he went to the gym, but he knew it would be a while before magnus felt that. Alec needed to remind himself that magnus had never been welcomed in the gym before, that he had been fighting and training out of rival gym his whole life and was now walking into enemy territory begging them not to shoot. 

Magnus nodded with anxiety alec could practically feel roll off of him. he grabbed magnus hand gently, trying to reassure him that it was okay

“together” he said. Magnus nodded once more before they walked in  
the second he step through the door he felt all the stress, fear and anxiety all disappear. he was home. He looked to the bags all hanging in a neat row, to the towel that always sat in the corner, to the photos on the wall that showed the story of his life. It was all the same and always would be. he relaxed his shoulders, closing his eyes to just feel the familiars of it all. He only opened them when he felt magnus grip his hand tighter. He looked and saw the wonder on magnus face change into something more like uncertainty, alec followed his gaze to the front desk where none other than Lydia was sitting staring at them like they have 12 eyes. 

“hey Lyd, long time no see” she looked at him with something he couldn’t recognize, but knew was far away from the wishful longing he used to see in her eyes. Her gaze got colder when she turned to magnus, more so the hand that was holding alecs.

“alec” she said before going back to her work. Alec was not going to let this bother him, not today, not when he was finally getting to show magnus this space that meant the most to him 

“don’t worry about it” he said quietly to magnus as they continued into the gym. He smiled when he saw the wide-open windows, shinning natural light into the open space of matts where people were slowly getting ready for a pads class. Alec ignored the way they all stopped to look at them as they passed. He wanted magnus to love the space as much as he did, and he intended on showing him the best things about it. he showed him the locker room where he could keep his stuff, the weight room that was always open, the sauna in the back that contained a treadmill on it for cutting weight, he showed him all the little ins and outs, told him things about certain pieces of art or photos that he was proud of. It was like a little kid showing their class their show and tell project, lastly, he showed magnus the office that alec had, not that he ever used it as such. It was up in a lofty part of the building, up a set of stairs away from everyone else and inside instead of a desk or work station there was a couch with clothes strewn around it, a tv and a mini fridge in the corner. Magnus looked at alec with suspicions 

“alright so it’s not really an office,” he walked over to pick up the clothes he must have forgotten to move before he left. “the truth is” he sat down, magnus following him “is that after we, we broke up I didn’t know what to do” he felt magnus hand tighten around his “ I couldn’t stand to be at my apartment sober, so instead of drinking myself into a coma I started sleeping here, started training until I couldn’t move. after a while I started going home but every now and then I still stay here” he looked around the little room that had been his safe place, a safe place he was now sharing with magnus. They didn’t talk about the past as much as they should, It was weird to let a little bit of It slip out “no one is allowed up here other than my family, and that means you” magnus looked at him with such love he thought he would drown in it

“thank you” is all he said, alec knew It meant more than that. It was weird to sit here with magnus, in a space where he had screamed and cried over the fact that he thought he would never see him again . Alec leaned in for a quick kiss before pulling away with a smirk

“I happen to teach a pads class in ten minutes, care to join?” magnus leaned in to reconnect their lips 

“you’re on”

One of the reasons alec has missed the gym was he missed his classes. Along with training and some private lessons here and there he had started to pick up some of the group classes as, well since the staff basically included his family, he didn’t have a choice in the matter. His favorite class to teach was differently the advanced pads class he had recently started to take over, mostly because he didn’t really have to teach all that much and got to hit pads instead since it was an advanced fighter class. When he walked out on the floor in front of the class, he suddenly felt exposed, all of them looking at him as if he owes them an explanation. He knew most of them, had trained and fought with them, but there were some people he didn’t know, those were the ones looking at him with hate

“alright guys as you know I have been away at fights in Florida for the past month, but I’m glad to be back,” he stood straight with his head held high. he noticed that magnus was sheepish standing to the side of the matts as if he didn’t know what to do, alecs expression immediately softened upon seeing it

“as you may have heard we are lucky enough to have Magnus Bane joining us from now on” he motioned for magnus to move onto the mat, which he did with flourish, all of his shyness suddenly gone now that everyone’s attention was on him 

“its me who is lucky to get to train at such a well-kept gym” a couple people chuckled at that but alec realized most of them where looking at magnus as if he were a piece of meat. There was no part of him that fight into the monochromatic gym, not the black crop top he wore or the light blue Thai shorts, alec realized never wanted him to blend in 

“what, are we just supposed to ignore the fact that he’s Al Banes son and probably feeding him everything we do all because your sleeping with him?” some guy alec didn’t know very well said. The group nodded along, some looked shocked. magnus looked at alec as if he didn’t know what to say. Alec straighten his back 

“magnus is one of us now. Ill comments or words against him will not be tolerated from his point out ” his voice was loud, commanding. This stopped now “and anyone who has a problem with that can deal with me” he saw some people nod their heads and others mumble things under their breath. He knew this would not the end of it, but he knew it would only get worse if he let people think It bothered him. “now that that is taken care of, everyone partner up and gear up”  
He moved over to where magnus was standing, giving him a smile that was so different from the look he had just given the class. 

“your up since I cant hit” he gave him an innocent smile while magnus nodded, going over to grab his gear

“you sure about this?” magnus said while putting his gloves on, alec already had his pads on, going over to set the timer on the wall 

“positive” he tuned towards the class to address them “alright guys, let’s do…. Five, four-minute rounds, with sprints in-between” he turned towards the guy who had spoken up earlier “you can blame your friend over there for that” the timer went off and alec tuned towards magnus with a wicked smirk. 

“alright, nice and easy” he realized he had not hit pads with magnus since they were teenagers, and even then, it had only been a couple times. For as much as he had fought with and watched magnus train he really didn’t know how he trained. Magnus threw the first couple punches light, trying to get used to alecs movement, he threw some kicks, to the legs, alec still couldn’t take any shots to the body from his ribs, which maguns knew so he didn’t even put on a belly pad. The first round of pads is always slow but they slowly started to learn each other’s movement, that is until the first round ended

“so what are these sprints everyone seems so excited about?” magnus was hardly even out of breath after the first round

“nothing hard, fifty kicks in thirty seconds, twenty round knees, ten combos, ten push-ups” he said it as casual as he possibly could, enjoying the way magnus eyes got wide

“right now?” he looked around at all the other fighters struggling through their sprints

“about five seconds ago actually” alec gave him a challenging look, magnus matched it while starting to kick. Sprints where seriously horrible, alec only making them do them because he was mad at the guy who spoke, and the fact that alec couldn’t actually do pad work just yet because of his injured side meant he dident have to do them. sometimes he loved being incharge. Magnus didn’t stop kicking until all fifty were done, making sure to kick light on the side that will still from the fight. When they were he stoof infront of him trying to steady his breathing 

“that all you got?”

“kness” alec said with laughter in his voice. Magnus grumbled as he moved over to the bag since he couldn’t knee alec. But still even after the knees magnus walked over with swagger, maybe his cardio was slightly better than alec thought it was. 

“lets go hook, round, hook cross round” magnus eyes were still wide but he nodded his head determinedly and hit the first punch. It was a long and hard combo that was usally the kind of thing you did when you were fighting, but alec did it on purpose, he wanted to see what magnus could really do. When he was done magnus stood straight, his held high. alec knew he didn’t want anyone else to see that he was tired, he wanted everyone to think he was stronger then maybe he was. 

“alright thirty second break then start again” magnus gave him a look that could kill, alec just laughed It off. Once they really got into it he discovered how much fun it was to hit with magnus, to push him to limits and see how far he could go. They played off each other, magnus countering whatever alec threw, throwing a shot of his own when alec put his hands down. It was fun, more fun than he had had hitting pads in a long time. He was sad when it was finally over. Magnus seemed a little less sad when then final bell went. Alec put his pads down and instructed the class to switch partners, magnus standing off to the side trying to catch his breath 

“you can just do some bag work or something while they finish this off” magnus, who could never back down from a challenge nodded his head, hair falling into his face . he had never really seen magnus train before, seen how the sweat soaked through his shirt making it stick to his chest, the way his eyes got dark. Alec wanted nothing more then to push him up against the closet wall and kiss him senseless, but he figured that might be unprofessional at the moment  
Alec moved to the front of the class to watch the rest of the group hit, keeping an eye on the new guy who had a mouth on him. alec knew there would be some kickback from everything that had happened, it was impossible for there not to be but he didn’t think there would be in his own gym.   
They finished off the rounds quickly, alec not really paying that much attention to what was going on, but soon the class was lined up in front of him

“nice guys, you all looked awesome” he bowed them out then walked over to where magnus was standing.

“how was that?” he said, placing a hand on his shoulder, magnus leaned his head on it now that no one was watching, everyone back to their own lives

“awesome” he said out of breath. Alec laughed while going to pick up his bags, whipping them down with dis-infected first 

“you did great” he looked at magnus leg once he got up, remembering that it was not 100% “how is your leg holding up?” magnus took his gloves off

“sore” he didn’t like to talk about it. as matter a fact after the one night in Florida neither of them had really talked about it again, about the fight and what had happened. Alec thinks that they were both too scared, like it was too much to think about. The threat of magnus dad had been one they had both had on their mind for weeks, the only positive being that Al had no idea where alec lived, but it would not be hard for him to find out. He was involved in some pretty shady business from what magnus had told him, had some pretty scary contacts, something else they didn’t talk about very much. Things had happened so fast that there was no time to talk or take things slow, they were given a situation where they had only two choices and they had chose each other. Alec knew that they should talk about it, that these are real things they are going to have to discuss but it was too hard, to fresh. He knew magnus was afraid but didn’t want to show it, he saw the way we had walked on egg shells around him for days after the fight. It wasn’t as easy as winning or losing the fight, the fight he was realizing had not even started yet.   
He packed up his gear, and walked back up to the office at the top with magnus following closely behind, the second they were alone again magnus fell onto the bed, lying face down 

“I need to work out more” he mumbled. Alec sat down beside him, running a hand up and down his back. “that was harder than it should have been” he rolled over so he was laying on his back looking at him with a smile 

“what?” alec said, thinking that maybe his hair was out of place or his shirt was on backwards or something, magnus just kept smiling, taking longer to answer, enjoying having all   
the time In the world

“nothing alexander, nothing at all” alec grabbed magnus hand to place a kiss on his knuckles They had a lot to talk about, but somehow, he had a feeling they would be able to make it. magnus sat up so that he was facing alec like he suddenly remembered some important thing he needed to say

“how do I make these people not want to kill me?” alec laughed again, something he found himself doing a lot more these days. He wasn’t wrong, they guys at this gym looked at magnus like they were ready to strike at any time, alec knew it would be awhile before he would let him train by himself 

“sadly, I don’t think you can do anything about that, not yet anyways” magnus didn’t like that answer 

“maybe I can charm them with my good looks” he shot his eye brows up suggestively

“that may just make it worse” the fight world was not none for being the most open-minded groups in the world, it was something that made alecs hands sweat when he let himself think about it, which is maybe why they didn’t talk about it, because neither knew how. “just be yourself, they will learn to love you” it was going to be a long road, but alec had hope. magnus leaned in, alec happy to meet him half way to place their lips together. 

“alec” someone shouted from down stairs. He sighed 

“can I ignore it, would that be bad?” he said against his lips casing magnus to laugh

“it would be perfectly acceptable” he smiled, deepening the kiss ever so slightly. He didn’t want to ever leave 

“alec, I think you need to come down here” the voice said again, closer this time. Because he didn’t want who ever it was to barge in and find them making out on the bed, he slowly got up. 

“someone better be dying” he mumbles to magnus grumpily. Magnus followed him up, placing one last kiss 

“don’t be long” alec smiled and went to the door.

At the bottom of the stairs a guy named jay stood, he looked unsure 

“what is it?” he slowly walked down the stairs, suddenly not entirely sure he wanted to know who it was. when he rounded to corner to the front desk, he stopped. Images of a summer night a life time ago filled his mind, of a night club and people to drunk to remember their names, of a drunken mistake that almost killed him. standing in the entry way to the gym was none other then Jonatha

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan is back!! what did you guys think? its a bit of a smaller chapter as I have been running around trying to get ready for my trip, but I hope you liked it!!!! leave your comments and kudos like always!!


	3. THREE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys!! sorry for the weird update times im currently in a different time zone then normal so its messing me up!!! I hope you like this chapter as much as I do, thank you so much for reading this!!

For a second he saw red before reminding himself that he had no idea what had happened that night, had no idea what had truly happen, how drunk Jonathan was, his second thought was that Jonathan fought for Al. He took a deep breath before walking towards him

“Jonathan” he said across the room, making him look up in surprise. He hadn’t changed much since the last time alec had seen him, maybe leaned out but other then that he looked   
exactly like the person he used to call his best friend. He smiled at him, coming to give him a hug. alec awkwardly hugged back 

“alec!! Its been forever man” he moved away, alec crossed his arms in front his chest not really knowing what else to do with them. it was no coincidence that he had shown up here the first day he had been back at the gym in weeks. 

“it has been, what brings you all the way over here?” he tried for the friendliest voice he could muster, but every time he looked at him all he could think was why he was there

“I heard about what happened in Florida, you guys are the biggest thing since….forever!! I just wanted to check in buddy, see how you guys are doing, I assume magnus is here too   
yeah?” it all seemed wrong, the timing to perfect.

“why are you really here jon? I haven’t heard from you in years” he avoid magnus, wanting to keep him as far away from this until he knew what was going on., suddenly feeling protective. Jonathan sighed and looked at the ground

“I figured you might need a friend, I imagine not many people are impressed after what happened,” alec had known him for a long time, he knew there was more so he waited. “…and I came to tell you and I quote “watch your back” and there it was. alec looked around him, making sure no one else was imminently around them

“wonder who told you that” he said under his breath, for a moment they just stared at each other, sizing each other up. he looked older, but he was still him. just as alec was about to say something he heard the office door open, he wanted to run. Never in his life had he wanted to make a situation disappear as much as he wanted this too. But like always fate could not be so nice. He turned to see magnus standing in the main room watching them, his face was pale. Alec almost wanted to laugh at the situation, however awful it was for him he knew it must have been worse for magnus. He motioned him over, too late now to pretend that he wasn’t there. Slowly, very slowly magnus walked over to them. when he turned around he saw Jonathan run his eyes over magnus slowly, a grin making its way to his face 

“ah there you are, been a while magnus” magnus stood slightly behind alec, he noticed that he was fidgeting with his jacket. 

“Jonathan” he said shortly, he was looking at the ground. 

“your dads been looking for you, he’s worried” it was the biggest load of shit alec had ever heard. Al was not worried about magnus, if anything he was worried because he didn’t know his exact location to murder him. He heard magnus scoff from beside him 

“Im sure” he said. Magnus crossed his arms “is that all you came here to say?” Jonathan looked at alec slowly, a calculated look on his face before looking back to magnus 

“with the current company, yes” he licked his lips. Alec wanted to punch him, what the hell was he doing? “but magnus we should really talk, call me” without missing a beat magnus grabbed alecs hand tightly, making a stand

“I have nothing to say to you” no one moved for a few seconds, magnus and Jonathan seeming to have some internal conversation that alec could not understand, but before he could think about it magnus dropped his hand and walked away, leaving the situation entirely. Alec stood his ground, not totally sure what has just happened or why they were acting so criptic but if magnus was upset then that was enough

“seems like that’s your que to get out” he walked him towards the door, not wanting him anywhere near the gym or magnus

“be careful alec, you don’t know who your playing with,” he turned around to leave “oh and you should ask your boyfriend what happened after you left that night, its truly a wonderful story” with that he turned around and left. 

Alec didn’t know what to think about that. after he left. He already knew what happened after didn’t he? He played the words over again in his mind as he walked back to the office at the top of the gym. He decided he didn’t need to know, not now that they were trying to figure things out still, besides they had bigger things to talk about. Magnus dad for one. Magnus was sitting on the bed waiting for him when he got there, his head down

“are you okay?” alec asked, still standing at the door

“ im fine alexander, what did he want?” magnus stood up to match him, grabbing his bag on the way up . alec wanted to ask him, about what Jonathan had said, about his dad, he wanted to say so many things but when he saw the look in magnus eyes he just couldn’t say them. instead he walked closer and kissed him

“nothing, ready to go?” he deiced he could ask him later. 

They left the gym quickly, both wanting to go back to their apartment, the safe place where no one could find them. 

“we should have people over tonight” magnus said out of the blue about half way home. “forget about Jonathan and just relax for a night” Alec didn’t really want to, especially with jonathans warning playing through his mind but distraction could be fun

“yeah, sure I can call izzy and jace” he reached for his phone but magnus grabbed it before he could continue “hey—”

“alec you know I love your family, but I meant more along the lines of real people, my people” magnus looked almost desperate, alec understood. Magnus had basically left his entire life behind in Brooklyn including his friends and it had been at least a month since he had seen them. they had both been under so much stress recently that they deserved a fun night. The rest could wait

“alright, I’m in” magnus smile was bright, his mind already planning a thousand different things. He kissed his check before pulling out his own phone, sending a text that he’s sure went to more than just a couple people 

That’s how alec found himself pushing magnus around in a cart at the closers grocery store while he was told what to buy

“and why are you in the cart again?” he said while reaching to grab a bag of chips from the shelf. Magnus was checking things off of an impromptu list 

“because I am supervising!” alec would never admit how endearing he looked sitting in the cart wearing a sweater and boots. He shook his head fondly before beginning to push again. he had found out long ago not to question magnus when it came to things like parties, even last-minute ones like this. he somehow always made it work perfectly. Although the amount of food alec was instructed to put in the cart made him nervous

“you do realize we live in a very small loft right?” he picked up some very expensive looking meat . “and that we are broke” magnus laughed, motioning him with his hand to stop worrying 

“it will be fine alexander, simon is coming”. Simon. His heart ached at the name. he had lost touch with him along with everyone else he had held dear after he and magnus broke up, he wished he had stayed in contact with him. the three of them used to party outside of the city all the time, they were the perfect recipe for disaster but alec missed him more then he realized. Suddenly his growing anxiety got bigger. What if he hated him? as if magnus could read his mind he placed a hand over his “he talks about you all the time Alec, it will be okay” Alec gave him a reassuring smile before finishing their shopping 

When they got home magnus immediately got to work trying to make their small apartment into a space that could host a party. It was the first time anyone outside of alecs family would see his home, the place where he both fell apart and put himself back together in. the place they now called theirs. He was excited to taste a little bit of his old life. before he knew it he was putting plates of food around the tables, making sure the drinks they had boughten earlier where cold, it was his job to make sure everything was perfect while magnus got changed, which alec thought he was very underqualified for. He ended up sitting on a bar stool looking through his Instagram, trying to waste time. 

“being productive, are we?” magnus says from the loft above him, alec looks up to defend himself but his words die in his throat. Magnus looks stunning, 

“wow” is all he can say. He looks him up and down, the baby blue dress shirt he wore hugged his body tightly, the necklaces hanging from his neck only pointing out the fact that only two of the buttons where done up, eye liner making his eyes look wild. It was all perfect. It had been a while since he saw magnus look like this, it had been so crazy recently that he had lived in hoodies and ripped jeans but this is something more. this was—wow

“like what you see?” magnus moved towards him so that he is standing between his legs, wrapping his arms around his neck. Alec moved his hands to his sides, careful not to disturb the fabric there

“your beautiful” he says into the heartbeat of air between their lips. Magnus eyes brighten right before their lips touch in a kiss that was so filled with love he wanted to drown in it, passionate enough he felt light headed. he felt magnus run his hands through his hair, pulling him in as if they could somehow get closer, alec held him tighter, no longer caring if he messed up his perfectly placed shirt. Right as he was about to say something someone knocked on the door. he let out a sigh

“can we pretend we aren’t home?” magnus laughed against his lips, but moved away with a bounce in his step. 

“later” he gave him a smirk before opening the door. here goes nothing.

The first people who arrived alec had never seen before, a couple guys that looked like they belonged on the front page of a fashion magazine. One was talk with bright red hair, the other wore blue dress pants with suspenders. Defiantly magnus friends he thought, which was confirmed when magnus pulled them both in for a hug. The thing was that although magnus always said the only people coming were his closest friends, there had been times where random people had just walked in off the street so he never really knew for sure who had been invited. he walked over, suddenly feeling insecure about his t-shit and ripped jean combo. He stood beside magnus awkwardly, not really knowing what to do. Magnus grabbed his hand on instinct, alec was not even sure he knew he was doing it

“guys,” magnus said, his voice light “id like to finally introduce you to alec” the first guy , who’s red hair was styled perfectly to one side gave him a quick hug 

“ive heard so much about you, im Artist” alec gave him a nod before the other guy stuck out a hand 

“and im James” alec shock his hand, this guy—james, seemed more his speed, more neutral.   
He didn’t really know what to do so he just moved back to take magnus hand once more as more people arrived. Very quickly alec discovered that he had no idea how to act in magnus new world, the world of models and partiers, of people who were all exactly who they wanted to be. it was so different then his own, he had no idea what to say or what to do. Everyone seemed to be the best at something, everyone looked like they had just come from a photo shoot. magnus had made sure to introduce him to everyone he possibly could, telling him stories from one time or another. One owned a club in Brooklynn, one was a fashion photographer, he wanted to belong but instead alec snuck away. He made himself a drink before finding an empty stool at their little island, content to sit back and watch the party instead of participating. Although he might have been feeling outside his element, magnus certainly wasn’t. He watched him throw his head back in laughter at something a girl said then walk to the next person and take a shot. He was the best at talking to people, and of course alec thought, these were his people, these were the only remains of old life. alec couldn’t help but wonder how many of them fought for Al, how many of them were only there to get information

“should take a photo, it will last longer” he turned his head, trying to find the voice ready to fight back only to find none other than Simon standing beside him nervously fidgeting with his glasses. All his words died in his throat. He stared at him, not knowing what to say. He looked so different yet totally the same, like listening to an old song you haven’t heard in years yet know every word to. Instead of stumbling through a sentence he got up to give him a hug. It was not the same awkward embrace as he had been encountering all night, no this was the hug of two people who had been separated for a long time. 

“hey” he said into his shoulder. Simon had been his best friend once upon a time, the person he ranted to about magnus at three in the morning when he was drunk, who he would hit the town with and party all night or watch star wars with when magnus was away. He pulled away, keeping one hand on his upper arm. There was so much he wanted to say but he could barely hear him over the people and the music. If magnus had not bribed the neighbors they defiantly would have had complaints. He pointed to the roof “want to talk up there?” Simon nodded

Alec lead them up to the roof with drinks and chips in toe. The roof was more of a communal space for the people living in the building, it had chairs and fire pits, alec used the space a lot when he had to think. He sat down in one of the chairs as Simon sat across from him. he didn’t know how to start, what do you say to someone who you walked away from five years ago?

“I’m sorry” it wasn’t want he wanted to say but it was the first thing that came out. Simon didn’t look surprised by his words, like he was expecting them

“its okay alec, I get it. things got crazy and everyone had to pick sides, I’m sorry I didn’t pick yours” he looked so sincere. Of course, alec had thought about it before, why did none of his supposed friends chose him, why did they all pick magnus? He understood it now though

“don’t be sorry man, I shouldn’t have walked away in the first place” although he had never seen it, since he told him about it he couldn’t get the image of magnus sitting alone outside the bar, his entire world suddenly flipped upside down, the pure sorrow on his face. He couldn’t forget it. simon smiled

“you guys are doing okay I would take it?” he didn’t really know how to answer that. Yes they were doing okay, more than okay they were amazing. His life had become better the second he kissed magnus on top of the horrifying swing ride, yet there were still things wrong 

“yeah—yeah we are doing good, he’s, he’s amazing” simon smiled even more before taking a drink from his beer

“somethings never change” he knew was he was talking about. Alec can’t remember how many times he told Simon that he was amazing, or the most amazing thing that had ever happened to him. he put his drink down “he’s amazing, but?” he looked at him as if expecting an answer. Alec sighed.

“well..” he looked at Simon, making a split second decision “its amazing, he’s amazing and I have no regrets, but…” he took a deep breath “its hard, its hard having everything be so different, like my entire life changed in an instant, Its like I have to re-earn respect from people all over again, and it’s not just that” he looked t his hands “we don’t talk anymore. Sure we talk about the gym or our friends, but its like neither of us want to deal with the reality of our life so we just don’t” he felt better now that he said it, needing to get it all off his chest. Simon gave him a supportive smile 

“if it helps, I have never had more respect for you then when magnus told me what happened. If your feeling like this, Magnus is too, there is a lot going on for both of you, maybe its okay to save the big conversations until you both have some stable footing” it was fair, but he couldn’t help jonathans words playing in his head

“thank you, really” he took a sip of his own drink, enjoying the burn in left in his throat “enough about me, what’s up with you man?” he leaned back, relaxing a little bit as Simon dove into his life story. He was always one to talk, alec appreciated it. turns out Simon had quite the whole fight thing years ago and had joined a band, they were currently trying to make a record 

“I heard that you dated a girl who knocked you out in sparing?” he asked, remembering magnus mentioning something along the line of it one time. He saw his eyes light up at the mention 

“yeah. Clary, she trains at Als. Dating was a bad idea but after the whole sparing thing we actually have become best friends, she’s actually dating someone from your gym” alec laughed, feeling a lightness he hadn’t felt in ages when he thought of Simon getting knocked out by a girl. It was perfect. That is until he thought about the name Clary. 

“wait, she’s not dating a blond guy with two different colored eyes, is she?” he thought back to jace talking to him about a girl he was dating, although he had not been listening, he remembered the name

“yeah! Jake or something like that?”

“jace, his name is jace” he laughed at the thought. maybe she would put him in his place. Simons eyes got wide at his name

“like your jace?” alec just nodded his head, enjoying the moment to much to comment. He had a bad habit of not living in the moment. He was always one step ahead of everyone else, thinking months ahead of where he truly was, for once he wanted to enjoy a single moment. They both laughed to much, feeling slightly tipsy from the alcohol but alec wouldn’t have had it any other way. Once they had stopped, he put his drink down

“she will be good for him; some fear is healthy” it was easy to fall back into conversation after that. It was similar to when he and magnus had started back up again, the act was so easy, it was hard to remember that it had ever not been like that. They continued to talk about life, Simon Is going back to school for business to help with the band, he is currently dating a girl named Mia who he seems to be helplessly in love with, alec tells him about Florida, all the details he has not shared with anyone else. They lose track of any sense of time, the laughes get louder. The door to the roof opening breaks their bubble, both of them freezing as though a policeman was about to bust them for underage drinking like when they were kids. Instead magnus comes walking through the door 

“I thought id find you up here” there is a light around him that is inhuman, he seems to radiate happiness. It makes alec ach with pure contentless for this moment, he can’t look away

“he so owns you” simon says from beside him, obviously watching him but alec doesn’t care because magnus is walking towards them. instead of sitting in one of the many chairs surrounding them magnus chooses instead to place himself directly in alecs lap. Simon laughs as alec wraps his arms around him from behind making sure he doesn’t fall off. He missed this, he missed being able to be with magnus around people who don’t think twice about it., missed being able to be himself. he kissed magnus shoulder, the alcohol making him feel blissful and warm, but keeping him sober enough to funtion

“what are you boys talking about?” magnus says to Simon, hand automatically going to play with alecs. Simon smiles with his whole face but tried to cover it

“oh you know, life” alec rest his head against the back of magnus shoulder suddenly tired “how is everything going down stairs?” alec is sure magnus made some type of face because suddenly simon is laughing, alec moves his head so that his chin is against magnus shoulder so he can listen to their conversation 

“everyone has either crawled away or passed out, so I would say its been a success” alec briefly thought of the mess they would have to clean up in the morning, but the thought was brief as soon magnus was turning his head to see him 

“don’t worry, I kept them out of the loft” his voice was soft, meant only for alec to hear, he pushed his face into magnus neck as a response, feeling the warmth of him. He was always warm. Magnus moved one hand to run through alecs hair

“I forgot how disgustingly in love you two always are” Simon said, making a face of disgust even though he couldn’t keep the smile off his face at seeing his friends happy. As if to prove a point magnus placed a kiss on alecs temple before turning back to Simon 

“just admit it, you missed us” alec couldn’t believe he had given this up. he held onto magnus a little bit tighter. Simon gave a dramatic sigh

“I wouldn’t say I missed that,” he gestured at the two of them all dramatic like “but I did miss seeing you look like that, and all of us together like this” no one spoke for a minute, everyone to content to stay in the moment, enojoy what they had gotten back. Simon would have been there for magnus when he left, must have seen him broken on the ground the same way alec was. it was weird to think about it. 

“I should get going, I have to work in vary few hours and I need at least a couple hours of sleep.” he got up which meant that be willingly magnus got up too leaving alec exposed. He sighed and followed them. he saw Simon say something to magnus and suddenly he was walking towards the door. alec started to follow but Simons hand on his arm stopped him

“listen, your not gonna, you know leave again right?” it was a fair question that alec had been waiting for him to ask. He watched magnus leave 

“not unless he asks me too” simon scoffs beside him but soon his face goes serious 

“im serious lightwood, he can’t go through that again, I don’t think he would survive it so you better be sure” they had not talked much about what had happened after they broke up, he knew that magnus had started drinking a lot more but he didn’t know the extent of it. he looked at Simon 

“I know Simon, I’m sorry I put you both through that, but im here now and im not leaving again” it was a promise that he intended to keep, a promise to both of them. Simon smiled at him, seeming to believe his true words. 

“I missed you buddy” with that he walked towards the door to follow magnus in 

When he walked through the door into the loft it was, well it was something. the sight made alec want to crawl out of his skin, he liked things to be clean and well kept, the hurricane of his home was not ideal. Magnus must have noticed because he took his hand

“ don’t think about it love, let’s just go to sleep” it was closer to five in the morning and things needed to be taken care of like the strangers currently sleeping on their floor but thankfully magnus had kept them all down stairs so when they got upstairs it was easy to pretended they weren’t there, as long as he didn’t look over the balcony that is. He fell onto the bed, suddenly more then exhausted. Magnus laughed while he took off the now messy dress shirt, he was wearing 

“did you enjoy yourself at least?” magnus asks, there was a sense of hope on his face. Although alec didn’t understand his world or its people he could see how much magnus wanted him too, how badly he wanted alec to love his world as much as he did. It was the same face alec had had when he should magnus the gym. 

“yeah, yeah I had a great time” magnus layed down beside him “how was your night?” magnus put his hands over his head to stretch out his back like a cat. 

“amazing. I haven’t seen some of these people in forever, I missed them” he turned on his side to face alec “what did you really think of them?” He thought the question over before responding

“they were gorgeous,” magnus smiled at that, moving his hand to take one of alecs “you belong with them” it was true, magnus should be with someone like that, someone who could fit the part and belong to that world, he had no idea why magnus had chosen to be with him after he had seen the people he knew. 

“your wrong” it was a statement, not ounce of hesitation or doubt, he said it like it was a fact. “I belong with you” he moved forward until their noses brushed together, alec was suddenly happy he was sober enough to remember this. magnus leaned for a soft kiss before moving so his head was resting against alecs chest, content to just lay in the loft full of strangers. Alec held him tight, suddenly feeling confident that no matter what the world would through at them, not jonathans threats nor Als games, not some past that magnus had kept from him, nothing was going to take away the life they were creating for themselves, alec was sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan and Simon are back!!! its kinda a chill chapter, think of it as the calm before the storm! what do you guys think will happen next? leave your comments and predictions below and please leave kudos if you enjoyed this!! thank you all again so much for reading, it means so much to me!!


	4. FOUR

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys! im so sorry the im so late posting this, I was traveling for the past two days and haven't had any wifi! I hope you guys like this chapter though and thank you so much for reading this story!

He awoke to a crash. 

Stretching his arms out he reached for magnus but he came up empty

“magnus?” he said, now feeling a little more concerned about the crash then before. He heard someone running up the stair case to the loft, he opened his eyes to see magnus running towards him

“good Moring darling” he placed a quick kiss to his forehead, moving himself so that he was blocking his view of downstairs

“magnus what…” he gestured wildly with his hands, his mind still half asleep. He tried to lean around him but magnus grabbed his shoulders

“for the sake of our relationship I think its best that you just go back to sleep for twenty minutes or so while I go deal with that” he slowly walked over to the staircase with a wide grin on his face. Alec had no idea what he was talking about but did not protest the motion of going back to sleep. he’s sure that one of the strangers who had passed out last night had broken something, that the sight of their poor downstairs would make him explode. He gave magnus a look before falling back down to the pillow

“love you too” he said while running back down the stairs, alec only hummed in response before darkness took over once again

When he woke up the second time their was a cup of coffee on the table beside him, he went to grab it only to realize that their was something attached to it

“all clear downstairs   
Went for a run be back soon -M”

He smiled at that. Magnus usually ran either in the morning or at night and alec didn’t understand it. in his mind running was his hell, it was horrible and painful and the worst part of fighting, he had no idea how people could find running enjoyable. But somehow magnus did, he said it calmed him down, made him feel more like a human when he was stressed, made him feel like himself. He sat up, taking the coffee with him as he went down the stairs ready for the worst, but instead it was clean, and the people were gone. he sat down at the bar, looking around for any traces of the night before but there was none. He smiled. He took his phone out and realized there was about a hundred missed texts and or calls from his family

“you need to get to the gym”

“where are you”

“call me”

“hes here”

“get here ASAP, magnus too” 

The last one was sent near minutes ago, whatever crisis that may be happening was not over. He felt anxiety run down his spin at all the possible things that could be awaiting him, he wanted to ignore it, to just go back to bed and pretend it’s not happening. Why is something always happening? He sighed while phoning magnus, he knows he will respond. They have a rule when it comes to magnus run time, alec knows how much magnus needs his time to de-stress and to breath and the only reason he is allowed to interrupt it is if its an emergency. Like he expected he picked up of the first ring

“alec, what’s wrong?” he says, clearly out of breath. He had to laugh at the immediate reaction and from the way his breath was coming out in huge breaths

“we have to go to the gym” he took a sip of his coffee, noting that it was going to do nothing to help his growing nerves. He heard magnus take in a breath on the other side

“you phone me, to tell me we have to go to the gym?” he heard the annoyance in his voice. Alec looked down at the ground, not wanting to finish this conversation, wanting to   
pretend like it was all good

“I think hes at the gym magnus” his voice was tired, he was tired. He wanted this to be over, all the joy of last night suddenly seeming like a life time ago as he is reminded why they needed a party in the first place. Although he did feel something like joy when he thought about the fact he could text Simon all about it later. Magnus didn’t respond for a while, just steadied his breathing, alec gave him time

“ill meet you there.” is all he said before the line went dead.   
As soon as he got off the phone, he shot his sister a text that they were on their way, he changed into some new clothes before heading out the door. 

He had no idea what as about to happen, it was like the moment in a horror movie where you don’t know if the main character is going to run away or be killed, except this was his real life and not some movie he could walk away from. he stopped at a little coffee shop they liked on the way there, thinking that magnus will appreciate the gesture. The gym was his safe place and the idea of someone so horrible being there made his skin crawl, like he would stain the very soul of the gym by stepping a foot inside the door. he wanted him gone, wanted this over for good. The gym was close to their loft, alec wished that day it had been farther. He saw magnus waiting for him around the corner from the door so that anyone standing in the gym wouldn’t see him. he looked up from the ground when he saw alec.   
As he got closer, he realized two things, one was that magnus was wearing a Nephilim hoodie, an act that was more defiance than anything else, the second thing was that magnus looked terrified. Alec realized that maybe magnus had hopped deep down that it was truly over, that the fact that he left was enough. But he didn’t hear Jonathans warning. 

“you okay?” alec said as he approached. He didn’t grab his hand or run his hand over the side of his face like he wanted to. No, he knew that when magnus was scared he liked to be alone in his own world, liked to out up walls in order to surive what was next, so it surprised alec when magnus grabbed his hand without a word, gripping onto it like it was the only thing keeping him from running away. 

“I want this over” magnus said with determination like he was reading alecs thoughts from earlier. They both wanted this to be done, to be over.

“it will be” he said. He looked past magnus to the doors of the gym, he had never wanted to stay outside this much. He gripped his hand impossibly tighter before leading the way, magnus followed with a deep breath. Alec wished he could take them both somewhere this would be over, somewhere they could just live in peace, he wished magnus would be free from this. he opened the door.

He looked around, not noticing anything at first, that is until he looked past the front desk to the back of the room where a group was standing. He saw his dad standing with his arms crossed and his sister and brother beside him like a united front line. standing in front of them was Al, and beside him Jonathan. alec thought he fit the part of the villain; they both did. All red and sharp edges. He hated the way magnus looked like them. magnus who was gripping his hand and taking one step at a time to the back 

“together” he said. It was something he found himself saying more than often these days, the world keeps throwing things at them. 

“together” magnus said back fiercely.  
He saw his dads eyes go to him before he seemed to take a breath before pointing at them. all eyes turned to them and it was too late. He saw Al smile a wicked smile, all eyes were on them as they walked across the gym floor, the fighters stopped their class to watch them. he wanted this to be private. He ignores Al and walks over to his dad, he tells izzy and jace to leave them, this was something that was between them. they left with one last look at Al that could kill. After he stood beside his dad with knives in his eyes. Jonathan looked back at him, but he wasn’t looking at him, he was looking at magnus with something undetermined in his eyes. Alec held his hand tighter

“ah, the prodigal’s son returns” he ran his eyes over magnus, then alec as if sizing them up. alec hated the look in his eyes, it was dangrus, unpredictable. 

“why are you here?” magnus said sternly beside him, not letting any of the fear or uncertainty into his voice. His dad seemed surprised but not unprepared

“its safe to say that what happened in Florida was, unprofessional to say the lest” it was the first thing he had ever said that alec agreed with. It was unprofessional on all sides, it was exactly what the sport is trying not to be. as much as he hates It he knows it was not the greatest. Al looked at Jonathan “im here to set the record straight. Your best against my best six months from today” he looked at alec “unfortunately your best is currently out of commission, so I guess my unworthy son will have to do” absolutely not. It was bait, how could anyone not see that this was nothing more than an excuse to humiliate magnus, to punish him for what had happened in Florida. He was about to respond when he felt magnus move his hand to his shoulder in a motion to stop him. what was he doing?

“why would you want this?” magnus said, alec could practically hear his mind working, trying to figure things out before giving an answer. Magnus always thought things through more than alec, always took longer to react. 

“because I want to give you the chance to get what you’ve always wanted. To best me, in a fair fight” it was a appealing offer if you ignored the fact that Al was a snake and everything he said was double sided. There was no way they could do this, not after they had not even recovered from the last one. magnus didn’t say anything for what seemed like forever, he just looked at Jonathan, then at his dad and then back to Jonathan. Something was happening that alec did not understand, the same thing that had happened earlier the day before, there was something that he wasn’t getting. Jonathan didn’t take his eyes off magnus the whole time. Alec expected there to be something like Als smile on his face but instead there was something else, something that alec couldn’t name. he looked at magnus, trying to figure out what he was going to say but he couldn’t wait any longer 

“listen—”

“ill do it.” his eyes did not move from jonathans. What? He looked at magnus is disbelief 

“what, magnus—”

“ill do it.” there was a finality in his voice that alec knew he couldn’t fight with, but he wanted to. He wanted to yell at him, how could he do this, how could he not see what a trap this is, how could he do this to him, how could he make this choice without even talking to him when they had just gotten back Florida, their lives were still in pieces and he wanted to through another bomb into it? he wanted to say so many things but magnus was not looking at him. he turned to Al who knew he had won. he needed to leave. He needed away from magnus, from Al, from the entire situation that he should not have had anything to do with. His mind was not forming thoughts other than rage. He gave magnus one last look before walking away.

He walked out of the doors and didn’t stop, he didn’t stop when he got to the curb where he met magnus, he didn’t stop when he got to the coffee shop, he kept going. He walked up and down the streets, not caring where he was or who saw him. he watched the people around him, watched him talk on the phone or hold onto a loved one. all of these people had their own lives, their own problems and stories. They were all dealing with things he didn’t know he he did know that none of them where dealing with his problem. What was magnus thinking with this? alec didn’t want to think about it, he realized he didn’t want to deal with it or realize it at all so he went to the one place we always went, he walked until he was sitting in the little bar he used to call home. He didn’t want to be sober suddenly, he didn’t want to think about the fact that his life was never going to be okay because of the situations he kept throwing himself into, he didn’t want to think about how he was mad at magnus for making this decision without him, he was being selfish by not thinking about how this would affect all of them, how was alec supposed to watch this happen. he didn’t want to think about the fact that a part of him wished it was him getting in the ring because at lest that would mean he was still relevant. He thought of what would happen next, he would have to train magnus which is something he didn’t want to do, training jace was hard enough. Having to put someone you love through that, having to watch them be reduced to nothing and not being able to help them, having to watch them broken on the floor and have to say they are still not enough, it was the hardest part about teaching and alec was not sure he could do that with magnus. There were so many thoughts going through his head they threaten to drowned him. he felt like there was a golf club stuck in his throat so he decided to wash it away with a drink. 

Hes not sure how long he sat there, long enough that he stopped caring about the fight or magnus, long enough for him to forget why he was mad in the first place

“I thought I’d find you here” says a familiar voice from beside him. he turns his head so fast he almost falls over but the person catches him instead. It takes longer than it should for him to recognize who it is

“Izzzzz!!!” he says happily. Izzy puts him back on the chair, keeping a hand on his shoulder in order to steady him.

“easy their brother” her voice sounded sad. She sat down in the seat next to him “magnus is looking for you.” he sighed taking the last sip of whatever drink he was on. He didn’t want to talk about this

“fuck him” he says looking around for the bartender, but izzy grabs his hand

“you don’t mean that” she says softly 

“he took the fight izy! He took the fight against his crazy ass dad who is obviously trying to kill him without even talking to me!!!” he let his head fall on his arms on the table. 

“im sure he has a reason” she said while rubbing small circles on his back 

“I don’t want him to have a reason! I don’t want us to always have to have some crazy stressful crazy plan for some crazy fight! I don’t want to do this again iz, his dad will kill him this time” his voice got quieter near the end of his rant, the defeat was evident. He didn’t want to do it all again 

“I know alec, but this is magnus life, this is what his world is like” it wasn’t always, this is not at all what their lives used to be like. They used to go out for brunch or have party’s, they would spar on the weekend or go to the beach or do normal human things “no one is making you do this, no one would blame you if you didn’t” that got his attention. As mad as he was at the situation, at magnus, he hadn’t even thought for a second that he wouldn’t do it, that he would leave him to do it alone. Maybe in a different world he would have walked away, he would have walked away and let magnus deal with his horrible dad alone, to deal with the mess he has created but not in this one. in this one there was no chance that alec would leave him to do this, no matter how mad or upset he was, no matter if it lead to the destruction of them both

“of course, im going to do it, I just needed space” he needed time to think, to not be mad anymore. There was nothing he could do about it now, nothing he could do to change it. magnus had said yes and in doing so had condemned both of them. he felt more sober then he wanted to 

“you can’t drink this away alec” he wanted her to go away

“I’m not”

“it’s 4 in the afternoon and you are drunk” but that didn’t mean that he was trying to drink away all his problems, it just meant that he was temporally trying to forget about it

“I don’t want to go home yet” he didn’t, he didn’t want to deal with it yet, didn’t want to have that conversation with magnus yet. izzy sighed 

“can I at lest call someone? go somewhere other then this bar and sober up” alec didn’t want to talk to anyone else, he just wanted to be alone. He didn’t respond which izzy took as a sign to get out her phone. he did not want to talk to anyone 

“iz pleaseeeeeee, ill stay here but don’t send anyone else” it was too late. She was already on the phone talking to someone he didn’t know. he turned away from her as the bar tender brought him a glass of water, and a mug of black coffee. 

“alright, I have to go to work but Simon is on his way. Stay here okay?” she put her hand on his shoulder. He felt like he was being treated like a child but she didn’t give him time to protest as she walked away before he could say another word.   
He took a sip of his water. Did Izzy really think that he wouldn’t do this? he’s sure that she called magnus the second she was out the doors. He cant imagine how magnus felt, whether he was regretful In his choice or not. He had to have known what he was asking alec by saying yes. He finished his cup of water, and then another and another, suddenly not liking the way he couldn’t form a coherent thought. this was no way to handle himself yet he didn’t want to go home. Soon enough simon was walking through the doors. Alec really didn’t want to explain himself to someone else, not right now when he was still trying to figure out how he really felt about it himself but was too drunk to understand it. But simon didn’t speak. Instead he sat down in the chair beside him and pulled out a book as if alec wasn’t there at all. He had never been more grateful for another person as alec was of simon. 

That’s how he spent his day. Sitting in a bar alone beside simon, saying nothing yet everything at the same time. By the time it was dark alec knew what he was going to do, knew what he had to say

“Thank you” he said to simon as he got up, simon getting up as well

“are you good lightwood? Not going to go fall over in a ditch or anything right?” it was a fair question, alec had had a moment of unclear thinking there but his head was almost normal, he knew the cold air would help. 

“im alright simon, im just gonna head home” simon seemed to realizes a breath alec dient know he was holding. Was simon expecting him to leave too? He didn’t question it, not right now. Instead he gave simon a warm smile and headed out the door

It was almost two am by the time he got to their building. He took his time on the walk, making sure he knew what to say, clearing his head in the cold air. New York really was a beautiful city at night, mostly because it was never asleep. Alec loved New York at night. He stopped at the door to his apartment and took a deep breath. He had no idea what was going to be on the other end of the door, but he couldn’t put it off forever. Slowly he opened the door.

“magnus?” he said quietly into the space, not wanting to wake him up. he looked around the room not sure what he was looking for, when he saw someone was moving towards him, suddenly he was being pushed back by the force of which a body was thrown against him, arms wrapping around his neck tightly

“alec” He said in a breath. Alec breathed before wrapping his arms around magnus waist, moving them so they were inside the door. He didn’t quite understand, he had not been gone that long but he still missed the feeling of magnus against him, he felt all the anger and uncertainty die in his throat for a minute, but only a minute. Soon he found himself pulling back, needing to say what he needed to say, magnus moved his hands so they were holding onto his forearms. For the first time they made eye contact and alec couldn’t breath. Magnus looked sad. Utterly, and hopelessly sad while at the same time screaming at him to stay. He had been crying, alec could still see the tear marks on his checks. He had only been gone a little while. 

“don’t leave” magnus said quietly into the space between them. it was not what he thought magnus would say. He felt magnus grip his arms tighter and suddenly it all came together 

“you dident think I was going to come back” its not a question as much as it’s a statement, one that magnus dose not disagree with. Instead he looks at the ground with guilt. The realization is enough to knock him off his feet, magnus didn’t think he would come back. He thinks back to izzys words early, to simons concern and realizes that everyone thought it might have been over, everyone but alec. How could magnus think he would leave him, after everything they have been through. But he did. He left him five years ago without so much as a word. He moves his hands to cup each side of magnus face

“Magnus, I need you to listen to me” magnus eyes are big, he looked so different from the fighter who stood at the gym this morning. “don’t think for a second that im not mad at you right now because I am, im more than mad actually” magnus try’s to look away but alec holds him firm “but it doesn’t matter how mad I am, or how crazy things get Im not going to leave. I promise you I’m staying here, okay?” magnus nods, leaning in to kiss his palm. “good” he moves his hand away so that they are standing face to face. He is reminded of the times they stood face to face at the gym, in the ring, like both of those times they were about to go to war

“I love you” magnus says, his eyes surer now than before.

“I love you” he says. They both know they are about to fight, a fight bigger than they have had in years, but no matter what they would still be there afterwards. They both look at each other, both wanting the moment last forever but it couldn’t, alec couldn’t stop the words coming out of his mouth anymore

“how could you take that fight magnus? How could you do that without even talking to me about it first?!” he tried his best to keep his voice calm, to keep in neutral but he couldn’t, he couldn’t stop the anger from creeping through it.

“can’t you see that this is the only way its ever going to end? My dad is never going to stop alec, this is the only way it will stop” it was a repeat of what they talked about that morning. Magnus looked at him with a plea, as if begging him to understand

“it is going to end, its going to end with you lying dead on the canvas magnus!!” that shut him up, alec took it as his chance “this is your dad we are talking about, do you really think there is any chance its going to be a fair fight? You will lose, one way or another you will lose, there has to be another way to stop this” he hadn’t even realizes he was thinking the things he had said, the thought of magnus getting hurt, or worse in the ring was one he had not even known he was thinking about but now that he had said it it was the only thing he could think about. 

“theres no other way!!!” he was closer to yelling then alec had seen him in a long time, he could hear the frustration in his voice, as if there was something alec was not getting.   
Maybe he would understand it if they ever talked about it. magnus took a breath before continuing. “there is no other way. You don’t know my dad alec, he wont stop until this is over, I’m not going to let you get hurt because of me, I have to do this” what did he mean, who the hell was this guy! He wanted to ask, the words right on the tip of his toung but   
there were more import things right now

“right and you just want me to train you for this fight, want me to stand in the corner and watch while Jonathan—while he, he—” he couldn’t get the words out, couldn’t think of it, could not entertain the idea of magnus not walking out of that ring, he didn’t even want to think about him standing in the ring at all “Do you really think that you will be able to hurt Jonathan if it came down to it? this is not like Florida Magnus, only one person is going to walk out of that ring, you have to know that” he felt anxiety run up his spin at the thoughts his mind was creating magnus stepped a little closer, his eyes going a little darker, alec breath got a little faster

“Jonathan is the very reason we are in this mess to begin with,” alec knew about the bar, knew that they were drunk, but the way magnus said it made him think for a second that there was more. he didn’t think about it too long though cause soon magnus grabbed his hand carefully “if it comes down to hurting him or hurting you, Jonathan will fall. I will do everything in my power to do this” alec hated this, he hated everything about it. magnus might be saying this now but they both knew it wouldn’t be that simple, it would not be a fair fight, There was no way magnus was going to win, if there was his dad would not have offered the fight in the first place. He felt like the world was ending.

“magnus—please” his voice broke without his permission on the last word

“I have to do this alec. I have to and you know it. this is how we end it, I have to finish this” he didn’t want to believe it or even think it but a part of him knew it was true but there had to be another way “ I cant do this without you alec. I know its asking a lot, more than anyone should have to ask of someone they love but I’m asking it anyways because I need you” magnus was now holding both his hands in his. Alec didn’t want this, he couldn’t do this, they couldn’t—he couldn’t 

“i—” suddenly he needed to hold onto him, needed to feel him near him. he didn’t want this but by the look in magnus eyes he knew he was too late to stop it. “okay” he choked out, not able to say anything else in threat of his voice breaking. There was more to say, more to discus and plan but right now all the anger he had been feeling had turned into fear, blind fear that was coming out of his eyes. Maybe that was what he had been feeling all along.

Magnus pulled him into his arms, alec grabbing onto the fabric of magnus t-shit like somehow it would save him, would save them. he pushed his face into magnus shoulder, breathing in the scent of him. he felt magnus push his face into his own shoulder, felt his hands grip into his back. 

“please” he said over and over again, maybe he was trying to make a deal with a god he didn’t always believed in, or maybe he was trying to convince himself to do it or magnus not   
to. there was nothing he could do to stop this, the only thing he could do was hold magnus tightly again him in the quiet of their home, knowing that they were going to be living in a different world when the sun came up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again they are getting through into the fray! thoughts on this chapter guys? this whole story is not just about another fight but it Is a part of it and I hope you guys love this as much as I do!! thank you once again for your support, leave kudos and comments If you enjoyed it!!


	5. FIVE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys! this chapter is not the greatest but there is some stuff you guys need to know about so that's all this chapter, I promise that if you keep reading its going to get wayyyy better!! thank you as always for your support

They fell asleep on the couch that night, both people unwilling to let go long enough to make it upstairs. It didn’t matter that they had talked about it until the sun came up or that magnus had reassured him over and over again that he would be fine. There was a very real chance that he wouldn’t be this time and once alec thought about it he couldn’t get himself to unthink about it. but despite his wanting, and his need to stay tangled up together on the couch, they had real things to do. If magnus was going to have even the slightest chance at walking out of that ring, or even the illusion that he would, they needed a plan. Alec lifted his head that had been resting on magnus chest so that he was looking up at him

“we have to get up” he said quietly, his voice rough from sleep. magnus shut his eyes tighter. Maybe he too didn’t want to face the situation they had once again put themselves in

“few more minutes” he ran a hand through alecs hair while slowly opening his eyes. No one spoke, both just living in the feeling of each other, of the moment 

“I cant believe we are doing this again” all the venom had been sucked out of his words the night before, he now said them as a truth.

“we do seem to attract rather dramatic situations, don’t we?” alec laughed at that, It was true. Compared to the last month the last five years seemed absolutely mundane

“what did I ever do without you?” he said, this was the easiest conversation he had had in awhile 

“I really don’t know” they both laughed, alec moving up for a kiss. Magnus hands shifted in his hair so he could pull him closer. alec wanted to capture the moment in a bubble so he could keep it forever. They had hard days coming, fighting was going to drain them both, it was going to be hard and alec wanted to remember this moment when things got to much, wanted to remember what this felt like. He moved his hand so that is was cupping the side of his face, the side that had been bruised for weeks. He moved back slightly 

“if we are really going to do this, you cant hate me when it’s over” it was something he thought of when magnus asked him to help him, to coach him through his. Training was hard and coaches had to be brutal, whether it was your best friend, your child or the person you loved, if you weren’t hard on them, they get hurt. It had destroyed his relationship with his father for years, it had made him and jace not speak for weeks, it was hard not to hate your coach when you were fighting like he was. alec was not even sure he was going to be able to do it. magnus pulled back fully, making sure alec was looking at him 

“alec, I could never hate you. even when you left me I still loved you, we can do this” alec knew the conviction in his voice was false, that he was pretending he wasn’t scared shitless at the idea, but it is what it is. There was one more thing he needed to know

“what’s going on with you and Jonathan? You guys keep having these weird eye moments that I don’t understand” he saw magnus look away for a second, fast enough that alec would have missed it if he hadn’t been trying to see it

“nothing that you have to worry about, just tension from the past” before he could ask him anymore on the subject, he was moving to get up from under him, alec sat up to let him 

“coffee?” he said while walking to their tiny kitchen

“please” he followed magnus up, taking a seat at the island in front on a piece of paper. He took a breath. “okay, we need to make a plan” on the piece of paper in front of him he wrote down the days of the week “we have four months which may sound like a lot but its not” it’s true. Four months was only sixteen weeks, which was nothing. 

“we are fighting at 132 pounds” magnus said while pouring coffee. Of course, they were. Magnus must have stayed around after he left which given time to think was not the smartest thing alec had ever done because it meant that he didn’t know any of the information he now wishes he had. 

“132?” it was because Al knows magnus dose not fight at 132, nor does Jonathan but Al also knows that Magnus has a hell of a time cutting weight when Jonathan can lose ten pounds over night. Cutting weight was a funny thing, some people could do it and some couldn’t. Add this to the list of shit they had to deal with. He looked at magnus with big eyes

“did you try to get it higher?” 

“it was at 130, you should be happy” Al was officially trying to kill his son. This was going to suck

“you know you are going to have to get to 130 anyways right?” you always wanted to be underweight if you had to travel which alec was sure they were going to. He ran his fingers though his hair. Four weeks was defiantly not a lot of time 

“I am yes, but I would have had to get down to 127 which is just asking for literal death” magnus looked down at his coffee as if suddenly having second thoughts about drinking it but deciding to anyways 

“what weight are you right now?” he wrote down the weight on the same piece of paper, already trying to figure out how he was going to get magnus there. magnus looked at him with a innocent smile “how bad is it?” the moment you had to weigh in before starting a fight camp was horrible, you were always at lest ten pounds above were you needed to be, and you always knew how horrible it was going to be to drop it. 

“147” he takes a sip of his coffee, alec can’t help but notice the way his hair falls into his face. 17 pounds. It would be no big deal for someone who was good at cutting weight like himself, alec had lost 17 pounds over night before but he knew magnus was not like that, for some reason his body didn’t cut weight well at all, he would have to fight for every pound. But that was the sport. Magnus jumped up onto the table alec was writing on, pulling his feet up with him. normally alec would complain about how they eat on that table but today he didn’t have the energy to care, there were bigger things to worry about

“and where is this all taking place?” a part of him already knew the answer, knew it because Al is twisted and would find an irony in it that alec found disturbing 

“at lest we can go to that amazing milk shake place again” magnus didn’t look at him, instead stared at his drink. They were going back to Florida. Alec didn’t think he would ever have to be there again under those circumstances but here they were.

“I am underqualified for this” he said under his breath while getting up, he needed to talk to someone who knew what they were doing. alec had never trained anyone for a fight this big, let alone one that was fixed, he needed help. Magnus looked up as alec headed for the door

“see you at the gym later?” alec threw on his boots 

“you bet your ass you will” he gave him a smile before walking out the door. he stopped before the door closed “and stop drinking coffee” he heard magnus laugh as he walked away

The walk to the gym was short, but nice. There was no monster waiting for him at the end of the road, no threats, he was simple walking to the gym. When he got there, he looked around the room for the person he was looking for 

“dad, I need to talk” he said. His dad was sitting at his desk in the corner of the room, waiting for the next class to start. He looked up when he saw alec

“of course, son” he motioned him behind the desk to the empty chair sitting against the wall 

“its about magnus” his dad sighed, sitting up straighter. It was still weird to talk to his dad about things regarding magnus, but with every conversation it got easier. 

“I was shocked when he said yes to that fight without even hearing the conditions” alec leaned his head on his hands, leaning against his knees to support him 

“tell me about it” he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of being in the gym beside his dad. “I don’t know how to do this” he said. It was hard for him to say because he wanted his dad to think he could do anything that people throw at him, but if he did this wrong people were going to get hurt. His dad sighed 

“you shouldn’t have to be the one to do this, but the universe seems to have a personal vendetta against you both so it seems that’s is how its going to go” he looked up so he was facing his dad, needed him to tell him how to save him, how to fix this. 

“how can I train him for this fight dad, he hasn’t really trained more than a week in eight months, he has to drop almost twenty pounds, he is fighting a fight that is going to end—” he took a breath to steady his voice. His dad put a hand on his shoulder 

“its going to be the hardest thing either of you has ever had to do,” they had been through a lot in the past, he thought back to their history and how they always seem to come back to each other, but this was different. This was not alec walking away at a bar or them having some petty argument over jealously or personal problems, no, Al wanted this to be their ending “there are going to be days when you can’t stand the sight of each other, at points he will hate you” he was about to protest when his dad gave him a look that silenced him “I remember when I had to train your mom for a big fight, it almost broke us” alec didn’t know what to say. The things he had ever heard about his mom had been so little over his life that she was more of concept instead of a person. He did know that before she got pregnant she fought, it was how they meet. “ I had to push her to places she didn’t want to go, she would yell at me, tell me that she hated me for doing that to her, especially when she had to cut weight, I would just stand there and take it because there was nothing I was going to be able to say to her that would make her feel any better” alec looked down at his hands. He thought back to when he was small, when he would yell at his dad and run out of the gym in tears, his dad would wait for him to come back before simply starting the exercise again. at the time he thought it was cruel, but it made him strong, it made him the best. It was a coach’s job to get you ready not to be your friend “it will happen to you, he is going to turn away and hate you, but if it means enough, if you mean enough to each other you will make it through it” he wanted to believe that they could, that it would work out for them, the last one sort of did so why not this one? 

“thank you” he made sure his dad knew he meant it, made sure to look him in the eyes 

“now that that’s out of the way, why don’t we talk about how much you hate the fact that its not you getting in the ring” he looked at his dad as if he had grown a second head, that was not why he had come to talk to them “oh come on alec, I see the way you watch the fighters, the way you light up even watching sparing, I know you are getting stir crazy not having a fight” It may have been a little true. It had been years since he hadn’t had to train for a fight, there had always been another one around the corner. Last year he fought four times in three months, just one after another. He had been a very active fighter and for the first time in years there was radio silence. he looked down. He didn’t know how to live without a new fight on the horizon, he dident want to say that the idea horrified him. He didn’t want to say it out loud. They were in a horrible situation and he didn’t want to add him somehow being jealous of the fact that magnus was the one fighting onto it, it was a horrible thing to think.

“if I was, it would make me a horrible person” he said it quietly, more like a loud thought then a real statement but his dad heard him 

“it would make you a fighter. You have been fighting since you were eight years old alec, its not the fact that you don’t have a fight, its that You are scared you might not get another one” he looked up and knew he had it written all over his face. He had grown up in the fight world his entire life, he knew how it worked, how the best in the world could have one bad fight and suddenly their entire career was over. He had been so busy the past weeks that he didn’t let himself think about it, but every day that he didn’t get a new fight made it seem real. He didn’t want to think about it, not with magnus fighting and having to be there and train him, he didn’t have time to think about his own life, if he let him mind go there for even a second it threatens to overcome him. “I hate to say this alec, but what did you really think was going to happen? you had a fixed fight and showed it to the entire world, are you surprised that no one wants to take you on their card?” he shock his head. He knew what he was doing when he took the fight with magnus, when he stood up to Al in the ring, he knew there was a real chance he was destroying his future but the reality of it was harder to deal with then he ever realized. He didn’t regret what he did, he never would but that didn’t make it any easier 

“it doesn’t matter what I thought, its about magnus right now, my problems could wait” they had to, the pure grief he felt when he thought of never fighting again was more then he could deal with right now. 

“whatever you say son” his dad pulled out a piece of paper from his desk and started to write out a plan.   
It took them three hours to come up with a plan that should by all means work for magnus, the hard part was the weight cut but there was no way to make that better. He would work out six days a week, every week until the fight. Sunday was a day to rest. Mondays and Wednesday are cardio and weight training, Tuesday and Thursday are drills and technique, and Fridays and Saturdays are cardio and clinch. If magnus had any chance he was going to have to change the game, go into the ring as a totally different fighter then he had ever been before. He needed to look like one of them. 

“do you really think this will be enough?” his gave him a encouraging smile

“I think it will be just enough”

Instead of meeting magnus at the gym like he was supposed to, he texted him to meet him at a hill not far away from the gym. Alec liked to call it the hell, as that’s what it was. it was something magnus had never been exposed to before but alec knew it would be more beneficial then pads where going to be right now. It basically included running sprints up and down a huge hill in very hot weather.

It was a Friday and the streets where packed as he made his way down the road. Everyone had places to be, headphones on, everyone was so lost in their own little words that they didn’t even seem to notice the people walking around them, including alec. He was so caught up thinking about what kind of sprints he was going to make magnus do up and down the hill that he didn’t even realize the person walking towards him was looking at their phone. before he knew it they were both on the ground

“I’m so sorry” he said, trying to pick up his note book along with a dozen other magazines or books his dad had thrown at him about nutrition and flood planning. He looked at the guy on the ground beside him, the first thing he noticed was that he had bright blue hair.

“don’t worry about it, I should have been watching where I was going” he gave him a kind smile, it was unusual for people to be so nice in his city but his accent suggested that he wasn’t from here at all. The stranger handed him the rest of his books was they stood up. “you shouldn’t listen to those books, they are filled with crap” he said pointing at the top one. who did this guy think he was? “sorry I’m not trying to be a dick, I’m actually a nutritionist” there was no way in hell that he could be serious. There was no way that the person he accidently ran into was the person he needed. But he did look the part with his high cheek bones. 

“no shit, really?” it was not the best thing that he could have said but It was what came out. He moved so that they were standing off to the side of the main walkway a little bit. The guy laughed 

“yeah, no shit” the guy looked at the books in alecs arms again “just doing some light reading or…” alec laughed back nervously. 

“no—no I have a fighter fighting in a few months and I have to get him down 20 pounds” the thing with fighters were that very few of them actually had any idea what they were doing when it came to nutrition and cutting weight. People found what worked for them and did it even if it was the unhealthiest thing in the world. trainers past it on to their fighters and that was that. the problem came in when the fighter didn’t cut weight the same way as the fighter, like magnus. Then the trainer only had so much knowledge and it usually ended in a total shit show of just not eating for a week

“well those books aren’t going to help you with that. cutting weight for athletic events is different from just losing weight. You have to maintain the right amount of muscle mass while losing the fat and its actually an entire course in university that I’m not going to bore you with the detail of” the guy looked down at his watch before looking back at alec   
“listen I have to run but I’ve got some free time tomorrow morning if you wanted to go over this stuff the right way, see if I can’t give you some help” alec didn’t know what to say.   
This was something that shouldn’t be happening but it was, there was a huge chance that this guy was going to kill him but maybe just maybe the universe was throwing them a bone, maybe this was the help he had been praying for. He did something he never would have done

“what would be great actually yeah” he held a hand out “im alec” the guy shook his hand

“im Dom”

They decided that they were going to meet at the coffee shop near the gym, the one alec went to all the time. It might be a death trap but alec needed as much help as he could get with this, he would risk getting kidnaped in a coffee shop if it meant more help for magnus. Speaking of magnus, it was not long before he spotted magnus standing at the bottom of   
the hill looking as out of place as ever in his work out gear. Alec loved it

“hey” he said as he approached, magnus eyes lit up when he spotted him 

“hello darling, care to explain why we are here?” alec laughed at his innocents to the hill and put an arm around him 

“your going to run up it” magnus didn’t speak for a second only stared straight ahead of him. he turned his head

“pardon me?” alec laughed again

“you heard me, hill sprints are about to become your new best friend” magnus pulls away from him

“im not sure I want to be best friends with them, it seems like its going to be a pretty abusive relationship” alec shakes his head

“you’ll get used to it” alec went over to throw his stuff on the ground “let’s start nice and easy, run up and run down five times” he sat on a metal railing. Magnus continued to stare at him “I mean now” magnus sighed but dropped his stuff with alecs, and started running. Alec realized that the hill was much more enjoyable when he was not the one running up and down it. he made magnus run suicides up the hill, made him kick and punch, it was two hours by the time he called time. Magnus walked over soaked in sweat and leaned on the railing 

“I already hate this” he panted. He sat down on the side walk below him and alec had to laugh

“its been two hours, just wait until the training really starts” magnus closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the railing, trying to catch his breath. Alec sat down beside him. he’s sure they looked crazy sitting their like that but he didn’t care “want to get some food” he said while standing up, he offered magnus a hand up which he took. 

“absolutely”

They ended up going to this vegan place alec liked to hit up when he was training and they both got a salad to go, alec wanting to go back to their apartment to go over the plan he had sorta created. Magnus looked appalled at the salad when it was time to actually eat it

“god must have been having a rough day when he created these” he took a bit slowly. It was funny to watch people cut weigh, but only if you understood it. food becomes a dream almost, alec remembered having full blown dreams about cheese. You heard me right, cheese. Your hatred of all things green became very real very quickly, and you soon would murder your family in cold blood for a piece of bread. 

“well get used to them” he said while pulling out his note book. Magnus sat down in front of him on the floor

“what is our game plan?” he sighed, magnus was going to hate this 

“well you better start liking tea a lot more cause it’s going to be your only enjoyment in life” magnus nodded his head “and starting tomorrow we need to start water, you know how that works so tomorrow we can go shopping and grab a water jug” the deal with the water was that in order to cut water weight you had to have a crazy amount of water in your system, so the goal was to drink at lest five liters a day everyday “other than that im still trying to sort out a set food plan, training will be like normal but with more clinch” magnus took another bit of his salad 

“sounds like a plan” alec picked at his food

“the only way we have a chance is if you change the game and the only way to do that is for you to follow everything, I say okay? When we step through the doors at the gym I’m not your boyfriend anymore, I’m your coach, and at the end of the day we need to leave it all at the gym and not let it follow us home” he had thought about It all day, maybe, just maybe they had a chance if they could keep their two lives separate “it’s the only we get to make It out of this” magnus got up and moved so he was sitting beside him 

“I promise” he said while sticking out his pinky figure. Alec turned away, not able to keep the smile off his face. When they were young, they used to pinky promise about everything from dinner to promises they thought they would never break, he had forgotten about it until he looked at magnus. He locked his pinky with magnus’ locking eyes as though in challenge. 

“good” 

Magnus moved in, alec meeting him half way in a kiss that alec wanted to remember forever. He didn’t want to ever leave the moment they were in as he knew they were about to become numbered, moments like this were they could just be.  
He pulled back slightly, moving his hand to his hair. He wanted to take it all in, memorize every detail that he possibly could, he feeling of hold him near breaths away. he loved this person more then he knew how to say and he was actively helping him destroy himself. What a life

“ill see you on the other side” he sat back against the wall taking a bit of his own salad that he personally thought tasted pretty good. He was as ready as he was ever going to be. 

That’s how they spent the night. Sitting on the kitchen floor eating salads and drinking water, talking about anything they could think of that didn’t involve the fight. Although no one had to be at the gym tomorrow they both knew that tomorrow was the start. He thought to his meeting with Dom, how it gave him a sliver of hope that they might be able to figure something out. Sadly, the night couldn’t live on forever and before he knew it they were lying in bed, magnus arm wrapped around his waist. they could do this. they had to 

The next morning, he was the first to wake. He had to meet Dom early in the morning before he went to talk to simon. He made sure to get up as slowly as he could as to not wake magnus. He got ready quickly, making sure to leave a note saying he was going to meet up with simon and do some shopping. He decided not to tell him about Dom, not yet anyways, not until he knew if the guy was for real. He left the note by the bed, leaning over to kiss his forehead quick. His heart hurt at the way magnus smiled. He grabbed his bag before opening up the door, but he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the hallway. On the floor in front of their door was a single piece of paper. Slowly he bent down to read it

“YOU CANT SAVE HIM”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooo what do you guys think about this new information? a note on cutting weight: some people can really drop ten pounds over night and some people can't. I train with a guy who lost fifteen pounds of water weight over night (he ran in a sunna) and I train with another guy who just can't cut weight to save his life and last time he tried to cut that much weight almost ended up in the hospital because he didn't eat for four days, cutting weight is a horrible part of the sport but it is a real thing that us fighters do alot, the most I have cut is ten pounds over night and it was horrible, anyways so that's why Magnus has problems cutting weight when Alec dosent  
> I hope you guys are enjoying this story so far!! please leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed!! thank you so much!


	6. SIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys sorry this is late I had law exams all week and I didn't have anytime to post stuff!! this chapter is kinda cute but very important!!!! anyways I hope you guys are enjoying this story and thank you so much for your support

You can’t save him. 

He stared at the paper in his hands, he couldn’t move. It was a single piece of paper that had the power to stop his lungs from moving and his brain from thinking.

You can’t save him.

Someone knew where they were, someone knew where he lived. He thought back to the party, all the people he had never meet before but somehow knew him or magnus. It could have been anyone, anyone could have told Al where they were. He could hardly think over the sound of his heart beating, he felt the anxiety he had been trying to force down come out all at once. He sat down against the door, trying to breath. It would be so easy to just fall back inside the door, to run up the stairs and collapse onto the bed where magnus was sleeping. But he couldn’t. Magnus couldn’t not know about this, or the threat from Jonathan, if he knew then he couldn’t train and if he doesn’t train then…he cut himself off, the growing line of thought only making his throat close tighter. He made a fist with his hand over and over again, trying to force his mind to stop panicking. He couldn’t move the hand that held the note, as if it carried some power that left him frozen. 

“you’re okay” he said to himself over and over again. “he’s okay” he thought of magnus safe behind locked doors, safely inside where the world couldn’t touch him. he didn’t want to leave, he wanted to sit outside of it like a guard to make sure he would be okay but that wouldn’t save him. the best thing he could do was figure out how to make him win this fight. He swore to himself in front of any god who cared to listen: he was going to save him, or he was going to die trying.   
He took a few more breaths until the world stopped spinning and he started to come back to himself. He needed to go if he was going to meet Dom but his limbs fought with him every step of the way. Slowly he stood, letting himself lean against the wall till he was steady. He put the note in his pocket and took one last look at the door before walking away. 

He walked to the coffee shop but his mind stayed on the floor of the apartment. 

You can’t save him.

someone knew where he lived which meant their safe place was no longer safe. He didn’t even realize it when he made it to the coffee shop and was sitting down. he needed to talk to simon but he had to do this first. The best thing he could do for magnus now was to have a plan for him and he couldn’t do it alone. It wasn’t long before Dom was walking in. alec stood up to meet him

“hey thanks a lot for taking the time to meet with me” he said holding out a hand. 

“no problem at all, I was already in this part of town”

They sat down, alec got out the note book he brought with him 

“you’re really saving my ass” he opened the page with all of the information about the fight on it

“tell me what you need help with” dom orders a coffee while sitting back in his chair

“alright, I have a fighter who is currently sitting at 147, and I need him to be 130 in four weeks” he looked over the page one more time before looking up at dom “it would be no problem if he was able to cut weight but he has a really hard time with it so we need a real plan” Dom looked at him as though in thought

“why on earth would he take this fight?” it was a fair question

“its complicated, let’s just say there is no way around it, what’s you advice?” 

They spent the next couple hours going through a list of things they should and shouldn’t do. They were going to cut out wheat, dairy and most sugars, high protein low carb but still enough that he could work out. Lunch was going to be the biggest meal of the day, dinner and breakfast smaller. The water cut was still going to work the same way, it was the one thing they agreed on

“this should work, send me updates or if something is going wrong” he gave alec his phone number and hesitated. “im sorry, there is something I’ve got to know” alec gave him a questioning look. He liked dom and he didn’t want him to say something that was going to screw it up “we are talking about Magnus Bane, right?”  
Alec stopped in his thoughts, how… 

“how…” how did this guy know? who was he talking to. Alec was ready to bolt when Dom put his hands up

“I swear I’m not stalking you guys or anything like that, all I did was google you last night to make sure you were going to murder me” that would have been a good idea alec realized. He should have done that too. That still didn’t explain how he knew it was magnus, it could be any fighter hes training “I saw what happened in Florida, and then I fell down a rabbit hole of clubs and things and I saw that another club had an add about a fight in Florida with magnus and I just sorta connected the dots, was I right?” alec just stared at him, not sure weather or not to be scared or amazed at what this guy had found out over simple google

“you found all that out from google?” he wondered what else people where finding out, how much was available from the internet. Its not like he thought the things that happened in Florida would stay there, its just that he forgets sometimes that the biggest moment of his life had been broadcasted across the whole world

“yeah, and can I just say that what you did in Florida, I think it was the more honorable thing you could have done, and what a huge step for the community” alec let his shoulders drop slightly at the feedback, realizing that he was safe for a second from hate

“I wish more people would think that” he said under his breath. Now was not the time for that “your right, It is Magnus” he almost didn’t want to say it, magnus name something sacred, something he didn’t want to let anyone else hear. Dom sat back in his chair

“this should work” he gave him a kind smile “and if it doesn’t then we will figure something else out” alec had no idea why this stranger who he literally ran into the day before was being so nice to him but he figured he needed as many people on his side right now as he could 

“what did the add about the fight in Florida say?” alec was not even aware it had been posted yet, they had just come to the terms of the fight, how could al already be promoting something that he dident even have the photos for? 

“it was just an announcement post that his top fighter was going to be taking on his son in Florida, there was not a lot of information but enough that I could put the pieces together” of course he was trying to get some hype about it, about the fight and what it was. he was going to paint magnus as the ungrateful son who disrespected not only his father but the entire community, the entire gym. Magnus was about to become the bad guy in a very big way. Alec had no idea how many people knew the full story or who al had talked to, anyone could have left the note outside of his door. the note that currently felt like it was burning a hole in his pocket. He couldn’t stop thinking about it, even Dom started talking about something alec didn’t understand, he thought about it, about who it could have been. 

“hey im sorry but I need to go” he got up, suddenly needing to talk to simon. Dom gave him a nice smile before standing up 

“no worries, you have my number so let me know how this works and if we need to change anything” alec gave him a nod

“I will, thank you again” and with that he was out the door

By the time he arrived at Simons apartment he was overwhelmed with anxiety over who it could be and how many people now knew about the fight. It was different when only the four of them knew but now it was out there for the whole world to see it was anyone’s game. He had not been to Simons place in years but the walk there was still the same, the route edged into his brain forever. He went up to the fourth floor, the wall paper was still ripped in the same places it always way, it still smelt like mold which was probably not the greatest thing but it was the normalist thing. When he got to the door he only had to knock once before Simon was opening the door. he was expecting him 

“ what’s happened?” he says as alec walks through the doors. He is taken back by the sight of it all and just how familiar it was. his whole life was different now, everything about it had changed but this one thing was the same, this one thing was a piece of his old life he never thought he would see again. he sat down on the same stool he used to drink the night away on and let his shoulders drop. Simon sat down in front of him “whats happened alec, magnus is not really going to fight Jonathan right?” so Simon had heard too. It made sense that he would know, he used to train there and was still friends with the fighters. Alec nodded his head

“he is.” Simons eyes went wide but he nodded

“how are you doing with that?” it was the first time someone had asked him that question since this whole thing began and he was thankful for it 

“not awesome, Simon I think this is bigger then either of us think it is, I think he has already lost” he put his head down, thinking about the note

“what do you mean?” alec reached and pulled the note out 

“this was on my door step this morning. And the first day back to the gym Jonathan told me to watch my back. What if its right, what if I can’t do it” he watched Simon read the words, and then read them again. he knew Simon was just as scared as alec was, magnus was his best friend too, had been his whole life. “I can’t lose him Simon” there was something that magnus was not telling him, a piece that he had not yet found out and whatever it was it was bigger than he could understand. 

“what did magnus say about it?”

“I haven’t told him; he needs to focus on training if he has any chance” 

“alec from this sounds of it this is not about the fight, this is Al trying to hurt you, trying to hurt both of you, magnus should know better then to get caught up in all of this stuff and for what—” Simon looked like he was trying to figure out a puzzle that he too was missing a piece of, until suddenly he wasn’t “damn it” he said it under his breath like alec was not supposed to hear him

“what?” simon looked at him like he knew he had the power to change everything “simon what is it?”

“he didn’t take this fight because of his dad. He took his fight because of Jonathan” alec looked at him, not understanding how the two pieces fit together 

“I don’t—”

“cant you see? magnus got so caught up in his drama with jonathan that he stoped thinking about what mattered, he took the fight because he couldn’t let him win and in doing so he is sacrificing everything that mattered, he’s being an idiot” he still did not understand how it worked. He knew that Jonathan was the guy magnus kissed in the bar but they had both been drunk, to drunk to know what was happening. He knew that magnus punched him outside the bar and that was the end of it

“I don’t get it, why would he take the fight because of Jonathan?” the two sides where not connecting in his brain. Simon seemed to realize slowly, his face changing 

“he never told you did he” it was not a question; it was a statement. 

“tell me what!” he was getting really tired of this game. Simon sighed 

“I need you not to react okay?” he nodded his head. He could feel the anxiety growing in throat at Simons hesitation. A part of him had already guessed what he was about to say but hearing the words out loud might kill him. simon took a deep breath 

“okay. That night in the bar was a mistake, magnus was so drunk that I doubt he remembered his own name, but Jonathan wasn’t, he knew exactly what he was doing,” alec had guessed that much, but there was more, there had to be “and magnus did in fact punch him in the face after you left, but that was not where it ended. He was destroyed alec, he drank himself silly, locked himself in his apparent for days, even put himself in the hospital once or twice” the words felt like a knife to his chest when he thought of all the pain he had put him through “but after a while it changed. We saw you on TV making a name for yourself in the fight world, He became so mad at you because you looked so happy and he was not, he was mad at you and at the world, he became self-destructive and cruel, he was so mad at you alec” it was fair, but it still hurt “he did everything he could to prove he was over it, so he called Jonathan” alec held his breath, wishing that the next sentence would not have to be spoken “he called Jonathan and the next thing I knew they were making out on my couch and making a name for themselves as a couple, he wanted everyone to know he had moved on from you. of course, I heard how he cried at night, and how he still drank until he could barely move, but he wanted people to believe he was doing great like you were. I told him it was a bad idea but he dident listen to me,” it felt like someone had punched all the air out of his lungs, he didn’t know what to say “It started as a way to prove he was happy but I think for a second he was, or at lest was the closest thing to happy that I had seen him since you. they fell into a new normal and I think at lest a part of him was moving on with him, but he wasn’t you,” 

“how long” he said, his voice less firm then he wanted it to be

“they were on and off for almost three years. That is until he realized his fighter was going to be fighting yours, and that he was going to have to spend the weekend with you. whatever part of him that had tried to move on was gone the second he heard your name. even though it was almost five years later, the second you came back into the picture whatever he had with Jonathan was over because he was not you, he loves you alec, he never loved Jonathan” they had been together before Florida, had been together less than a year ago. Magnus had moved on with someone else, the person who ruined them to begin with. Suddenly things started to fit into place. The times magnus would not come back to the room until the latest hours of the night, the looks they exchanged that hinted at more, all of these things that alec had thought meant nothing now meant everything. they had been together as long as they had been. Why dident magnus tell him. simon waited for a response but when one never came he sighed 

“he never once looked at Jonathan the way he looks at you.” he couldn’t stop thinking of Florida. 

“when we were in Florida, were they together?” he dident want to hear the words, dident want to hear something he could not unhear. 

“no” he said it fast, like he needed alec to hear it “no they weren’t, magnus had walked away months before then” months were nothing. Alec didn’t know what to think or what to feel. Why hadn’t he told him any of this, why had he told him it ended that night at the bar. “I know this is hard to hear, but you need to focus of what’s important, magnus took the fight in order to prove something to Jonathan, which means he is going to fight with his emotions instead of his skill. People get hurt when they let their emotions get in the way alec, they know that, Al must know that. its why they think he is going to lose. They think he is going to let him emotions play into it, you cant let him” alec could barely comprehend what he was saying, still trying to understand magnus and Jonathan as a couple., doing all the things that him and magnus do now. He wondered if they ever went on real dates, if they all hung out with simon and his friends the way they did on Saturday nights, if he made him laugh or if he knew magnus story the way alec did. He could not stop picturing jonathans hands on magnus. He had thought it was hate magnus was feeling towards him but it wasn’t.

“why would he think magnus would get in the ring and freeze? He got in the ring with me and took out my ribs without a problem” he said it harsher then he wanted to, but he couldent stop it

“alec now your not thinking clearly” simon gave him his most sympathic smile “if you think It was easy for him then your wrong, the only reason he was able to do that was because you were okay with it, because he thought it was the only way to protect you, this is different, they are going for blood this time. Al is going to have more up his sleeve but he is hopping to stop magnus in his tracks before he goose for the kill, you need to make sure he is not phased by it” alec puts the pieces together and realizes the real danger they are in, that magnus is in and no matter how much his head is spinning he knows that somethings are more important 

“how do I do that simon?” he doesn’t know how to do this

“talk to him, make sure he knows what he is doing, I don’t care alec but you need to do this” simon was looking at him like he had the fate of the world resting on his shoulders, which he guessed he kinda did. He didn’t have a choice to fail, he had to win. 

“okay” he didn’t want to talk about it one bit, he didn’t want to have to look magnus in the face and face the past and what he did, what magnus did. He didn’t want to confront him about the fact that he had been dating Jonathan less then a year prior because he didn’t think he would be able to say the words without the anger and betrayal spilling out his lips

“why dident he tell me” he said. It was a confession that was made up of all his insecurities. Did magnus not trust him? was he ashamed to admit it? there had to be reason why. Was magnus as drunk as he wanted them all to think he was that night? 

“because he didn’t want you to think all the things you were thinking right now” why had he said it ended with a punch, why had he taken the fight if he had a past? How the fuck did they end up in this situation again. alec had so many questions that he knew he would never get the answers to, he didn’t know what the feeling in his chest was but it threatens to drown him. he wanted to scream

“we talked about it in Florida, he said that it was nothing but a drunk kiss, that it ended with a punch why would he not tell me the full story?” he has asked him about Jonathan and he had told him it was nothing.

“would you have stayed if he told you?” he was going to respond but the words died in his throat because he didn’t know. he had spent five years thinking magnus had been cheating on him with some random guy, he had thought through all the situations and how happy he probably was to be rid of alec. He knew he could not have been farther from the truth but that same insecurity was there. he didn’t want to admit It but he was not sure what he would have done if magnus had told him the truth. “exactly, people do questionable things when they are desperate” alec could not help his mind from going places he didn’t want it to go. Did magnus love Jonathan, even for a minute was it real? Was fighting going to bring those feelings back like it did for them? he could not stop the grief he felt when he imagined magnus with someone else, of losing him to someone who was once his best friend, it was more then he could bare. A part of him thought they made more sense, Jonathan looked the part of who magnus should be with, not him. he thought back to everything they had been through and couldn’t help but think about what stuff magnus and Jonathan had been through too. As if simon could hear his thoughts he put a hand on his knee

“buddy I know this is a lot and I know your spiraling right now but don’t let it go there. I have never seen two people more disgustingly in love then you too, he loves you man, don’t let Jonathan get in your head” simon gave him a reassuring smile which alec returned. Even though he dident believe it

“thank you simon, really” Simon got up to get a drink

“don’t thank me yet” 

Alec didn’t go home for awhile, he dident know how to look at magnus without seeing Jonathan. Instead he hung out with Simon and they watched old movies alec had not seen in years and ate junk food because he was eating his feelings at a professional level. But eventually the sun went down and he had to go home, he remembered how upset magnus had been when he dident come home before and no matter how upset he was he couldn’t do that to him again. 

“I should get going” he said into the loud noise of the movie. Simon presses pause 

“don’t be to hard on him” alec nodded while going to the door before quickly saying goodbye.

It was later than he wanted It to be when he finally got back but he knew that magnus would still be up, he always waiting for him it was a rule of there’s that went back years. 

“magnus?” he said when he entered the apartment. Unlike the night before the lights where on, music filled the space. He looked around until he spotted magnus sitting on the kitchen table eating what looked like a bowl of spinach. He turned around when he heard alec 

“here!” he said through a mouth full of food. Alec didn’t look at him as he walked over, not sure how he would react to seeing him after everything he had talked about with simon. But when he was standing in front of him everything he thought he would say died in his throat. Because magnus wasn’t with Jonathan, he was sitting on alecs counter wearing a hoodie that had his name on it. 

“where did you go—”

Before he could finish his words alec was kissing him. his hands moved to the side of his face to keep him from moving away, magnus made a sound of surprise but didn’t fight it. he needed him close. Suddenly he was no longer angry, a new emotion that he could name filled his chest instead, something that threaten to consume him if he thought about it too long. Magnus moved his arms so they were around his waist. Although he tried the thoughts of losing him, of him realizing that Jonathan is really a better fit for him wouldn’t stop filling his mind. He moved back a little to catch his breath, moving his arms so that they were around his neck 

“why?” he said although it came out more like a whisper. Magnus didn’t seem to understand and he looked at him with surprise

“why what?” he could feel him rubbing circles on his sides, something alec was not even he knew he was doing. he moved back far enough that he could see his eyes

“why did you chose me?” he wasn’t sure why he said it, it was not like him to act so desperate but once the words were said he couldn’t breath until he heard the answer. Magnus looked at him a moment before sitting up a little straighter, he moved one hand up to cup the side of his face

“because It wasn’t simply a matter of choosing you, it’s a matter of choosing myself” he kissed him softly, alec didn’t understand, he waited for magnus to say more. “you give me the power to be someone that im proud of. Someone who is allowed to be weak or unsure, someone who can be kind, I don’t have to worry about saying to much or speaking to loud. you make me want to be better then who I was raised to be because I want to be someone that you are proud of,” he kissed his jaw “because you are like this amazing hero who swooped in and saved me, you’re the best person I know,” alec couldn’t think of anything else then how the words looks on his lips. “ you see it was never a choice. once I saw you, it didn’t matter if it was five years ago or Florida or even five seconds ago, I was yours for better or for worse. If being with you is a choice then it’s the easiest choice I’ve ever made, that I will continue to make every single day” alec met his lips this time. He knew that he would never love anyone else the way he loved magnus in that moment, he knew that magnus loved him too. Whatever happened was the past because right here and right now magnus is choosing him and is kissing him with everything he has.

“god I love you” alec says against his lips. He knew they would have to talk about Jonathan at some point, that it would be a hard conversation but he couldn’t help feeling a little better about it now than he did before. Maybe, just maybe they would be able to win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Magnus dated Jonathan!!!! what a twist. what do you guys think about that? as always leave your predictions or thoughts in the comments and leave kudos if you enjoyed it! thank you!!


	7. SEVEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!! ah I'm sorry this is so late and the chapter is not the best but I got caught up in exams and scholarship stuff and I just didn't have time to do this. this chapter is not the best and its pretty short but I promise the next one will be amazing. something you need to know is that this takes place 2 months after the last one

t took two months before magnus got sick. It was really a ticking time bomb because he was training himself to the point of passing out, Doms meal plan was working but it was taking everything. they had tried to adjust it but this was the only way he could lose the weight. it killed alec to see him like that, to have to push him when all he wanted to do was hold him. but they had gotten into a sort of routine, a new way of living. After the night alec found out about Jonathan, he had chosen not to bring it up, instead he let it live in the back of his mind. He wanted to be okay with it, he wanted to be able to move on and accept that the past is the past but he couldn’t. He wanted to talk about it, to hear the words from magnus mouth but he couldn’t get himself to bring it up. instead he fought that war in private. The fight is now months away and soon a press conference will be held 

The first thing alec realized when he woke up was that magnus was on fire beside him. his hand runs over his face, the touch only confirming his early thoughts. He let his eyes drift over his form, saw the blankets alec had been missing all night tightly wounded around him.

“magnus” he said softly, slightly shaking his shoulder. Magnus hummed in response, pulling the blanket tighter around his neck “I need you to wake up” alec said. Magnus moved so   
that he was on his back, eyes slowly opening before shutting tightly

“mmhm head” he said. Alec placed his hand on his forehead

“your burning up” he kept his voice soft, not letting in the sight panic. Magnus never got sick

“fucking Simon” magnus said roughly. Alec laughed. Simon had come down with an awful flu over the last couple of weeks, alec had told magnus to stay away from him but of course he didn’t listen, insisting that getting sick was only for the weak. And now here they were

“I told you so” he got up to grab a couple of Tylenol for the fever and head, along with a cold cloth, putting the kettle on as he went. When he returned magnus looked like a child all bundled up in blankets, hair going ever direction imaginable. He sat on the edge of the bed to give him the pills and a glass of water which he took willingly. Alec went to move closer but before he could magnus had crawled over to place he head firmly on alecs lap. He put the cold cloth on his forehead, running a hand through his hair. Although he saw it coming it didn’t mean that he liked seeing magnus sick, especially when he knew deep down that he would still have to train 

“is there anything I can do to help you right now?” he asked

“just hold me” he said. Magnus was always more cat like then human when he was sick. Alec pulled magnus up so that he was sitting in his lap, head resting on his shoulder. He ran a hand over his back. Hopefully the medication would start working its magic soon. He grabbed his phone from the night stand, careful not to disturb magnus. he opened his text

“hey dad, magnus is really sick, wont make gym today” and his send. It took less than a second for his phone to light up with a call from him. 

“I have to take this” he said quietly. He tried to keep his voice soft as not to hurt his head. Magnus shock his head in disapproval but didn’t have the energy to fight as alec gently moved him. he kissed the top of his head before running out of the room

“hey” he said while opening the door to the apartment

“he has to train today alec” his dads voice was firm

“dad, hes really sick” he remembered all the days that he had to train while sick, how many times he had to pause the drills to throw up. 

“I don’t care. This is what the sport is alec, be his coach and get him down here” he sighed, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to win this one. 

“fine, but only for an hour”

“for as long as I want him here” he hung up the phone. he hated this part of the sport. He thought back to magnus laying in bed, he had no idea how he was going to be able to train.   
He walked back inside

“magnus” he said softly. He was sitting up now

“what time do we have to go?” he sounded awful. His voice was broken and nose was plugged. Alec walked over to sit beside him.  
“whenever we get there, but don’t over do it today okay?” magnus rest his head on his shoulder  
“I got this” he said. Alecs not sure either of them really believed it

It was two hours later by the time they got out of the house. Alec had made magnus take every kinda flue and cold medicine that he could find along with as much tea as they could drink. Magnus seemed more human by the time they got to the gym, the cold air mixed with the drugs clearing his head a little bit 

“magnus, im glad you made it” his dad said when they walked in the door. magnus gave him a thumbs up before putting down his stuff. Alec walked over to his dad 

“nice and light today” his dad brushed him off. At first alec had been trying to train magnus by himself, but he had quickly realized that he really had no idea how to do that and recruited his dad to help him, soon his dad had basically taken over the entire thing other then the food part. That was alec and Doms job  
The session started out slow to his request, alec put on a pair of shorts to train with him as he did sometimes. They started off with running, then sprints and bag work. He saw magnus close his eyes every now and then. Problem to stop the world from spinning. Alec dident get involved though, he had to be his coach right now, not a concerned for his safety boyfriend. Still, his heart broke a little bit each time he saw magnus lean on the wall or sway on his feet. They moved on to pad work, alec sitting it out in order to watch and   
make sure his foot work was good and he was moving correctly. 

“you need to focus” his dad said to magnus who had just taken a head shot. Magnus nodded his head before putting his hands up. it was not great to say the lest. He was missing punches and taking more then he should have, he was slow and unpracticed, It was bad. Eventually Rob backed away “there is no point in continuing with this, go sprint” magnus put his gloves down before he broke out running. His dad moved over to him 

“so hes actually sick” he said. Alec dident take his eyes off of magnus, making sure he was alright when he slowed down for a moment 

“hes actually sick yes”

“well lets see how far we can go today” alec wanted to protest, the better, human side of him wanted to call bullshit and take him home right now but he still knew he couldn’t, this   
was the sport they did.

After magnus was done running sprints he did some shadow boxing, then hit more rounds of pads, then did some bag work. Alec watched him, no longer training in case magnus needed him. alec sees himself when he had the flue when he passed out on the matts from the fever. When his da signaled a lunch break, alec went over to where magnus was sitting on the floor

“are you okay?” he said. He sat down in front of him

“doesn’t matter if im not” he said. Alec hated seeing him like this, seeing his eyes glassy and grey. He put a hand on the side of his face, a comfort that magnus willing leaned into. Alec didn’t like to show physical contact in the gym very much as he was still trying to earn the respect back from his peers but when magnus looked like he did right now there were different rules

“if you want to go we can go, its okay” magnus closed his eyes against alecs palm, taking comfort in the contact 

“its okay” alec moved to find some food, making magnus eat something so he would not pass out. Alec was sure he wouldn’t make it more then a couple hours before calling it quits, but he admired him for trying. People may think they were being cruel by making him do this, by not just letting him have the day off but it was the world they lived in. they had to know how to train and work through things while being sick and feeling like death, because what if you felt like that while fighting? You had to know how to work through it without breaking. Even though sometimes you wanted to die while it was happening. But magnus kept going. To everyone’s surprise he kept going it was closer to dinner then to lunch. Maybe it was because he had something to prove, because he wanted to prove to everyone around him that he could do it, but not even he could go on forever. They were hitting rounds of pads. Alec was standing off to the side, once again watching him like he had done before. He saw him sway on his feet. He knew he must fell like something close to death, the pills had long since worn off. Magnus missed a punch, then another one. he saw his dad get angry, tell him he wasn’t paying attention, but magnus was not listening anymore, he was looking at rob but he was not seeing him 

“dad, I think its time to call it quits” he said walking over to magnus, when he saw his face he knew he had let it go on for too long. Although he had been working out for hours his face was pale, his eyes were dark. He put a arm around his waist and felt magnus lean into him, placing his own arm around alec for support. It was a moment of weakness, of vulnerability. He knew magnus was done because otherwise he never would have hid his face in alecs neck if he wasn’t, especially in front of the people of the gym, in front of alecs dad. But there they were. Alec tightened his arm around him protectively 

“hes almost done alec” his dad said. There was a challenge in his voice, one that alec would not back down to. He knew that this is all his dad knew and that he was being a coach, and if it were any other person, some random fighter that he had only seen from the gym, if it were any of those people he wouldn’t care, he would have felt bad for them sure but he would not have stepped in. but this wasn’t some random fighter, this was magnus and they might be having some problems right now and alec might not be able to think of the past without Jonathan tainting the imagine, no matter all of that because it was still magnus, he would not let this continue.  
“hes done, we are going home.” Magnus didn’t even try to fight him, didn’t even get mad that alec was speaking for him, instead he just took off his gloves and returned to alecs side. 

“your not doing him any favors by leaving” his dad was mad and alec knew it. he was undermining him as a coach right now which was something his dad could not tolerate, but he dident care

“I don’t care” alec walked away with magnus beside him over to wear their bags were. He sat magnus down while he gathered their stuff 

“im sorry” magnus said. His voice was wrong. Alec looked up at him confused before realizing that he felt bad he couldn’t finish

“don’t you dare apologize, im sorry I let this go on for so long, we should have just stayed home” it was messed up to get sick while training because you ended up actually feeling guilty over the fact that you were sick, like somehow to chose to get sick and to feel like crap, it was messed up enough that even alec could see it

“how are you?” he said, he put a hand to his forehead, of course he was on fire. 

“wonderful” magnus said in response. Alec got up first, then helped magnus up after, making sure to hold onto him strongly. He turned around and saw his dad giving him a   
disappointed look, he just turned around and walked out the door

By the time they got back to their apartment it was the early evening and magnus was doing shitty., the second they got inside alec walked them over to the couch where magnus promptly fell over. He maneuvered him so that he was lying down, properly, moved the pillows and blankets around untill he was comfortable 

“im going to get you some drugs” he said while walking over to the bathroom. Magnus hummed in responses. He grabbed the pills along with a glass of water and sat down on the edge of the couch. “here” he said, trying to make his voice as soft as possible. Magnus sat up and took the meds. When he was back down alec ran a hand through his hair. He was a little concerned about the fever that magnus had had and was hopping the meds would be able to take It away. Alec got up to grab something but magnus grabbed his hand

“Stay” he said. Alec knew no one liked to be alone when they were sick. He himself would had anxiety attacks when he got sick and was left alone. He laughed a little bit at magnus   
before sitting down. magnus moved so that his head was in alecs lap like it was that morning. he ran a hand through magnus hair while grabbing whatever book magnus had been reading from the counter beside him. magnus would go from reading stupid romance books to philosophy to classic literature you never knew what you would get when he brought home a new book. The current one seemed to be some sort of analytical paper on something called The Iliad. He opened to the page that was book marked and could barely understand five words 

“how do you read this” he said, looking down at magnus who smiled

“easy, try” he was falling asleep, alec sighed before giving it his best shot

“….in the second book of the iliad…” and so it went., turned out it was not as hard as he had first thought to understand and once he started reading it he started to like it. he himself was not familiar with the text but he knew magnus was, he knew magnus had read countless books on the subject so he kept reading until it was too dark in the apartment to see the words, and when that happened he put it down and thought about it. he thought about heros and monsters, gods and mortals, before he knew he found himself closing his eyes. He thought about god like Achilles and the humanity that killed him, or hector tamer of horses who just wanted the best for his family. Soon enough sleep took over him 

It dident last long. He was awoken by magnus shaking in his lap, sweat drenching his clothes. Alec panicked for a second before checking his forehead, it was like fire. He took a breath, he needed to stay calm. He gently moved so that magnus was on the couch and he was siting on the floor beside it

“magnus, you need to wake up baby” he shook his shoulder, trying to stop the shaking, he needed to break the fever. Training while fighting always resulted in a fever alec thought. magnus stirred under him 

“so cold” he said. That was not good

“I know love but we need to cool you down even more” alec didn’t use pet names very much, but any time he was nervous or concerned they just kinda slipped out. He got up and ran to the bathroom quickly drawing a cold bath, he knew magnus would hate it but he didn’t know how else to stop the fever. He ran back to him magnus still in the same position

“alec” magnus said, he knew he was feeling like actually death, alec wanted to take it all away 

“im right here, its gonna be fine” he had never been happier that his dad made him carry around 250-pound heavy bags to clinch train because it meant when he went to pick up magnus who was not even close to that it was nothing. Magnus held onto his neck as alec walked them over to the bath 

“im sorry about this” he said. He kissed the side of his head before helping him into the bath. Magnus protested at first, shaking and swearing but soon he relaxed into. Alec sat on the edge on the bathtub, making sure he was alright. He held his hand and ran circles over the skin there. he didn’t really know what to do, so they both sat there until the shaking had stopped and alec was certain that he would not die anymore. He put a hand to his forehead and was relived to find it had cooled down significantly. He went to their closet to find some new clothes for both of them before returning. He helped magnus stand up and get out of the wet clothes and into new ones. Instead of returning to the couch which was still soaked with sweat, instead they went upstairs to their real bed. He put magnus down and got him settled before grabbing for his phone. it was 4am, early enough for people to be awake. Even though he knew his dad would not be up for another ahour he sent him a text 

“we will not be at gym today, no dissection” they were going to have a sick day, alec would make sure of it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> our poor boy is sick!! I know this chapter kinda sucked but I promise the next one will be good. and for anyone asking yes training when you are sick is really horrible, I have passed out and thrown up and had to go to the hospital from training when I had the flew so I related to Magnus right now haha, the next chapter will be a good one son hope you stay toned!! thank you all so much for supporting this story and leave kudos or comments if you enjoyed


	8. EIGHT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!! its been way to long since i updated this but i got busy with some life stuff, funny enough i was training for a fight myself!! but im back and good as new (only slightly broken from the fight) the world is a crazy place right now and i hope you all are staying safe!!! enjoy this chapter!!

It took a couple of days before alec woke up one morning to find Magnus feeling more like himself, the color slowly returning to his face. It was easy to remember the time that he had come down with the worst flu of his life and had trained until he passed out, later that night he had ended up in the hospital with an unbreakable fever. He ran a hand over his forehead before care fulling sitting up, desperately not wanting to wake up the sleeping figure beside him who hadn’t been able to truly sleep all night. He checked his phone and saw the missed calls from his dad but didn’t care, there were something more important then the gym, then training, Magnus would be there soon enough. With his dad wanting to run drills all day alone because apparently alec is not able to push him hard enough, it left him alone to think, , to truly think about the things he had to learn and discovered, about Jonathan's real place in Magnus past and the note that was seared into his brain. What the fuck were they going to do. He wanted to laugh at how hopeless it all felt. He knew Simon was right. Their secret weapon was the fact that they all knew magnus would not be able to keep his emotions out of the ring, out of the fight and that’s how people died. They were also counting on the fact that alec wouldn’t know about it. There had to be a way around this, there had to be something they could do. He phones Dom to let him know about Magnus flu, and was told to just watch his weight for the next three days and get back to him once things where on track again. He hung up the phone just as magnus was walking towards him wearing gym closes that hung off him perfectly 

“morning,” he said while placing a kiss on his cheek before grabbing a bottle of water

“more like afternoon” he looked at the clock, it was in fact lunch 

“time is only an illusion darling” he sat on top of the counters, looking at the eggs alec was eating with longing before taking a sad sip of water. Alec almost felt bad for him 

“your feeling better yeah?” he asked. Yesterday had been the best day, no fevers or shakes, just magnus being magnus and asking his about what his concept of life was. It was good   
to have him back 

“good as new” alec stood up and walked over to him, taking mercy in the feeling of magnus arms around his neck. This was the only time when his racing mind slowed down enough for him to breath. His lips found there way to magnus, letting the stress of their lives slip away

“then you should have no problems with my dads hell today” he says against his lips. Magnus moves back with wide eyes

“want to repeat that?” 

“my dad says its time to stop laying around, sounds like you have quite the work out ahead of you” his dad had called it bootcamp but that seemed to civil, magnus was in for the hardest work out of his entire life. Alec ignore the thought that he would give up a lot in order to be the one having to train, that it felt like he was missing an arm or a leg, that sometimes the grief he felt every time a promoter didn’t call was enough to drown him. Instead he gave magnus a wicked smile “have fun”

“your not coming?” magnus had not trained much without alec, the gym still being new

“im not allowed, apparently I don’t push you hard enough” he knew it wasn’t exactly true, his dad was just bored and missing the fight as much as alec. Magnus lips were back on his before he could say anything else

“remember me when I am killed by sprints at lest” he laughed but it wasn’t real. He didn’t even want to joke about it

“sure will” magnus jumped off the counter before grabbing his gym bag with a heavy sigh like a child who didn’t want to go to school 

“love you” he says before walking out the door leaving alec alone to sit in the bubble of bliss for a little while longer. Before he could figure out what to do next his phone sent off an text alert, the message made him want to take magnus and leave the country

“lets chat-J”

Jonathan sat at a small table in the coffee shop down the road from his place but far enough away not to give him any indication of where they lived. Although it didn’t seem to matter that much anyways. Alec had no idea what he was doing, none at all but he didn’t know what else to do, the helpless feeling something he has gotten too used to in the past few months. Was it too much to want a break? But it felt more dangerous to ignore the invite then to respond. His skin felt like it might peel off his face when he saw him sitting there in all his glory. He couldn’t stop picturing with magnus, his hands on him, he cant help the thoughts that scream at him it was something real, something like they had. Alec knew there were things magnus wasn’t telling him, things about Jonathan, things about his dad, there were so many things that needed to be said between the two of them yet neither of them wanted to be the first one to say it. 

“Alec, good to see you” he says while alec joins him. 

“what do you want” he tries to keep his voice calm, friendly even at most but he wants to rip him apart piece by piece, he was the reason they were in this situation in the first place. Or maybe he only told himself that to get ride of the guilt that wanted to consume him 

“straight to business as usually” he takes a long sip of his coffee before sitting up a little straighter “im just giving you a little piece of advice” he sounded like he wanted alec to think he was meaner then he was

“why would I listen to anything you say?” he could feel his hands shaking but from nothing but rage. This was the man who had put a spike in his smooth new life

“because neither of us want to see him dead” there was a finality to his voice that sent a cold spell through his entire being. He didn’t know how to take the words. Nothing he said could be trusted

“says the one wanting to fight him” it was cold, anyone who saw the two could feel then tension running off of them

“he was stupid enough to say yes”

“you know why” he didn’t want to say the words, didn’t want to admit out loud what was running through his head but the fond smile that found its way to jonathans face said it all 

“yes I do, im surprised he told you though” alec doesn’t comment, doesn’t make a move. It felt like being locked in a cage with a dangerous animal, making sure ever breath was calculated because you never knew when it was going to strike next. “or he didn’t” his silence was enough of an answer

“its none of yours businesses”

“I supposed not” his eyes are screaming something that alec doesn’t know how to read but his head was spinning, there was more to this then he thought “but I would listen to what im about to tell you” alec sits up a little straighter, bracing himself for what’s to come

“he knows where you live, knows who your friends and family are, knows where you train,” alec takes a sharp breath “I recon you got our little note?” god he just wants this to be over

“what do you want Jonathan, what do you have to gain from this?” it was something he had been wondering, more so now that he knew the truth

“I know something you don’t” he puts his cup down “you and me, we are nothing more then pawns in the game between father and son, what happened in Florida was just another play, but this is it, this is the grand finale to settle the score once and for all.” He was wrong “you don’t know him as well as you think you do, you don’t realize how big this is” he’s wrong, magnus and him were a team in this, on one playing ground

“and what would you suppose that I do about that?”

“what you always do, run. And run fast” the words hit hard. Who the fuck was magnus dad, what was the game they played. He had none magnus for the majority of his life and never knew of this. Of course he knew that him and his dad didn’t get along, that his dad used him like a punching bag and that Florida had been magnus chance to change that, but maybe they were still playing the game with different rules 

“listen you dick, you can tell Al that im not going anywhere” his words were true and strong, they were not going to lose this. The look on his face was almost something despite

“it’s a mistake. This game is theirs not yours alec, you may end up as just another casualty” 

“is that a threat?” he made his voice stronger then it wanted to be

“you’re the reason magnus has something to fight for, take it away and….you get the rest” the fear that overcame him was something different, this was real. 

“why are you helping me?” why was Jonathan sitting here with him 

“because I remember a time when you would have done the same for me” he gets up, leaving some bills on the counter for this drink. Before he can walk out the door he turns   
around one last time “tell magnus Im glad hes feeling better” he walked out the door without looking back

Alec couldn’t move for a second, couldn’t breath. So much information all trying to arrange itself into his mind at the same time but none of it sticking other then the horrify fact that he knew magnus was sick. How on earth did he know that. He knew he should be thinking of his own safety, of the threat Jonathan said more casualty then he should be it doesn’t click, the only thing he can think is that he needs to get to the gym.  
He walks faster than he should, almost running by the time he sees the tall building in his sights, he looks around at the people walking by, trying to notice If any of them seemed out of the ordinary but none of them did. He wants to scream at the world for not being fair, why them. Why did they have to do this but then he thought about the books magnus had been making him read lately about people dying from viruses that the world was to afraid to talk about and felt guilty for cursing the world. The first person he met was jace when he went flying through the doors talking to a girl with long red hair. She looked nice enough

“alec!” jace yelled as he tried to move past them, needing to talk to magnus now before something else happened, he looked around the room to see if he could spot him before being forced to turn around

“jace now’s not the best time” he said though enjoying the sight of his friend

“sure it is, I want you to meet Clary” he said pointing to the small red head beside him

“nice to meet you” he looks back at jace who seems to be a little shocked at alec response “have you seen magnus?” jace rolls his eyes in a amusement kind of way

“think hes upstairs, everything okay—” alec whips around to leave before hearing the end of jaces sentence. Its not that he meant to be rude it was only that it felt like his skin my crawl off his skin if he dident find magnus, the anxiety more real then alec himself was at the moment. He sees people waving at him, saying things he dosent take the time to hear

“what are you doing here?” his dad asks annoyed

“something came up” he dosent wait for a response before running up the stairs. He opens the door to find magnus sitting on the floor, a salad sitting In his lap 

“alec what—” alec dosent wait, the relief spilling out of him making his head spin. He wraps his arms around him as though it could save him, save both of them 

“I have to tell you something” he says quietly. There was no way he was going to tell magnus all of it, not about him knowing about the past or about his own life being threaten though he wanted to more then he could admit, he needed the right time, the right moment. Sitting in a room at the gym was not the place to have that conversation which alec knew would be hard 

“whats going on” magnus says while pulling away. His eyes are full of fear

“I talked to Jonathan today” he says fast, “and a few days ago or a week-I don’t know how long but someone left-left this at the door step” his words are faster then ever, trying to stumble his way through a confession, he pulls the piece of paper out of his pocket to give to magnus who reads it with wide eyes “I wanted to tell you but then you got sick and the time was wrong and I didn’t want you to worry” he looks down and sees his hands are shaking where they lay, suddenly his whole body feeling like it was to fast, to much. 

“you should have told me” his voice is far away like he is putting pieces together that alec cant see.

“I know but I dident and then today jonathan said that they know, they know where we live and who our friends are and where they are and magnus I don’t know what to do” he dosent tell him the rest, not needing to worry him more then he already was. The fear In his chest was to much to handle, fear for him, or magnus for his family, this was to crazy to be real, too insane to be his reality 

“he wont touch them, not until after the fight” the thought of phoning the police came to mind but the thought was gone before it could become anything more. He dident know what role magnus had played in his dads game. Jonathan made it sound like he may be just as guilty as Al for things alec dident want to think about. If the police got involved then it would be over for them both

“magnus what do we do” he was always the strong one, the one who held alec together when he couldent stand on his own, he needed someone to tell him that It was going to be alright, that they were going to get through it because every day their chances seemed to die a little bit more “they knew you were sick” the words are smaller then he wanted them to be, not wanting them to say them out loud for once he did they became real. Someone was watching them, someone they knew and trusted was working against them. It was overwhelming. Magnus hands found their way to alecs face, making him unable to look down 

“im sorry I dragged you into this, im so sorry” it was not what he thought he was going to say, the words doing nothing to stop his pounding heart only created more questions

“tell me the truth magnus” he asks finally, needing to know some version of what they are really up against. He seemed to think about telling him, about spilling his guts before alecs dad is yelling at them from down below. He cant help think of the first time they sat up here. 

“I promise,” his lips are on his in a kiss that says the words he cant get out in a way that for a second makes alecs head stop spinning. “your safe” he says instead, standing up in order to head down the stairs. He knows that whatever he says later will change them for better or for worse.  
He dident want to go home to his quite apartment and sit in his own thoughts of self doubt. Not yet anyways. Instead he sat and watched as magnus trained, the very smell of the gym making him feel safe. He had spend his life inside these walls, no matter how much he wanted to scream the feeling of being inside of them never failed to make him smile. Watching magus worked out helped too. He watched his dad make him run miles of sprints until he was sure magnus was going to throw up, then hit rounds of pads before making him do it all again. The fact the jonathan was out having coffee today with alec instead of busting his ass in the gym made him question how much training he was really doing. Jonathan dident have to cut weight, something that was going to make more of a difference then alec wanted to think about. It was on the edge of darkness before magnus finally walked over to him. Alec wants to laugh when magnus falls against him, the gym most empty. He dosent say anything, just sits in alecs arms like he no longer has the strength to stand. Alec runs a hand through his sweat soaked hair

“your kinda disgusting you know” magnus breath slowly starts to slow down but he makes no effort to move or speak, nodding his head instead. Alec cant help but laugh when his dad walks over with a amused look

“were not done Bane” he feels magnus groan, his dad looks at him like hes waiting for him to step in but he dosent. This is what a fight camp was for

“sorry babe, you’re the one who said you wanted to do this” he pushes himself up, alec and his dad laughing as he gives them both the bird walking to get his gloves once again. The moment was something alec wanted to hold onto, the first time in a while things felt a little normal. It warmed his heart to see magnus and his dad getting along

“im going to head back, get some dinner” he looked towards magnus “please don’t kill him” 

“cant make any promises” there was a smile on his dads face as alec walked away, stopping to place a quick kiss on magnus cheek

“love you” he says in a mocking tone  
“mmhmm” but there is a smile on all of their faces as he leaves, everyone feeling the family tone of the room.

He gets barely ten feet from the gym before he feels eyes on him, the same way you feel when you are walking through a forest. He looks in store windows and sees someone a safe distance away following him like a hawk. He dosent let his fear show. Instead of going home the way he usually dose he instead starts taking side streets and allies, trying to lead the people away but instead not just one, but four people seem to be following him. Think he tells himself. He knows that if it came to a fight he would lose. He also knows that his is what jonathan was warning him about. He puts his hood on trying to blend in but its to late, they already have their eyes set on him. He knows what’s coming, the terror in his chest telling him there was no way of avoiding it. He was suddenly thankful that magnus was safely at the gym behind locked doors and not being hunted with him. He takes a left turn down the side of a building, before turning around to face the people now guarding the exist

“you don’t have to do this” he tries

“but we do” the first one says. If It was one of one then alec wouldn’t have cared but he couldn’t fight four of them

“whatever Al has on you, it dosent have to end this way” he tries again, backing uo until he hit the wall. The one who spoke pulled out a knife before throwing it off to the side, alec dident understand what was happening

“im sorry” the man says, this time moving closer. Alec dident hesitate to throw the first punch, and to his credit it landed perfect. But as usual the man in front of him knew how to take a punch. He though about his already fragile ribs, from Florida that had barely recovered. He saw two of the men move to hold his arms and he through anything he could to get them away but they took the punches as though they were nothing, each one getting brushed off until his hands where being held back by men who were twice his size. It felt like the world was moving in slow motion, his mind suddenly unable to understand what was happening because of the pure fear that blocked him brain. He thought of magnus smile when he walked out of the warm gym, thought of the way he laughed every time alec ran his lips over his neck. There was nothing alec could do to stop this, but he would be damned if Al knew he had been weak

“do your worst you son of a bitch” he spits before the man throughs the first punch. His life is only in pieces after that. One second he is on his feet feeling a mans knuckles split on   
his face, his ribs cracking under the hands of another, the next second he is on the ground feeling like he will never breath another breath. His world is suddenly nothing but pain, so white that it blinds him to everything else, he tries with everything he has to do something, kicking his feet at whatever they can reach but the shots don’t stop, each other doing more damage then the last. He feels his vison spot, but refuses to let it take him. By the time the men had decided either he was dead or close enough he barely knew his own name, only thing he knew for sure was the blood on the ground was his. His vision darkened each time he took a breath and it one last ditch effort he reached for the phone that had been throw to the other side of the narrow street, knowing if he did nothing he would quite possibly die there. 

“alexander you’ve been gone five minutes” he doesn’t get more then a choked word out before he feels himself letting go, the darkness feeling to nice to ignore any longer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whats going to happen to alec? again sorry for disappearing but I hope you all liked this chapter and thank you so much for reading!! leave comments and kudos as always!


	9. NINE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! this is just a short little kinda happy chapter since i think everyone could use some wholesome kinda happy stuff these days, ill post a bigger update on the weekend but here is just a little update!! i hope you guys like it as much as i do

He hears the sounds around him before he knows where he is. The beeping in time with his own heart like a soothing rhyme. To say he was disoriented was an understatement. Slowly he feels his eyes, everything is bright, to bright for him who had gotten so used to the darkness. He looks around, he’s in a hospital room. Why was he— suddenly he’s hit in the face with what happened, looking around at himself to see the bandages and stitches basically holding him together. He got beat up. Him, a top fighter got beat up. It was not his best moment for sure. He looks to his right when he becomes aware of the pressure on his hand only to see magnus asleep against it, he didn’t look much better than alec felt. 

“Magnus,” he says gently, not wanting to spook him, it doesn’t matter, his head shoots up as though he were on fire, looking around for the nurse or doctor who woke him up “its okay” alec says again. He hated how afraid he looked in the moment. Magnus's eyes seem to go wide, like he cant quite believe that alecs alright

“alec” he holds his hand tightly between his, bringing his lips down to place a kiss on his palm. “you okay” he says as though he is trying to convince himself instead of him, alec knew he was okay. 

“im alright” he echoes, wanting nothing more than to stop the racing of magnus mind. He doesn’t want to ask, doesn’t want to bring up things that might hurt him more but he knew why he was here, but he had no idea how he got here “magnus what happened?” magnus looks at him, alec cant help but notice that he is still wearing the same tv shirt. He sits up a little bit straighter but never lets go of alecs hand.

MAGNUS POV

*24 hours before*

“alexander, you’ve only been gone fiver minutes” there was nothing but softness In his voice even though he was in the middle of the hardest work out he had ever had to do, ever. He may have been silently cursing Rob but never alec. Something like a choked sob comes through the phone, making him stop dead in his thoughts

“what’s happening?” he asked, nothing. No response

“alec can you hear me?” he walks around the gym praying to any god that hasn’t abandoned them that its just bad reception.

“say something” he tries again, ignoring the harsh looks from Rob. There were more important things. He could feel that something was wrong, somewhere in his soul he could feel it. He hangs up the phone before turning around

“something happened” he says the words slowly, his mind still trying to catch up to the truth that his heart didn’t want to except. Something was wrong with Alec, and he had a feeling it was going to be his fault. The guilt that runs through him is paralyzing. There was so many things alec didn’t know, so many things that he hadn’t told him because he thought that it would protect, god everything he did was to protect him but maybe it had only made it worse. There was no way this was random, their was only one person who could have been involved in any of this, maybe if alec would have been told the extent of who he was he would have been able to run, who cares if he never wants to see magnus again, at least he would have the choice. His mind runs to the worst possible situation, running each one like fire through his brain. He things back to all the things his father had done

“magnus, whats going on” Rob is suddenly in front of him with a hand on his shoulder, suddenly magnus feels like a little kid

“I don’t know, my father—alec needs us right now” he fells stupid losing his compositor in front on Rob who was doing him a favor by coaching him. They had come a long way in the past months since first meeting that day in Florida, they were tied together by the love they both shared for alec, something that was going to have to unit them stronger than ever know. Magnus turns and grabs his coat since he was still soaked with sweat and wearing shorts. Rob doesn’t hesitate to go behind his desk to wear the random clothes are found and throw him a pair of sweat pants. Magnus sends him a silent thank you, his mind running to fast for it to be vocalized  
The run through the streets of New York, keeping in relative distance from the gym since he was not gone long enough to be that far away. But it was a big city, their chances of finding him seeming to get lower every time he wasn’t there

“were going to find him” Rob says from beside him. It was easy to see alecs resemblance with his dad, they had the same eyes sure but they spoke the same, even though Robs son was lost in the city he still tried to give some comfort to magnus the same way alec did when it seemed like the world was against them, magnus didn’t deserve it but thought he wanted to. He made a pact that night, when this whole thing was over he was taking them all on vacation. He gave Rob a thankful smile in return before looking down the next street. The dark dident help them. He felt his phone going off in his pocket and to his shock It was alec

“hes calling me” he says before picking up the call

“Alec thank god, where are you darling we are trying to find you” he cant help the relife that spills out of him. He just wanted to find him, he wanted this to be over

“you’ll never find him in time, not like this” it wasn’t alec. He felt his blood run cold at the voice on the other end, wanted to scream in frustration at the world

“Jonathan I swear to god you better tell me exactly where he is” his voice is cold, void of any emotion other then rage. This game was going to far. “this is between me and my father, this has nothing to do with him” it was his fault alec was in the situation he was now, his stupid feud with Al which has now turned to include more people, good people who were   
getting hurt

“your dad doesn’t see it that way” his voice is slow like every word he says is carefully chosen.

“please” there is nothing else he can say, he would get on his knees and beg if he had to 

“you know I cant tell you magnus,” its like every hope he was building had died “do you remember that old book store? The one where we would sit for hours reading different things   
we found, I think you tried to read the bible” of course he remembered it. It wasn’t that long ago that he was living with the person trying to destroy him

“what dose that have to do with any of this?”

“it might be productive for you to go by there” he hangs up the phone before magnus can ask him anything further or yell every profanity he can think of at him. it takes longer then he should have for it to click into place. He turns to rob who is looking at him with sad eyes. He only now thinks maybe they should have phoned Izzy or Jace or anyone to help them, but now it didn’t matter

“I know where he is” he didn’t know whether Jonathan was trying to help him or send him into a trap “or I am leading us to our deaths” he feels obligated to tell him

“lets go” on the way there he tried to think of reasons why Jonathan would be helping them, alec the most really. Its true they used to be best friends but a lot had happened since then, most of which alec doesn’t even know about. Maybe there was something that magnus himself wasn’t understanding. Whatever it was he would take it if it meant that they would be able to save him . they came up to the little book store, magnus eyed ever surface trying to find the idea of something, anything that would lead them in the right direction. He hears someone walking to his left and that’s when he sees him. he doesn’t even think about the person walking away, they don’t matter because alec is laying on the ground at   
the end of the ally.

“Rob” magnus says before running towards him. a part of him didn’t want to see him because that would make it all to real, but he also never wanted something more. He was at his side in what felt like no time at all and wanted nothing more then to collapse into nothing when he was presented with his bloodied face. If magnus wouldn’t have know he was there, wouldn’t have been looking for him he wouldn’t have recognize him. alecs face was covered in blood from more wounds then he could count, his shirt covered in patches. There was so much blood. He was afraid to touch him or breath to close in fear that he would hurt him more, he moved his shaking hand to his forehead, the need to brush the hair from his face suddenly unbearable.

“alec please wake up” rob caught up to him and magnus heard his intake of breath in the same way magnus had done. Rob being the more logical one of the two of them immediately brings his hand to his neck to check for a puls, something magnus had been far to afraid to do. 

“is he—” magnus doesn’t get the words out before Rob is taking out his phone calling 911

“hes breathing” he says when he notices the panic raise in his face. He turns back to the broken boy laying in his arms. This was his fault

“im so sorry” he whispers quietly. He knew Rob was standing their watching him, and he knew that the idea of him and Alec together was one he still struggled with sometimes but in the moment magnus didn’t care who was watching him, the person who made him want to be better, who he loved was laying motionless. No one could blame him for emotions 

“they are on their way” Rob said. Magnus had no idea how rob was acting so controlled until he thought of the way alec could put aside emotions in order to be the bigger person. Magnus was never one for letting people know he was hurt but he was beyond exhausted and beyond scared, he lost the will to care. He looked up at rob who was already staring back at him. it seems like hours later they ambulance pulls up, the paramedics placing him on a stretcher and whisking him away to a hospital leaving magnus and Rob sitting in the blood of their loved one. Its Rob who moves first, offering magnus a and up

“lets go”

It was a long drive to the hospital thanks to the traffic, magnus felt like he was going to explode with something like fear and rage and regret all piled into one killer emotion. He knows what he has to do. He has to talk to his father, has to get on his knees and beg for it to stop no matter what it meant his safety. He had to make sure alec was okay first. 

“take a breath magnus” rob says from beside him. he dose. He thinks about calling Izzy and Jace but cant bring himself to do it, not yet, not until he knew it was safe to do so

“we cant tell the others what happened, not yet” he thought about the fact that someone could be watching them, could be waiting to see who runs in. if his dad didn’t already know who was close to him this was a prime way to do it. He looked at rob and saw the battle on his face, but he knew it too

“we have to tell them, they just can’t come anywhere near here” it was a true statement. Rob phoned the pair of them, explaining in as little detail as possible what had happened and promising to give them updates as long as they stayed as far away as possible from the hospital. When they finally got there magnus heart was beating so loud we was sure Rob could hear it. It felt like the world was moving in slow motion when they walked through the doors, like he was not absorbing any real information just seeing it all through a fog 

“a man named Alexander Lightwood was taken here a few minutes ago” Rob says to the lady at the front desk. She looks at Rob and then magnus as though she is making a point of everything about them, she sees the blood on magnus shirt 

“who are you in relation to the patient?” her voice is bored like she has said this a thousand times 

“he’s my son” Rob says as though he is daring her to counter. Her eyes shift to magnus “he’s Alecs partner” rob says before magnus can get the words out, he looks at Rob in a daze

“im sorry but we can only release information to direct family members” magnus watches as Robs eyes darken, magnus mind spinning to fast to process 

“their married, he’s as much his family as I am” that snaps him out of his haze. He doesn’t say anything just nods his head and looks at rob like he has three heads all of a sudden. The nurse sighs but looks at her computer

“looks like they brought him in around forty minutes ago, he’s in room 164” magnus doesn’t listen to anything else she says as he immediately walks towards the room, he feels Rob beside him instantly

“thank you” he says quietly. He didn’t have to do that, he could have easily left him in the waiting room

“don’t mention it” he said but it a familiar kind of way instead of harsh or jagged. They got to the room and magnus had to stop himself from turning around at the sight. Alec, now clean from the blood that had covered him was now covered in bandages and cuts, his face not seeming as bad as magnus had feared however, only a few large cuts and bruises. His chest was wrapped up though and his arms where stitched and cut. He looked like he had had the fight of his life. Magnus moves to stand by him, taking his hand gently in his. He was okay. 

“this is my fault” he said like a raw admission, this was Robs child laying in the bed before him “im sorry I dragged you both into this” he didn’t want to cry, didn’t want rob to see him cry but he could feel it rising in his chest. The hole he had dug himself into seemed impossible to get out of with everyone still in one piece. But he would be damned if he let it go any further “I promise ill fix it” he leaned down to place a light kiss on alecs forehead. He would kick down Als door if he had to. He goes to move but is stopped by Robs hand on his arm, he sighed before moving them to the small chairs in the corner of the room. Magnus knew what he saw in the moment, he saw a pathetic looking guy who doomed them all

“sit your ass down and listen to what I’m about to say cause I’m only going to say it once” magnus dose as told even though every part of him wants to leave, he could fix this if he spoke to his dad, no one else needs to get hurt 

“your not going on whatever suicide mission you are making up in your mind right now because it wont change anything.” Magnus wants to protest but Robs glare stops him “I might not know everything but I know enough to see that Al wants you to do exactly what you are thinking about doing,” he looks over at Alec “my son is a lot of things magnus, but he’s not someone who dose anything he doesn’t want to do, he knew he was putting himself at risk by standing by you, we all did.” He looks back at him and magnus wants to run at the look in his eye “I don’t care about your history with Al magnus, I really don’t because it doesn’t matter. Alec has made it very clear that he is willing to give up anything for you which means like it or not, your part of this family. which means your not doing this alone” he listens to the constant beeping of the machine, letting it sooth his heart from breaking. there are so many things he wants to say but they all get caught in his throat. he had never had that before. He thinks of his childhood, of his father who took everything out on him, alec had always been his strange kind of family. He couldn’t shake the feeling of wanting to run to Al and beg him to let it stop, to just kill him if he wanted to instead of this. “so you’re going to stay with him, because now he needs you” he says the words like an order, something that is not debatable and magnus is filled with the desire to never let him down. Rob was putting a kind of trust in him that he didn’t deserve but he wanted to. “the time will come to face them in the ring and until then just stay focused” with those words he gets up to go call the other two who were patiently waiting for news 

*present time*

“when you called me I knew something was wrong so me and your dear father came to the rescue” alec knew from the way magnus voice was that there was something he was missing, there were not enough plot points to convince him

“tell me the truth” he said desperately. As much as Alec didn’t want to have the conversation he knew there was nothing else to say before they did. 

“not here.” That’s fair alec said thought. He was only know realizing the amount of pain his entire body was in

“I feel like I was hit by a truck, and then ran through a garbage disposal” he says trying to change the topic, there was no point of asking for more right now. Magnus didn’t laugh, only held onto his hand tighter. It killed alec to see him so desperate. He careful moved himself over on the bed as much as he could without hurting himself and created a space 

“come on” he said gently. He saw the longing on magnus face as he carefully, very carefully slid onto the bed and positioned himself so that alec could place his head in the crook of his neck. He took a deep breath as he felt magnus place a kiss on the top of his head

“Ive never been that scared” he said quietly, the admission breaking alecs already bleeding heart even more. Magnus was holding onto alec as softly as possible yet with more force then ever before. Alec closed his eyes, letting the gentle rise and fall of magnus chest calm his growing fear. “there was so much blood”

“im okay” and he was. He was broken and bruised, sore beyond relief but he was okay. There was a lot they needed to talk about, alec knew that It was going to be the hardest conversation they had ever had and would break pieces of them both, but they would be okay. Alec saw his dad start to open the door, only to stop upon seeing them. His dad gave him a thumbs up before slowly existing again. That was new too. For a moment there was a ceasefire in the war.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we got to see Magnus POV for the first time!!! him and Rob bonding is the most wholesome thing ever i got to say. what do you guys think will happen? why is Jonathan helping them, what's his end game? leave comments and kudos if you enjoyed this!!


	10. TEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyyy guys get ready for some angst!!! it will be okay in the long run though. i hope your all taking care of yourself these days and enjoy this chapter!

Alec is released the next day with a cracked rib and the remainders of a small concussion, he may be bruised and a little broken but nothing that he couldn’t take care of. He had been hurt worse before. What was more important was the tone between him and magnus, they both had so much to say but neither of them wanted to say it when the whole world was listening but they couldn’t just pretend that it dident exist, not in the way that alec couldent stop playing jonathans words in his head or the way that Izzy and jace dident come see him, it dident even make sense how mangnus somehow stumbled across him in the ally. they needed to talk, there was no more avoiding it and they both felt it. 

“both of you take the day off, but I want magnus back at the gym in the morning. We have just over a month before we have to leave and lets just say we have a lot more work to do” magnus gives him a short nod. 

“yes sir” his dads eyes are suddenly on him

“im glad your okay” he dosent say anymore before walking away, mangus and alec not far behind 

“I'm so happy to be out of there,” magnus says from beside him. alecs arm is wrapped around him, he doesn’t know if its to help him or because hes afraid they are running out of time. They both feel the tension between them in the cab ride home, both feel how not talking is better then trying to say anything because the words are living on the tips of their tungs, one wrong breath and they would come pouring out. He needed to confront him about his dad, about Jonathan, about all of it. He wants to throw up when he thinks about the fact that someone had to tell Jonathan magnus had been sick, was their a chance that it was magnus himself? He holds his hand tighter. A part of him dident want to do this, the pain from the injuries radiating through his body, he was so tired. But they couldn’t put it off anymore. The walk to their door is longer then it should be, neither one of them wanting to get their at all. They stop outside the door, both of them feeling like they will be diffent people the next time they step out of it. But magnus opens the door, helping alec inside. They don’t just start fighting immediately. Alec for one needs a shower and magnus needs some new clothes, its almost like they silently agree for a peace until they are in a better state, thinking clear. It would have been better to sleep it off, to really have a clear mind but they couldn’t. It felt like seconds had passed when magnus finally made his way over to the couch, looking somehow more like himself but also different then he ever had before 

“I love you” alec says gently, remembering the last time they fought about the very same fight. Something told him that this was going to be worse

“always” magnus says in return. He takes a deep breath 

“I need to know the truth Magnus” he set his shoulders, readying to face whatever was about it hit him 

“my dad is a dangerous man, more so than you realize”

“so enlighten me” alec cuts in, pulling back when he sees magnus eyes darken 

“He knows the right people, has enough money, there is nothing he can’t do. Do you remember the time I was supposed to fight the champion from Canada but he had to pull out due to injury? My dad paid someone to break his legs because he didn’t think I would win” alec doesn’t know what to say, instead he just takes in as much information as he can “his pride is more important then anything, his image, money, he would kill for it” 

“how dose this involve you?” he thinks back to jonathans words. Magnus looks at him sadly

“because I—I did It too. My life wasn’t like yours, it didn’t fight because I wanted it, it was because he wanted me to do it and if I dident he made sure I knew the consequences of it. I was young and hated my life but their was nothing I could do,” alec feels like he is suddenly holding his breath, the next words having the power to change his life somehow “so I did his dirty work for him. he needed someone gone then I would make sure they would be, in return he gave me money and an apartment, but it wasent enough” alec thinks back to when they were younger, when magnus would go out of town for a couple days but never want to talk about it, the times he came home in the middle of the night and dident talk for the entire next day. Pieces that never fit together suddenly looking like a full puzzle. He lets go of a frustrated breath, not liking where this is going at all “like any young person I fought against him, rebelling in every way I could. I stopped doing all his shit for him and there was nothing he could do about it because at that point I was living with you, was the busiest coach at his gym, he began to need me more then I needed him” they really were just playing a game, one strikes then the other, it just goes round and around 

“what happened after we broke up then?” alec asks, keeping his voice calm, not letting any of his emotions slip through. He knew what happened next, he needed magnus to say it

“I was drunk more then I was sober for awhile, but I never did anything for him, I may have been desperate but never that desperate. Florida was his time to strick back and when that dident work jonathan was his next chance, this fight is just another play” yes, none of that is new. The idea of magnus doing dirty work for Al was, something he dident want to think about right now

“why dident you tell me?” alec asks, that’s not exactly what he thought he was going to say but It needed to be said at some point. Magnus seems to be struggling for words of his own

“because I dident want you to look at me the way you are right now, I thought I could save you” 

“yeah that worked great” there is more aggression in his voice then he wanted their to be but he cant keep the frustration out of his voice. Magnus still isent telling him the truth

“do you want me to say im sorry? Cause I am, god im sorry, but that wont change things” his own voice is slowly getting louder too

“how did you know where I was that night?” a part of him knew, knew who was standing in front of him the minute that he threw the knife instead of using it, he knew how magnus knew where he was. Was their something going on that he dident know? The thought seemed impossible but now he had no idea what was real

“I—me and your dad”

“stop lying” he wants to scream with the feelings running through him, magnus dident want to own it but it was to late for lying

“because jonathan told me, he called me from your phone. He was your best friend not so long ago alec, im sure he dident want you to die” he dances around it, every time he dosent say the words something else breaks

“I think its more along the lines of not so long ago you were living together” the words hang in the air around them comsuming all the air until he felt like he was choking. 

“how did you—”

“dose it really matter magnus? How could you not tell me, when we were in florida, when you looked me in the eyes and told me nothing happned, how could you tell me that and then go call him in the hallway! Where you together when we fought? Has this whole thing between us just been some play at your dad?” he hated feeling as insecure as he did right now, hated that the voice in his head that told him a part of magnus was inlove with jonathan even though every sign pointed to the fact that magnus wasent. If it was nothing more then desperation then why dident he just tell him the truth right off the back. Magnus looks at him like he dosent know what to say, but there is angery growing in his eyes

“where we together when we fought? Are you serious Alec?” alec knew he had said something that hit deeper then he thought it would “I stood their ready to give up everything—my carrer, my friends, my life, I stood their ready for it because it was better then you taking it and your asking me if I was dating jonathan at the same time or if this was real?” alec knew he had stepped maybe to far. He tries to speak but is silenced by magnus eyes “my turn to talk” he takes a deep breath to steady his own breath “you want to know the truth? My and jonathan did date, for quite sometime I might add because you walked away without even listening to a word I had to say. We lived together and had a cat, but I dident love him, or maybe I did in some weird way, is that what you wanted to hear? Yes it was him I was phoning in florida, not because we were still together, but because he was the only one who knew what my dad was doing, what his plan was” alec feels like a five year old. The hates the jealously that runs up his back at the thought of jonathan and magnus together, even more so that he dident tell him about it. “how could you think after everything that what the two of us have isent real”

“why dident you tell me?” 

“because I knew you would act the exact same way that you are right now. You could have died this week and I have to fight in not that long and the only thing you can think about Is jonathan” there is annoyance in his voice that alec hated because he wasent supposed to be the one in trouble, magnus was but suddenly he needed to say everything that he had been keeping in

“you had no right not to tell me magnus! This is something bigger then just you and me, don’t you think it would have been useful to know the guy you are about to fight is inlove with you? Or that your dad is some kind of crime lord, what if—” he cuts himself off, almost to embarrassed to say the words outloud in fear of sounding like a teenager “what if fighting him brought everything back like it did for us? I have a right to know, you should have told me” he normally wouldent be saying the things coming from his mouth but he was tired and sore and tired of all the shit constantly surrounding them, tired of the lies and mistakes, he was just tired of it all. Magnus looks taken aback, like he had been hit 

“I had no right? you left me!! You left me Alec, no matter how much you want to pretend it dident happen, it did. None of this is your right, should I have told you about my dad? Yeah I can own that, but the rest of it Is mine” magnus words were dark, everyone feeling as though it came from somewhere deep. Not anything to do with him? every choice that magnus made impacted him 

“your personal life is not yours anymore, I recall that I’m the one who almost died. Jonathan said that I should run because he will come after me and so yeah magnus you should have told me” every word that came from their mouths was something they couldn’t take back, something that was changing their very foundation 

“you could have walked away, no one is making you do this” YOU ARE he wants to yell but dosent, magnus words hitting ever nerve in his body. Does he want him to leave?

“is that what you want? I know you still talk to jonathan” something in magnus eyes changes, something alec wishes that he could take back but cant 

“after everything ive done for you, everything I gave up, you still don’t trust me” it wasn’t a question, It was a statement that alec wanted to protest but didn’t know how to . this whole thing with Jonathan making him question exactly what it is he believes. It felt like someone was sitting on his chest

“why do you still talk to him?” It was a simple question. He could see the tears in magnus eyes but knew he wouldn’t let them fall, not right now. Magnus got up, turning away from him 

“I don’t alec” his voice seems so far away, something alec hadn’t ever before

“stop lying to me!” alec wants to yell, magnus has to be talking to him because no one else makes sense, how else would he know he was sick, or why else would he care so much about magnus or tell him were alec was? There had to be something he was missing. When magnus looks at him alec can’t help but gasp at the heart break written across it

“is my word not enough? I told you I don’t talk to him, other than the fact that he called me to tell me where you were, you seem to talk to him more then I do” 

“that doesn’t make sense magnus!” this whole thing was more frustrating then he knew how to say, then he knew how to process. He couldn’t stop the part of his mind from thinking there was more. He watches magnus nod his head before grabbing his phone from the table, the tears he had been trying to keep out making their way down his face. He walks towards the door in a move that makes alecs heart stop 

“wait where are you going?” this was just something they needed to get over, not something that needed to result in something like this. Magnus turns back to him sadly 

“if you can’t trust me then I don’t know what we are doing here” he walks out the door, alec watches the door shut behind him. 

He doesn’t know what to do, what to think. Suddenly it feels like he cant move or breath, all he can do is watch the door. What just happened? He wanted to talk to magnus but then it just went to far. he hadn’t meant to say that stuff, or did he? He must have been thinking it, otherwise It wouldn’t have come out. It feels like his mind is stuck, no longer able to understand whats happening around him. magnus walked out, he walked out the door. When was he coming back? Everything was too much, nothing making its way past the barrios that his heart was building up. A part of him wanted to scream, to throw every cruse word he could think of at him because he was not supposed to be mad right now but the longer it sits with him and the longer he thinks about what the words he said the more he knows he messed up. He did trust magnus, it was Jonathan he didn’t trust. But magnus had said nothing was going on which meant that alec might have just thrown everything they have created out the window for nothing. It was easier to think that magnus was lying then to think of the fact that he was wrong. 

He stared at the door until the sun was down and the room was filled with darkness, his body filling with pain from his injuries but also at the point that magnus hadn’t come back. he heard his phone going off from the other side of the room which broke his trance, slowly he got up to answer it. Maybe something was wrong, magnus could be hurt or worse. Instead its Simons name written across the screen 

“hey” his voice is rough from not talking all day

“hey? Don’t you dare “hey” me, what the hell did you do lightwood?” he lets out a breath, if Simon knew it meant that magnus must be okay

“I don’t know, we were just talking and then I got mad and he got mad and then he was walking out the door” saying to someone makes it real

“did you say that you don’t trust him” he hears Simon close a door 

“I might have accidentally implied it” he wants to cry, can feel the tears well in his eyes at the hopeless mess he’s in

“what the fuck Alec, why would you say that?” his voice Is aggressive which is fair, Simon was magnus best friend 

“I don’t know!! I don’t know, I messed up Si, I was mad and tired and I messed up” even if magnus was talking to Jonathan it didn’t mean that alec got to pretend that magnus was the bad guy, he was right, alec left him not the other way around 

“your damn right you messed up” he can imagine simons face right now as he is torn between his two friends

“is he okay?” he says the words quietly, suddenly feeling like he has no right to them. Simon laughs 

“well he showed up at my door drunk beyond belief, it took less than five seconds for him to start crying about what happened so I would say he’s doing great” the words break alecs heart piece by piece, the feeling not kicking in till then. Magnus was hurting and thought the one person who was supposed to stand by him didn’t want to anymore “you really do have good timing dude. Do you not think this is hard enough on him? I had to walk him off a ledge once already this week when you got hurt because he blamed himself for it, like do you even use your brain when you speak sometimes? If you think this is all hard on you boo fucking who because its about ten times harder on him, you blaming and accusing him for shit he never did is a whole new level right now” simon is trying not to yell, magnus probably passed out somewhere is the small apartment. His words are like venom, he really messed up.

“was he talking to him?” he hates the words coming from his mouth but he has to know, has to know. 

“your unbelievable you know that?”

“simon please” the words are desperate like he needs them in order to breath 

“no, he wasn’t. Does that make it better for you? Somehow fix whatever It was you needed fixing because it sure doesn’t help him” no, the words suddenly make him feel like he is falling with no way to stop. It was for nothing. Why did he think that it was going to make him feel better, like somehow all of this would be fixed because he was right? God he was turning into the worst parts of his father. He wants to punch himself in the face for the shit he said in his own confusion and pain 

“who told Jonathan that he was sick?” suddenly he couldn’t think about anything else other then the fact that anyone, anyone could be the spy. Everyone he trusted was up for suspicions. It felt like spiders where crawling through his chest, making him want to crawl out of his very skin 

“why don’t you ask Dom, didn’t you know he fights for Al” when alec didn’t respond Simon sighed “you need to figure out what side your on man. , magnus can’t go through this again” with those words he hangs up. Dom, the nutrition expert who just happened to run into him on the streets and be willing to help him even though he was a complete stranger, who knew everything about them and who alec had phoned that morning about magnus being sick. Had alec been so desperate for help that he put them both in danger? He wanted to throw up or pass out all at the same time as his entire world fell apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooo magnus walked out this time, alec is acting like a teenager, he found the spy, figured stuff out about magnus, so many things happening all at once!!! i hope you guys liked this!! leave kudos and comments if you did!


	11. ELEVEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!!! i hope you like this chapter, alot happens hahaha. i hope you like ittttt

He stayed on the couch all night, unable to see the sight of the empty bed waiting for him. it he cried by himself for the first time in years, feeling as though someone had ripped a limb off of him. he felt everything and nothing all at the same time, the overwhelming feelings of regret and heartbreak mixed with the numb feeling of it all being his fault. It was his fault. He should have listened or tried to understand, he was just so angry, so frustrated that they weren’t being honest with each other. Magnus should have told him, these things affected him too and he should have been informed but maybe he went to far with Jonathan. He wanted to stay on his couch forever, feeling like he may never be able to move again. His chest burned from his ribs but the pain was welcomed, a reminder that he could feel something other than heartbreak. Did he destroy everything for nothing? He couldn’t think about Dom, couldn’t think about the fact that he had been played like that and then laughed at behind close doors. Once the thought entered his mind he couldn’t get it out, he couldn’t yell at magnus, couldn’t yell at himself but he could yell at someone, someone who deserved to be yelled at. He took out his phone and dialed the number

“hey Alec, what’s going on” even hid voice made alec want to punch something 

“stop the shit Dom, I know who you are” he tries to keep his voice calm but he can’t stop it from shaking, his whole body was shaking 

“what are you talking about?” he tried for innocence but it won’t work, he just destroyed the only real thing in his life because of this man

“I know you work for Al, that you only said you would help me so that you could feed him information” doms silence is enough of an answer

“took you long enough to figure it out” its like now that his secret was out his entry personality was different, everything suddenly changing to make more sense for who he really was

“listen you son of a bitch” he spits the words like venom, feeling his tears come to his eyes once again, he doesn’t try to hold them back “if you ever come near either of us again, Ill kill you” the words aren’t enough, the need to physically hit something more powerful then ever, he feels himself clench a fist

“no need for that Alec, a little birdy told me that he doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore, I wonder if your mad at me or really just mad at yourself” he hangs up the phone before he can say anymore, not wanting the words to stick in his mind that somehow Dom knows too, there were things at play that he dident understand, the spider web of people and lies all getting to big but he didn’t care, he didn’t care because magnus was gone. He laid back on the couch, intent to stay there for the rest of time.   
And he dose, it takes seven days before anyone comes by, seven days of magnus being gone, of alec sitting on a couch with nothing but his thoughts. But by the afternoon of the seventh day someone was banging on his door as though they were ready to kick it down, he heard the lock twist before seeing his sister walk in as though it was hers

“get your ass up” there was a hard edge to her voice. Was everyone against him these days. He sat up slowly, big movements something he was unable to do. “you are not allowed to just sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Magnus told me what happened, what were you thinking alec?” He goes to say something, say anything but the words die in his throat when he looks at her, he cant help the new wave of emotion that falls from his eyes. Her face softens “It’s impossible to be mad at you when you cry” it was like he couldn’t stop, having had time to think about the mess he was in, he had never felt more hopeless then he did right now. She sits down beside him, he leans into her arms, relishing in the thought of being held 

“I messed up Iz, I messed up so bad” he felt her hand running up his arm in the way she did when he was a child and was over whelmed with panic and fear 

“i know” her voice no longer held the over tones of aggression, the only thing left being understanding

“but he should have told me! How could he keep that from me, I thought we were on the same page” she pulls away suddenly, looking at him as though she was about to say the   
most important thing in the world 

“I don’t think anyone thinks that he was completely innocent in this whole thing cause he wasn’t, but he apologized for that” he puts a hand on his shoulder “but you accusing him of cheating when he so obviously would lay down his life for you is unacceptable alec, what were you thinking?” every word hits him hard, the realization of his own mistakes somehow harder to handle then magnus leaving.

“I don’t know, I was mad and tired and just wanted everything to be out in the open” there’s no excuse, his own words sounding wrong like a child who was trying to make an excuse   
for breaking a lamp 

“did you think to ask him why they got together?” no, every sensible question that he could have asked had gone out the window because all this mind could focus on was the fact that magnus wasn’t telling him the truth

“no” he doesn’t look at her, his own shame coming to the surface more then he would like it too. She sighs 

“they were together because it was the only thing he could do, you were out of the picture and living whatever life it was you thought you wanted and he was left with nothing alec” he doesn’t need to go over this again, somehow everyone seemed to know how hard it had been for magnus, none of them ever stopped to think about how hard it had been for him, maybe because it was his fault. “when Jonathan came around begging for forgiveness, he was so desperate for something real, something that was his and not his dads device that he jumped at the opportunity” god alec felt stupid “he pretended to be happy but we all saw how sad his eyes were, he was forcing himself in a situation that he thought he deserved The second your name came back up he broke it off, unable to think about anything other then you, how can you think that he is anything other than committed?” her words are almost a plea, it was easy to forget how close magnus and his sister had gotten over the years, even harder to think about the fact that every time she asked him about his love life or girls she was trying to get him to tell her the truth, almost in the same way he had been trying to get magnus to come clean on his own. The new information was like putting salt in an already open wound. He messed up, he knew that dom was the person talking to Al not Magnus, but who told dom about their fight? He realizes It doesn’t matter, none of it matters because him and magnus were supposed to be a team, where supposed to be in this together. He doesn’t change his opinion on magnus telling him because he should have told him but he also sees why he dident

“I miss him” the words were like a secret confession, something he could only say to his sister. Once he said the three words, they became a part of him, the missing spot in his life where magnus was supposed to be suddenly intensified until its all he could think about. 

“I know you do” her words are soft but strong, he knows that she has been talking to magnus, is having to watch him go through whatever it is that he is going through. 

“hes been through a lot Alec, you’ve put him through a lot” he knows that, the thought constantly on his mind. How was he ever supposed to make up for everything he’s done, for a past neither of them could change “you can’t keep doing this, changing your mind every three seconds about what you think of him. either go all in or let him walk away” he can’t think about magnus really walking away, of him going out on dates with someone else, of him looking at someone the way he only looks at alec, of he himself being left with nothing but the guilt of what should have been. The thoughts make his chest tighten; he can physically feel nothing but panic run through his ribs.

“I cant—” he takes a deep breath to stop his voice from breaking “I can’t lose him, I won’t” but maybe it was too late, maybe magnus had taken enough shit from him and was finally ready to move on “what if he’s really done?” he fear had been their since magnus had walked out the doors, he had never done that before. She looks at him with a sad smile

“as much as we all wish he would sometimes, I don’t think there is anything you could do that would make him truly walk away” the words were bitter sweet. He only then starts to think about why his sister was truly at his place

“why are you here Iz?” her face changes to fake innocents 

“because I was concerned for the well-being of my brother who no one has seen in seven days,” alec knew there was more “and because Dads sick and needs you to teach” his eyes go wide. As much as he wanted to see magnus, to the point that it felt like his body was craving it, he also did not want to see him, not like this. But they knew the risks taking this fight. Knew that even if they were fighting or not getting along they needed to be able to act professional. He sighs but knows that there is no getting out of it.

“can I at lest have a shower first?” her face lights up as she sends their dad a text

“make it quick, I left jace in charge” oh boy

He gets to the gym and for the first time in his life it feels like the enemy. He’s never been this anxious to walk into the gym, but the other half wanted to run through the doors like he needs them to breathe because a part of him thinks that he might. He opens the doors and doesn’t let his eyes wander, too afraid of magnus being able to see the despair in them, or maybe he’s to afraid to see the look reflected in magnus eyes too. They needed to talk, no matter how that conversation was going to end they needed to talk but not right now, right now they needed to put their personal life to the side because bigger things were at stake. He walks to the back feeling everyone’s eyes on him. its not hard to guess what happened, alec was always there if magnus was, and now here he is walking in with bloodshot eyes and heartbreak was written across his face. He knows magnus is watching him, feels his eyes on his every step but he doesn’t turn to meet him, instead, he keeps walking until he gets to jace

“wow you look like shit” jace says with a hint of concern. Alec doesn’t want to talk about it again, doesn’t think that he can bare more people telling him that hes wrong while also insisting that magnus was too, maybe they were both to blame

“thanks, I got the class” he takes off his coat leaving him in a hoodie and sweat pants, he didn’t want to train, somehow the hoodie made him feel a bit more protected. 

“thanks man, I know that’s it—” alecs eyes stop him, not here he screams “thanks” jace grabs his jacket before running out the door. Izzy had said that he had to go out with clary and her family or something similar that he couldn’t get out of. Alec would have to get back to life at some point.   
The class was doing laps around the gym, alec did everything in his power to make his eyes look anywhere other then magnus but its like he couldn’t see anything else, he had missed him more then he thought he could. He looked like he wanted people to think he was okay. the wall that had been broken down suddenly right back up so that the world couldn’t see his pain. But alec could, he could see it in the circles under his eyes and the way is hands shake when he holds them up. He wants to scream or punch something because its his fault. 

“alright, pair up and start the drills written on the bored” he didn’t want to teach, it was going to be hard enough doing drills with magnus later. For a split second his eyes meet magnus, a thousand words are shared between the two of them, each moment breaking something else inside of him. seeing magnus makes him want to scream. A part of him was so mad at him, how could he keep it from him, they were supposed to be a team, they were supposed to handle things together but the other more sensible part of him wants to scream every apology that he can think of before its to late. He doesn’t do either, instead he walks over to a chair and takes a seat, his body still in repair mode from the attack.   
As much as he wishes it would, the class doesn’t go on forever, soon he is bowing them out and the fighters are leaving the floor, all accept magnus who stands there like he doesn’t quite known what to do anymore. Alec takes a breath, he could be professional 

“because of my side I cant hold pads, I want five rounds on the bag with thirty second sprints between them to start” his voice is void of emotions other then authority, feeling like if he let anything slip out he wouldn’t recover from it. Magnus face doesn’t change, alec notices how his shoulders drop, magnus doesn’t look mad like he thought he would. He thought that he would look into his eyes and see rage and hurt, but instead his eyes are just incredibly sad. He nods his head before putting his gloves on. For a moment alec is glad that he cant hold, not sure he would be able to deal with magnus that close, not when the gym was filled with other people who didn’t need to hear their personal problems. He set the timer and watched as magnus started. He watched the way he punched, the way he moved, trying to find holes that Al was going to exploit, was going to use against him 

“when you throw your right hand, you need to make sure you keep your left up” he says off hand, saying all the things he sees out loud like he was supposed to be. It was the most professional training they had ever done, no laughing, no teasing each other about this and that, nothing but training. The energy around them was electric, something that no one wanted to get near because it felt like it would blow at any given moment. Alec himself almost couldn’t bare it. He wanted to fall into his arms, tell him how sorry he was, that he loved him and didn’t know how to survive without him, he wanted to get on his knees and beg for him to stay, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t because he didn’t even know If magnus wanted that despite his sisters’ words. 

He finished his rounds on the bag and walked back over to alec

“what now?” his voice is strange, controlled and hidden. He is trying just as hard as alec, suddenly he has no idea

“I—” he takes a second to regain his train of thought, to think of what a normal person would do, what he normally would do “lets do five rounds of sprints and call it a day” he wanted to get out of there, not knowing how to talk to him suddenly. Was this his last chance? The thoughts wouldn’t get out of his mind, was this his last chance to ask him to stay? 

As magnus runs back and forth across the gym alec for the first time the silence around them is uncomfortable enough to kill. When hes done he doesn’t walk back over to were he’s standing, instead he walks over to the other side of the room and falls against the wall, taking a moment to breath. Alec wants to walk over, to sit down and talk but his feet are frozen to the ground, he doesn’t think that he could take magnus rejection. But its all so wrong, everything about it was wrong, the air, the gym, everything was not the way it should be. How did alec ever survive those years without him, without having what they have, he can’t help the thought that magnus was his only chance at everything he wanted, he knew that no one else could ever fix the scar that he would leave. He watches magnus take off his gloves and collect his gear before looking back at alec

“anything else?” this is his moment. The words hang in the air like an open invitation to talk, to say to each other what they both need to say. this is the chance to say all the words running through his mind, but he can’t get them out, the words stuck In his throat

“no, that’s it” he can physically feel the change, the moment more important then he thought, the sudden thought that he blew it ran through him, but magnus was already walking away, alec swears that he could hear his heart breaking.  
He sits in the gym watching the door of the gym the same way he did at the apartment, how did he let him go again. He hears his phone going off and sees Izzys face on the screen, he picks up with a sigh 

“I thought you were going to fix things?!” her voice is loud, any trace of softness from the morning gone. Alec sat on the ground, running a hand over his face. He knew it

“are you with him?” he knows that she must be considering he only left thirty minutes ago and has nowhere else to go other then her and simon 

“he showed up at my door, you really screwed up Alec, he thinks its over” the words send a terrifying shock through him. over? What does she mean over

“what do you mean?” he doesn’t want to hear the words coming from her mouth 

“exactly what you think it means. He thinks that you’ve given up” there is anger in her voice like she cant believe what’s happening. He can’t breath for a moment. Given up? They were just having a disagreement, he never thought for a moment that they wouldn’t find a way to get past this, that they wouldn’t come back to each other in the end 

“no, did he—” he takes a deep breath trying to calm his racing heart from falling out of his chest. The ache at not having him the loneliest feeling in the world. He never thought about how much of his life was intertwined with magnus, he was his best friend. Not having that, him, what they have built was something he couldn’t even think about without feeling like the empty feeling would eat him alive “dose he want it to be over?” his voice was shaking and scared. She dosent say anything for a moment, he imagines her looking through the door at magnus

“Alec don’t you get it? You’re the only real thing he has left. Judging by the broken mess on my couch I would say hes just as scared as you are” he cant think of magnus right now without wanting to scream. How could he ever think that alec didn’t love him, that he wouldn’t take a bullet for him if he had to. Maybe because he keeps leaving he thinks. “hes your chance at happiness alec, don’t lose it over something stupid”

“how do I fix this” the words are barely a whisper, his mind racing with ideas “how can I possibly fix this” he feels his eyes well up. He has never felt more hopeless then he doses right now, never felt more like the world should just stop spinning around him because there’s no use for it anymore. 

“you know how, I’m going to send him to the coffee shop down the street from me, I recommend you meet him there” she hangs up the phone. This really is it, the last call for them to come back to each other. Alec knew he was going to have to swallow his pride and beg for forgiveness even though a part of him doesn’t believe it was his fault, it doesn’t matter though because at lest he would have magnus. He gets up and walks out the door, he knows what he has to do. 

He finds that he doesn’t know what to do. Hes walking to the coffee shop with his heart in his throat, trying to somehow find the words to make magnus stay, to make him understand that he might have been mad but he does trust him, he trust and loves him, he needs to make him understand what he means because a part of alec thinks that magnus is starting to think that he is just something expendable, something alec only wants when things are easy. He can’t believe magnus has stayed as long as he has when he thinks about it. It feels like someone is sticking a knife in his chest when he thinks of the pain he has caused him. he gave up more then alec could imagine all because he couldn’t imagine alec taking the shot instead. Alecs taken him for granted, he can admit that but he makes a promise to himself that he won’t let that happened again, magnus had suffered enough, he had spent his whole life trying to save aelc and now it was his turn. He texted his sister and found out that magnus had just ordered because he just asked her what she wanted, she said she better not get the drink in the end. He knew he had to make things right.   
The coffee shop was busy as usual and it took him some time to spot magnus, mostly because he looked like, well shit for no other words. It was painful to see his bloodshot eyes, his face was more hopeless then alec thought it could be, he cant help but think it’s the same way he must have looked the night at the bar all those years ago. He takes a deep breath, suddenly blanking on anything he thought he would be able to say. He stands beside him at the counter 

“thought I would find you here” his voice is more uncertain then it had ever been around magnus, he felt lightheaded. Magnus turns to him surprised but his face soon changes to something alec never wants to see again, something he can’t even name but he’s sure it’s the same feeling that has been living in his chest for the past four days. 

“i think Izzy told you I would be” his voice is cold but the cold that isent real, the kind you present when you don’t want the world to know how your feeling. He looks tired

“that’s true” it’s the first time he doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know how to act, magnus had always been something so natural, something that he never even had to think about but now it was different, now they acted like they didn’t know each other. Maybe they were both so afraid of saying the wrong thing that they thought saying nothing was better. But magnus was still his boyfriend, wasn’t he? They needed to talk. He sighs “magnus, can we please talk?” there is a hint of desperation in his voice, he cant help but notice the spark of hope that flashes in magnus eyes, quick enough that alec thinks he might have imagined it, but it was there. He thinks of Izzy’s words, he thinks that its over. If magnus thought that alec was giving up, he cant imagine what’s going through his mind right now

“yeah” it’s simple but makes alecs heart hurt none the less, he was used to seeing and hearing magnus every day, the four days that he had been gone seem like forever. Maybe it was the sleepless nights or the couch that he never moved off of, maybe it was the fact that he had cried more then he can remember crying since he walked out the first time, whatever the reason it felt like they had been apart longer then he could handle. Magnus takes the drinks and walks out the door without saying a word, knowing that alec would follow him. they walk down the street in silence before Magnus hands him a drink

“if izzy was involved then I guess this is for you” alec takes it with a quick thank you. It felt like his entire body was alive in the worst ways, the places where his arm brushed against magnus lighting on fire, the kind of fire that he wanted to keep for the rest of his life. Magnus leads them to a park bench, one that they had sat on hundreds of times, the one where they would meet when the rest of the world couldn’t know who they were to each other. They sit down and hes never felt colder then when magnus looks at him with a sadness so vast that he feels it drowning him 

“If your going to break up with me do it quick, places to be and all that” it was a brave front but alec could see his lip quiver, could see the fauls set of his shoulders. He didn’t want alec to know what he was feeling and that alone was destroying. 

“I’m not breaking up with you,” he sees magnus drop his shoulders, a little breath coming out as though he is relived. magnus had the power to walk away right now before alec got the chance to fight, to plea his case, he was giving magnus the power to destroy him. 

“magnus I,” he takes his time, trying to find the right words to say all the things he needs to say, he only gets on chance, one single chance to take back what he said. Before he can magnus is putting his drink down

“im sorry,” magnus blurts out before alec can. Alecs a little taken aback but lets him continue “im sorry. I should have told you. I should have told you about all of it, my dad, Jonathan, me, I should have told you all of it because your right it did include you, you almost died and it was my fault,” he takes a deep breath, alec can see his hands shaking “I should have told you.” he looks down at his hands, unable to look alec in the eyes and he wants to cry at the look on his face. “but that doesn’t mean you can accuse me and say I did things that I would never do as though im just playing a game, like you are some piece on a chest bored because your not, I think ive proved that enough” He had never seen magnus so sad before. It takes everything in him to stop himself from falling apart

“im sorry magnus, fuck im sorry” the words tumble out of his mouth before he can stop them, he tries to find nicer ones but he was never the literate one. He plays with the bottle of his cup “I shouldn’t have accused you of anything, I shouldn’t have pushed and blamed you for everything because you’ve never done anything but stick by me. We are supposed to be a team and I let you down when you needed me, I’m so sorry” he could feel the tears in his eyes when magnus looked at him with his blood shot ones “I never meant—I never meant to hurt you” he cant help his voice from breaking, the emotions making it hard to breath “all you do is sacrifice yourself for me time and time again and I do nothing but shit on you in return.” He looks at his hands, he’s not saying this right “but I trust you, more then I trust anyone and if you say you didn’t do it then I should have believed you, I should have stood by you because all you do is stand by and support me even when you pay the price” hes repeating himself, the words all coming out in a tumble of desperate pleas for him to stay.” he makes sure magnus is looking at him, there is still so many words that he has to say, so many more then he has the words to say but he hopes his point is clear, hopes that the desperation in his voice is enough to make him stay, hopes that magnus knows every word is true. He would give up anything for him, would do anything if he asked him to if it meant that he got to keep him, got to fall asleep with his heart beating against his every night for the rest of his life because there is no version of life when he wouldn’t want this, want him. magnus looks at him like he cant believe the words coming from his mouth. Alec wants to wipe away the tears that are slowly falling down his face but doesn’t want to push. He feels a little bit of hope when a small smile spreads across his face

“and they say I’m dramatic” his voice was softer then it had been before, his face more open then it had been. Something he had said worked “we both got caught up in a game, neither of us are innocent in this, but we cant just act like it never happen” alec doesn’t love the way this is going “we have to be able to trust each other, to rely on each other because no one else is going to be there for us when this is over” magnus slowly reaches across to grab his hand as though he is not sure hes allowed to, alec gives it to him without question. He would do anything he asked him too. Magnus looks down for a second “we are nothing If we don’t have that.” Alecs mind spins trying to find the right words to say, to stop the words leaving magnus mouth, he really dosent like the way this is going 

“your right, we are nothing if we don’t have that but we do. I said I was sorry and I am, like you said I got caught up in this the same way that you did but I didn’t mean it. Of course I trust you magnus, I wouldn’t have agreed to help you if I dident” he holds onto his hand tighter as though magnus could turn and walk away at any moment. “we are a team, you and   
me, always,” magnus eyes look skeptical like he doesn’t know what to think, what to believe “please, tell me how to fix this” magnus looks at him like he is in that moment making a choice, making the choice that will dictate their future. Alec knows that hes right, that they couldn’t just go back to normal and pretend this never happened because it did, and they needed to talk about it. Magnus squeezes his hand

“well it seems that over all we have some major communication issues, and may have some minor trust ones” he dosent look at alec as he talks, looking anywhere else. He takes a breath “I dident tell you about Jonathan and my dad because I was afraid that you were going to leave again when things got hard” the words are a confession, one that was meant to lay out all the cards on the table to why they fought in the first place. Alec knows better then to argue with it, the words stung but they were true 

“I got mad because I was afraid you finally realized that you should be with someone better then me, someone more like you” he had never said the words out loud before but they were more true then anything else. Whether it was the night of the party or walking down the street, magnus was always gold, always making himself fit in wherever he was, alec saw the way people stared at him, who was he to stop magnus from finding someone who would be able to fit as seamlessly into that world. Magnus seems more surprised then alec thought he would. It wasn’t the fact that they didn’t trust each other, it was more the fact that neither of them thought they were good enough. It seemed almost comical in the movement only because it was better then how desperately he wanted magnus to stay. 

“we are both afraid of being left” it was a statement that summed up a lot of their problems, maybe if they believed more in themselves they would be better about opening up around each other. “even though there are a thousand signs pointing to the fact that no one is going to” they look at each other in agreement, both feeling the same thing in the moment.

“how do we fix it” all he could think about was how to fix this, how to go home and finally fall into a real bed with magnus safely beside him, to feel like a whole person again instead of just an empty hole. He knew that magnus was it for him, there would never be someone else and he got the feeling magnus felt the same, but saying it was easier then believing it. Magnus looks at him with a small uncertain smile

“the way I see it, we both want certainty.” for the first time it looks like magnus is trying to find the right words instead of just saying the first thing he thinks of. “this of course wont make all our problems go away, won’t make the world any less crazy and it wont make the fight any less stressful, this wont solve everything and its not going to be easy by any means but,” alec thinks he knows where magnus is going but cant be sure

“tell me what it is” he has no patients, that magnus knows and he only smiles, playing with alecs fingers nervously 

“but I think that it would definitely create certainty—”

“you want to get married” its not a question, its statement that alec cant believe he didn’t think of first. Its not that he never thought of marring magnus, of course he did but he also just always thought of them as a team because he couldn’t picture them not together. He had come close to asking him before they broke up all those years ago, how different would his life be if he had just done that. 

“we don’t have to of course” he rushes out, alec doesn’t think that he has ever seen magnus more nervous than he is right now “but I need you to know that I don’t want to be with someone like me, I want to be with you because we aren’t perfect, we make mistakes and say the wrong thing but its still us, you are still the only person I want to complain about having to eat salad to and fall into when I’m sick, you aren’t expendable” magnus brings their joint hands to his mouth and places a soft kiss on the top of alecs hand. He can see the desperation in his eyes, the same look that’s In alecs too. They were always going to have problems, things where always going to go wrong but this was a promise that no matter what they would get through it together 

“magnus, I want you, I want us, I want all of it. the good times and bad, always. I cant promise that im not going to mess up because I know that I will, so will you but I promise at the end of everyday its going to be you and me no matter how messy it gets because I don’t think I know how to do this whole life thing without you anymore” magnus doesn’t respond, only lets himself fall forwards into alecs arms. He feels him wrap his arms around his waist, carful of the side that still stings a little with every breath but he hold onto him like it’s the last time he ever will. Alecs own arms fall around his shoulders protectively, he will never let his go. Magnus seems to deflate in his arms, griping onto the fabric of his shirt like a life line. Alec lets himself breath in the familiar sent, lets it calm his raging emotions that are still trying to figure out where they landed after that. He almost lost this, the thought more apparent then ever as he holds onto him tighter. He almost lost this but now he never had to let it go again. 

“I love you” magnus mumbles into his shoulder

“always” he says in return. He dosent know when they started that but it felt more natural then anything. He pulls back slightly needing to see magnus face. He cant help but notice how tired he looks, he would bet money that alec himself looked the same if not worse. He feels magnus slowly lean in, as though a part of him is asking alec for permission, he responds by closing the gap between them in a kiss more desperate and filled with love then anything he had ever experienced. Any doubts running though his mind silenced by how good it felt to be back in his arms. He moves back only to lean his forehead against magnus, taking a moment to breath

“lets make the first promise right now, no more lies, no more secrets, everything needs to be on the table” magnus words are sure, like even if they scare him hes willing to do it cause maybe he is just as scared of losing alec

“I promise” magnus places a small kiss on his lips as though to seal it. 

“can we go home?” alec cant believe how tired he is all of a sudden, the fight with magnus and drama and the sleepless nights on the couch finally catching up to him. magnus pushes them closer together like he suddenly cant bare the idea of any space between them 

“please, Simons couch was starting to haunt me” he means for it to lighten the mood but it only makes alecs grip on him tighten. They still had a lot to figure out, the next month   
was going to test them in ways that are supposed to break them, but sitting on the park bench with magnus safely in his arms hes not afraid of it, they will get through it together and that he knows for certain 

The second they get home he goes straight to the bed, his eyes getting hard to hold up every step he takes. A part of him wants to push magnus against the bed and kiss him until he forgets his name, but the other more sensible part of him feels like he had been hit by a truck going full speed and then forced to stay awake for the following five days. He quickly checks his phone and sees the messages from his sister

“im proud of you” the top one reads; he smiles before throwing it across the room. It was barely four in the afternoon but he was ready to sleep, magnus beside him seemed to have the same idea. They were both mentally and physically exhausted, alec was glad that they were both on the same page, not sure he could say no if magnus started kissing up his   
neck. He dosent even take his socks off before he is falling on the still made bed that he couldn’t get himself to look at, magnus following close behind. He pushes the covers up and over the both of them even though they are both wearing jeans, he has never felt as comfortable as when magnus moves over to rest his head on his chest

“lets just sleep for the next three days” magnus says quietly, his voice soft and safe. Alec leans his head onto of magnus, relishing in the feeling of holding him once again. 

“you have to get at the gym tomorrow” alec doesn’t open his eyes as he talks, letting his body decompress from the stress. He hears magnus groans but he doesn’t complain 

“it cant be worse then the gym this morning” yeah, it was pretty bad. Alec had never felt that out of place in his life

“it was pretty bad yeah” both of their voices were soft and quiet, the voices of two people tittering on the edge of sleep 

“I wanted to throw myself out the window” alec cant help but laugh at that, feeling weird that they started the day like that and ended it like this, together and talking about marriage. Its not the craziest day that they have had but it was definitely up their

“I thought about throwing myself of the heavy bags” magnus laughs in turn before the lasp into a comfortable silence. Alec cant stop the things from coming to his mind, h dosent want to bring up what he already knows that he is going bring up 

“do you know a guy named Dominik, fights for your dad I think” he tries to keep his voice causal, like its just some off question. magnus is silent for a moment 

“im going to need more then that” his voice is still soft but his can feel his grip on his shirt tighten 

“goes by Dom maybe, blue hair” 

“yeah ive seen him, why” its alecs turn to be silent

“because we promised to be honest, I have to tell you something” magnus takes in a breath, alec just wanted everything on the table once and for all “so you know the guy I had been   
working on your weight with? Yeah, no that was him” magnus looks at him, alec doesn’t know what to say, feeling his own embracement coming out on his face in the form of a blush.

“that dose make some things make sense” magnus doesn’t get mad or tell him that he was an idoit, not that magnus was the person to do that but alec felt it none the less

“im sorry” he places a kiss in magnus hair. He put then both in danger by being careless, al was tracking their every move through someone alec thought for a second he could trust. Magnus turns over, pausing himself impossibly closer to alec 

“don’t be, I should tell you that the night I walking out the first thing I did was find a liquor store, but the second thing I did was call Jonathan” alecs heart feels like it suddenly stopped beating, hes shocked that magnus couldn’t hear it from his spot on his chest “I called and yelled at him for around ten minutes, I’m sure he was quite confused but I was so mad at you, and at me, at him, he was the only person I could call without recourse” alec lets out his breath, he did the same thing with Jonathan that alec had done with Dom 

“that means that your dad thinks your heartbroken right now” it was something if they wanted to use they could, something that could actually maybe help them. He feels magnus place a small kiss on his neck

“not for long im sure, there’s probably about ten different people following us” his voice is far to casual for this conversation, both of them are but magnus is so warm against him

“that’s slightly concerning” alec says once again closing his eyes, content to not think about what his words imply until hes had a good ten hours of sleep at lest. 

“for sure” magnus seems to think the same thing, his words lazy and slurred. The last thing alec thinks before he feels sleep taking over him is the fact that he wants to fall asleep like this every day for the rest of his life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Marriage??? wow that chapter was alot!! but they need each other to get through this, they cant do it alone. i hope you guys liked it as much as i did and leave comments and kudos if you do!!


	12. TWELVE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!! i hope you all enjoy this part!!

Morning comes to early, far to soon for either of them, though alecs surprised that they stayed sleeping, apart of him thinking they would be up all night but that only shows how tired they had both been. But the sun was coming in through the window and they had work to do. he opens his eyes to see that magnus Is already looking at him, a lazy smile playing across his face

“did we really talk about getting married yesterday” the words aren’t what he thought he was going to say but magnus words bring a smile on his face. He didn’t hate waking up if it was going to be like this 

“we did yeah” magnus lips are on his before anyone can say anything else, saying all that he wants without having to use the words. He feels like he is in a dream still, nothing but warm bliss living in his chest. Magnus pulls away quickly without saying anything

“ill be right back” he runs around the corner, alec using this as a chance to check his phone, seeing the missed texts and calls from his dad telling him that he was going to be away sick for another day and that alec needed to coach. At lest it wasn’t going to be awkward anymore. he responds with a quick thumbs up before putting it away and laying back on the bed, giving himself one more moment of bliss before having to face the day. The fight was a month away, they had to leave in three weeks because of weigh ins and the press conference so they had three weeks to get magnus down to weight, that was not very much time at all. But alec can’t help but not care when magnus comes bouncing back into the room, crawling back over to alec. There is a joy on his face so different from the day before. He gently takes alecs hand in his 

“marry me” he says the words looking directly at him even though they were a bit past the point of that now, alec could hardly believe them none the less, the words sounding like something he never thought he would hear even though they already talked about it. Alec lets a small bliss filled laugh dance past his lips 

“I already said yes” he brings his other hand to the side of magnus face, how did he end up here with his favorite human wanting to spend the rest of his life with him. he feels magnus gently slip a ring on his finger, the motion making alec look down in surprise. It was a simple black band that alec had seen magnus wear more than once, liking the way it changed to something like dark blue in the right light

“yes but now its official, well sort of.” He plays with his ring on alecs finger and alec feels like he might pass out from the things bubbling inside of him right now. He looks around the room, suddenly wishing he had taken more of an interested in things like jewelry himself

“ill find one for you” his mind immediately knowing what he wanted. Magnus face is split by a smile. Instead of responding he pulls him in for another kiss, this one more passionate then the last. He feels magnus move so that he is basically sitting in alecs lap, his hands both in his hair. Alec wraps his arms around his waist to keep him from falling. He hears his phone going off but doesn’t care, his mind filled with too many other things right now. He feel magnus bit down on his lower lip, he gets to have this for the rest of his life. The moment is however ruined by his phone going off again and again

“you should probably get that” magnus says against him

“its just my dad saying we need to go to the gym” he places his own lips on his jaw, one hand running up his back. when his phone goes off for the third time in sixty seconds, “I should get that, someone might be dying” magnus falls off of him with a laugh as alec runs to get the phone that wont stop calling. Its his dad

“I know ill be there soon” he says, already moving to find clothes. He really thinks about just calling it a day when he sees magnus laying in front of him looking like the most precious thing in the world.

“Alec, Al and his guys are here, I suggest you two getting asses down here immediately” alecs blood runs cold

“what does he want?” he gestures for magnus to get up, which he dose when he sees alec throwing on a new pair of paints and a shirt.

“he wants to talk about the details, get here quick” he hears his dad cough, he was not even supposed to be there today

“on our way” he hangs up the phone quickly, turning to magnus who was throwing clothes on 

“your dads at the gym” he sees magnus eyes widen a little but before he nods his head. Alec feels the ring on his finger like a promise, suddenly realizing that this was going to be a   
show of strength, a chance to show that they were as united as ever before. He sends izzy a quick text before looking back at magnus who was wearing a tank top that looked oh so good on him, he was looking in the mirror trying to fix his hair. Alec walks up behind him and places a kiss on his cheek “you look great” magnus shoes him away and he runs to quickly pack his stuff, well magnus stuff back into the bag so that they are ready as soon as magnus is.   
They quickly make their way down the street, stopping at the coffee shop on the way there because although alcohol would be preferred right now, there was no way that he was going to get through this without caffeine. Magnus looks at him longingly when he takes a sip, alec laughs as they continue their walk

“want to smell it?” magnus doesn’t answer only takes the drink from him 

“god I miss coffee” he says, holding it close to his face as though he is trying to imprint the smell into his skin

“four weeks and you can drink it’ alec takes his cup back with one hand and wraps his other around magnus as though he could somehow protect him from the people trying to get him. he cant help play back the words from the night before about people watching for them, the thoughts make something in his stomach twist. He sees standing around the corner from the gym so that the people on the inside wouldn’t see her, he lets go of magnus before quickly walking towards her

“did you get it?” he asks quick, knowing that they needed to be inside, its like he could sense the bad energy coming from them, they were in his home and nothing good would come out of it. But this was important. She pulls the ring out of her pocket 

“yeah, but what’s the big deal its like nine in the morning” he gives her a quick smile before showing her the ring on his own finger, watching her eyes widen to the size of a cartoon figure. He knows she’s about to explode but he doesn’t let her

“ill explain after, I have to go, thank you” he leaves her standing there and goes to meet magnus who is waiting a few steps way. He puts the ring between them 

“this was my mom’s” he gently slips it on magnus finger. The ring its self was beautiful, a rose gold band with a Dimond embedded on the inside of it. It was his moms ring, who had got it from her dad. It had always been too big for her but alec remembered it hanging around her neck from a chain in order to keep it close. She had left it for him after she died, because she hoped one day he would give it to his girlfriend, when alec had realized that it was never going to happen he told izzy to take it instead. It was something else to see magnus wearing it. When magnus looks up at him alec thinks that for the first time In his whole life he might be speechless

“its beautiful, but alec your mom—"

“my mom wanted me to give it to the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with” he placed a kiss on top of his hand, hes sure izzy was crying somewhere behind them but for a second no one else but the two of them existed “now lets go show your dad who hes really messing with” he wraps his arm around him in the most flashy way possible and walks through the door

He immediately sees him standing in the back, sees jonathans blond hair and Als tall figure, to his surprise he sees Doms blue hair too. Great. He makes sure the everyone can see the ring on his own finger as they both walk to the other side of the gym together. Al turns to see them first

“long time no see son” Al says as the two join the group, alecs hand moving to magnus back

“what is this all about?” alec asks, ignoring Als earlier words. He doesn’t miss the way that Als eyes are like ice when they turn to him or the way he seems a little surprised that they are together, they all do

“and Alexander, im glad to see your recovering so well” the words hang in the air since everyone knows the people who did It are standing in the room expect all of them act like it   
was a mystery

“me too” his words are cold, zero emotion in them. He turns to his dad

“what’s this all about?” his dad has a surprised smile on his face when alec sees him notice the new addition to his hand. He points to Al, making them all turn to face him 

“Well the fight was set for four weeks from now but something on our side has come up” he feels magnus take a breath beside him, there was something really wrong about what was happening “so we are here to tell you that it has been moved forward by two weeks” all the air leaves alec as he watches the wicked smile play at Doms lips who knew very well that magnus was not at weight . he watches Al look directly at magnus “I understand if you need to surrender” he grips the fabric of his shirt tighter, wanting nothing more than to land a punch straight into Als jaw. He felt sick with how messed up this was. They only wanted to move it up because they thought that they had broken up and were trying to catch them both off guard

“sounds perfect to me” magnus says, his eyes not moving from his dads. It did not sound perfect, nothing about this sounded perfect unless magnus was just not going to eat for the next two weeks

“great, weigh ins will be the Thursday, fights Friday” alec looks at his dad as though to save him from this, but there is nothing he can do, this was magnus decision. He looks to jonathan who seems to be looking at alec the same way, something tells him that Jonathan was not as on bored as they would have liked him to be. 

“cant wait” magnus fold his arms in front of him, making sure the ring on his own finger is exposed. Alec sees the way they all see it. 

“well that’s something I never thought Id live to see” his dad remarks, looking to alec, “pity, you could have done so much better” before anyone can react he is walking away, Jonathan and Dom in toe. The second they are out the door he feels magnus lean against his as though all the energy is suddenly gone from his body. Alec turns to him

“you’re a dumb ass you know that” he hears the panic in his own voice, as far as he knew magnus was still 10 to 15 pounds overweight and they had under two weeks to do it. Magnus leans his head against alecs chest in defeat

“I know” he doesn’t fight it, knowing exactly what he just signed himself up for. It wasn’t only the weight cut making alecs head spin, it was the fact that they just lost two weeks, two weeks that they were allowed to have each other. Alec had no illusions that the fight was going to be fair, that something horrible wasn’t going to happen, the chances of magnus walking away were small and they all knew it. Alec felt it in the way that magnus griped at him as though realizing it himself. They had two weeks, it felt like a bomb had landed on his happy mood. Only then dose he remember that his dad is awkwardly standing beside them still

“what do we do” alec says, searching his dads eyes for an answer. He watches him run a hand over his face

“well we get him down to weight I guess” his eyes turn to magnus “I apologize in advance for how shitty this is going to be for you” he feels him lean into his side again, suddenly having no shame with public affection, his dad not seeming to even care. Weird. Alec thinks back to when magnus said he and Rob had searched for him together and think that they must be more to the story. 

“its my fault anyways” magnus places a quick kiss to alecs cheek before taking his bag and walking to the change room sadly, knowing exactly how shitty his life was going to become 

“Izzy said you guys were fighting?” his dad asks confused while pointing at the ring 

“we were, and then we weren’t , and then I don’t know really how we got here” his words are honest, his mind not rally paying attention to the conversation. Until his dad puts a hand on his shoulder

“is It what you want?” he cant help but smile, this was a conversation he never thought he would be able to have 

“more then anything” his dad smiles grow and he brings him in to a quick hug 

“then im happy for you guys” he pulls away and alec wants to cry at the life he is living right now, how it goes from hopeless defeat back to bliss in seconds is really starting to be a   
lot. But his dad saying he was happy for them was something he would remember forever

“that means a lot dad” and it does, more then he could ever know. 

“I trust that you know what to do, I’m going to try and get some sleep, ill see you guys later” his dad gives him a pat on the back before walking out the doors, leaving alec alone with a room of fighters who had no idea what’s going on. He doesn’t wait for magnus to start the class, knowing that he would jump in when needed. 

“someone looks a lot better” Alec looks to see a man named Jax smiling. Jax had been training a while and he was a nice guy. Alec smiled at him 

“feeling a lot better” he cant help playing with the ring, a part of him wants to scream the words IM GOING TO MARRY MAGNUS BANE to every single person he comes across. Jax takes notice of his fidgeting

“oh no shit man!!” he gives alec a hug before pulling away, alec loves the excitement on his face “no wonder you feeling better”

“its pretty great” he was supposed to be the big scary coach but he couldn’t stop smiling liken an idiot. when the last person lines up Jax moves back and alec bows the class in and they start running, alec choosing to sit in the chair now at the front as standing for long periods of time where still not his thing. At some point magnus slips in and joins them, alec sees jax give him a pat on the back as he runs by. 

“alright guys, we have someone fighting in two weeks which means everyone gets to work extra hard” no one complains, the whole gym buzzing with the exactment of a fight. Alec knew what It felt like to be the one they were all exited for, when one person fought it was like the whole gym was going into battle, they all knew what it was like so they were always there to help each other. Magnus had become one of them without alec even realizing it. He watched as the class ran sprints and did a warm up that made him tired just by watching it; ten suicides (start at one end of the gym, then run to the center, then back to the beginning, then run to the end of the gym and back and that’s one) then one hundred kicks per leg on the beg, then ten more suicides, then a hundred and fifty kicks per leg, then ten more suicides then two hundred kicks per leg. When they were done that he mad them partner up, one partner getting a thai pad (which is basically ten pounds of hard leather). The drill was simple, partner one dose a sit up, followed by partner B slamming the thai pad down on their abs as hard as possible. Alec made them do these things when he didn’t have to train because he hated them, not able to count the amount on times that the pads had left huge bruises and cuts down his stomach, he gave magnus a smile as he started 

“I want magnus to do a hundred and fifty” he hated how fun this might be. 

By the time the class had finished his hell of a warm up they all looked like they were going to die, magnus looking better then most of them since he had been heavily building his cardio but still dying none the less.

“alright guys we are going to do a shark tank so gear up” he heard them all groan, each person taking a moment to count how many people were in class. There were at lest twenty. The basic idea of a shark tank is someone stands in the middle of the gym and dose thirty second rounds of sparing with each person until they have gone through everyone, he made sure that magnus was last so that by the time it was magnus chance to stand in the middle and fight for ten minutes he would have already gone through everyone.   
It was a long class, one that left everyone moaning and sitting on the floor. It was far to early for this alec thought as he took the last sip of his coffee. He was going to need more of those. Magnus walks over to him one the class has bowed out

“you’re a dick” his words are slow as he is still trying to catch his breath, he sweat though his tank top, alec is suddenly glad that he brought a couple of them.

“and your disgusting” he really was. Magnus moves closer as if to prove that point. He dident care that the gym was filled with fighters who were watching them, hes sure they all knew and if they didn’t then they would soon. Alec moves to get up “im going to get grab another coffee, and some food since the next class doesn’t start till 12:30, then lets make a plan” he doesn’t ask magnus id he wants to go with him because he needs to do his bag work before the next class “ill know if you don’t do all your knees” 700 was the magic number, 700 knees, yeah it’s a good thing he tied him down now. Alec places a kiss on his forehead before walking out the door.   
A part of him feels bad when he gets back to the gym and starts eating his sandwich in front of magnus who hasn’t eaten at all yet. Alec hands him half of a gluten free garden wrap that he found, not exactly on his diet but its short notice. Magnus eats it without complaining. They go upstairs for a bit of privacy and take out some paper

“okay so we have 9 days to get you to weight” the silence around them is as hopeless as the words themselves 

“14.3 pounds to be exact “ magnus says matter of fact, taking a sip of water 

“well enjoy the water your drinking because for this week you can’t drink more then two liters a day, and then five days from now we will cut it down to 500mls and then as always two days before we will cut most water out completely” water cuts suck, there was no way to make them better, they were just horrible. “and food wise not much is in your future” it was a fine line because if your body went into survival mod it was next to impossible to lose the weigh because you would hold it, but if you ate to much then you also wouldn’t lose it. “lunch has to be the biggest meal of the day, dinner lets just do a small salad with lots of protein” alec had no idea what he was doing, only saying the things that usually worked for him. he looked up and saw how sad magnus eyes looked, a feeling that alec knew well. 

“what normally works for you?” magnus has done this just as many times as him. he sighs, leaning his head on his water bottle like a kid

“I always end up in a garbage bag running sprints all night” he knew even know that it was where he was going to end up. Alec grabbed his hand as though to offer him some sort of comfort. Training was hard on a normal bases, let alone with all the other shit happening in his life

“well then lets try to get as low as possible before that” alec put his sandwich down, In the moment deciding to give him as much solidarity as possible “I hate to say it but your life is the gym right now, there’s the morning class, lunch class and then afternoon class that you can do, after each class I want 700 knees and pad work, at night you should have a hot bath and all that stuff to cut” he hated it as much as magnus did, since his dad was sick it was seeming that alec was going to be the hard ass and put magnus through this. Magnus nods his head, not fighting

“Im going to apologize in advance for the ass hole I’m about to become” he leans his head against alecs shoulder and they are silent for a moment, taking a second before the storm to just be. He knew that training brought out the worst in people, seen families ripped apart by it because if you’ve never done it its impossible to fully understand it

“im going to apologize now for how much your going to hate me sometimes” alec looks around at the small room that he had grown up In, the couch that pulled into a bed, the little kitchen. When his dad first got the gym they had lived in this room, unable to afford a separate place to live. “you know, we might as well just live here” it would be helpful, that way they could train around the clock, magnus could sleep as much as he could and they would be in it, no distractions, no one would know where they were either “your dad cant find us here” . magnus lifts his head to look around at the small room 

“of course you had to have a small apartment in your gym.” He lets out a little laugh before nodding his head. This was going to be the hardest two weeks of their lives

That night after the last class they made their way back home. They needed to collect their stuff, make some meals, gather some clothes before they could live upstairs at the gym. As much as alec didn’t want to he knew it was the best thing. He had done it lots of times for fight because everything was there. They had a bathroom down stairs with a tub in it, there was a Sunna with a treadmill in the back, the gym ites self was high tech and nice and they were going to be there a lot, might as well call it home for the time being 

“how about you pack and ill cook so that we can get a little sleep tonight” they were no use in trying to go to bd right now, after training like that your mind didn’t just fall asleep, it took hours sometimes for your body to wind down enough. Magnus nodded, visibly exhausted and headed to have a quick shower first. Alec headed to the kitchen. Meals were horrible to prep, he hated it when it was him eating them and he hates it now that its magnus eating them but there was nothing he could do. when he had been talking to Dom they had come up with some meal plans, and although he was working for Al, the food checked out. Alec throw some bananas and oats into the blender with a couple of eggs, wanting to make enough to last them a week. He had found this recipe for something that almost resembled a pancake, except it was only a banana and oats. A couple of them rolled up with natural nut butter was the perfect breakfast. Lunch was where all the carbs for the rest of the day came in, brown rice or for a treat a boiled potato, dinner was a spinach salad with chicken, peppers, avocado, zucchini, and that was it. He started putting things in containers, making it easy to transport to the gym. He packed some more food for himself knowing that no matter how much he tried he wouldn’t be able to stick to magnus diets for more then a couple days. While all the different things cooked he walked around to find some different things that they might want; a deck of cards, A couple different books, really anything that would make having to sit in a hot bath a little bit easier, it was all about distractions, other wise you wanted to pull out your hair. Those baths, well they were like your own personal hell, something alec is almost glad he doesn’t have to do. he walks around the corner and cant help the little laugh that runs through him at the sight infront of him. magnus is laying on the bed, t-shirt in hand as thought he was in the middle of packing but it was just to much effort, he really was tired. He walks over, lifting him up a little bit in order to push him up on the bed to the proper spot, moving the blankets so that he was all tucked in like a child. Alec could pack, magnus needed the sleep. He moves under his hands, leaning in to his touch 

“sorry” he murmurs like he is trying to get himself to walk up

“go to sleep” he rests his hand on his face, he loved this person more then he had words to say. He would stay up all night to pack and get them ready. Magnus doesn’t fight with him, already going back to sleep happily. Alec knew how hard the next couple of weeks where going to be, how It was going to talk everything out of both of them in order to get to the finish line. He doesn’t move away immediately, taking a second to watch him. two weeks, they had two weeks left, the thought alone enough to make him want to wrap his arms him and keep him hidden forever, away from the world who was trying to hurt them. When this was all over they needed to get away, needed to go somewhere only they would know about. He wants to fall into bed beside him but he has things to do.   
He walks back to his food on the counter, sending a quick group text to simon, izzy and jace:

“magnus has to fight in 2 weeks. We are going full fight mode so ill see you all in two weeks” 

He needs them all to stay away, no distractions of that kind to get in the way. It was going to be a long two weeks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor Magnus, his life is about to suck so bad. the next couple parts are going to get into fighting a little bit more and what the weeks before a fight can look like, get into weight cutting a little bit because of its crazy and horrible but interesting if you have never had to do it! i hope you guys liked this chapter and leave kudos and comments as always!


	13. THIRTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!! this chapter is a bit long and gose into what its like to cut weight right before a fight and how horrible it can be, i hope you like it and find this little look into the fight world intresting!!

Tuesday

The first week went faster than either of them could have imagined, before he knew it there was two days until they had to leave and he wanted to run. Magnus still had to cut at lest ten pounds, and alec couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that their life could be so different a week from now, who were they going to be then? He didn’t let himself think about it too much as magnus walked into their makeshift home upstairs. He falls beside where alec is sitting

“that sucked” his dad was back teaching which gave alec more time to pack their stuff for Florida, get a game plan. He ran a hand through magnus hair, wishing he could somehow make it easier for him. but this week was the hardest 

“I know” magnus moves so that his head is resting in alecs lap, closing his eyes. He did this a lot these days, sometimes being to tired to do anything but lay there trying not to fall apart. “lets get this over with” alec says leaning down to plant a kiss on his forehead before moving so that magnus was by himself. 

These hot baths were proving to be the hardest part, alec now having to sit with him because a few days ago he almost died when he passed out in the water from dehydration. Magnus just nods his head, getting up and walking down the stairs to get the water running, alec following close behind. It took a while to fill the bath to where it needed to be, magnus leaning against him as though he could catch a few more moments of sleep. It was killing alec to see his dark eyes. He had been eating less food every day, the water down to horrible levels but he hadn’t had to run in a garbage bag yet so that was still to come. Magnus didn’t say anything, not one for words the longer this goes on. Alec turns the water off, throwing in three cups of sea salt, the very act making his chest alight with anxiety from all the times he had sat in them, too dehydrated to even cry. It was a rough sport sometime. Magnus doesn’t move from where he sits on the floor. Normally you got your last energy boost the week before the fight because the end goal is finally in sight, the excitement about the fight giving you the push you need in order to continue the hardest part of the fight camp but this was different. Neither of them felt excitement only dread, like these next 2 days were the last ones they were going to get. It was a lose lose situation that alec couldn’t think about. He walks over to give magnus a hand up before he sits down in the steaming water. The water was hot enough that if you moved it felt like your skin was crawling off

“next time I say that I want to fight, just say no” he jokes but there is nothing behind the words. Alec sits on the floor beside him, trying to offer him as much support as possible. He sets the timer on his phone for forty minutes. It was already stuffy and hot, those forty minutes could feel like hours. Magnus closed his eyes, taking deep breaths, he feels like shit. He hadn’t drank anything since five, before the last class and now that was almost five hours ago. He was allowed to drink something after he weighed in tonight. 

“I agree” this was hard on alec too because he had to be the mean and scary coach. He leans his head on the edge of the tub, he himself tired “its almost over though” yeah but what were they walking into when it was? As much as this sucked it could be considerably better than what would happen on Saturday, neither of them say that of course

“it is” they are loaded words, alec doesn’t show the way it feels like someone is putting an elastic band around his heart. They sit in silence for a moment, neither of them knowing what to say

“where do you feel fear?” its something that alec thinks of on the spot as he feels the terror sitting under his ribs like a weight dragging down every breath. Magnus looks at him like he has said something crazy 

“what do you mean where do I feel fear?” his voice is more aggressive than it should be but alec ignores it

“I mean, think of when you are really, truly afraid, where do you feel it?” alec had never really thought about it before until a few months ago izzy had made some comment about how she feels true and utter fear in her knees, he thought she was crazy but it was something that would at lest take magnus mind off of his current situation. when magnus still doesn’t answer alec places a hand to his ribs “when I am really scared it feels like someone has hits me in the ribs” a hint of understanding seems to run across magnus face

“what a freak” he takes his hands out of the water, watching the way steam comes off of them “I feel it in my hands, its as though someone has electrocuted me and it shoots all the way up my arm” the words are fascinating to alec, its crazy how so many people can experience the same emotion completely different. Alec takes his hand, running his thumb over the bruised and cut knuckles of a fighter. 

“that is very cool” at least all the salt in the bath would be good for his muscles “what about happiness, joy, where do you feel that?” alec had to think a moment about where he himself felt it, and realizes that it lived in his stomach, the warm feeling that crawls into his chest and engulfs him like a blanket. Magnus takes a minute to think about it before answering, bring the hand that alecs not holding to the back of his neck 

“here, it goes up my neck, making my head feel overwhelmed and warm” magnus smiles “the exact opposite of what I’m feeling right now” yep, there is was 

“if you’re going to pass out, don’t try and tough it out just tell me” magnus laughs a little at that but nods his head. Alec himself dient know how long they were going to make it, the room feeling more suffocating every second. Think of the hottest, most painful sauna you have been in, its like that

“what about sadness, heartbreak?” magnus asked. He had lots of experience with that recently for sure, but it was harder to pin down the exact place that it came from

“my chest I think, it starts there and makes me feel like I can’t breath, like all of a sudden there is something pressing down on it” its like panic without the panicking part, its empty and hallow, he hates it. Magnus holds his hand tighter 

“what about love?” alec smiles. 

“everywhere, in every nerve, limb, bone, I feel love everywhere” magnus smile at him,

“me too” they sit in silence for a minute, alec checks his phone and hopelessly see its only been ten minutes. 

“I must be feeling a lot of it right now to sit in here with out for the next thirty minutes”

“oh you mean you don’t love sitting in a suffocating steamed filled room?” he goes over to grab the containers of salts and things and places them on the small table beside the bathtub so that his phone could prop up against it. 

“funny, what do you feel like watching today?” he goes through Netflix, trying to find something long enough that they wouldn’t have to stop it. He ends up putting on some random tv show that has thirty-minute episodes so that they knew after one that he could have a shower and move on. The cold shower was almost worse then the bath. Your body was at such a high temperature and then when you then had an ice cold shower there were a couple moments where you cant breath or think and kind of feel like you are going to die. He tries to focus on whatever stupid thing is happening on the screen but the seconds feel like hours, he sees magnus closing his eyes and taking deep breaths, most likely willing himself to stay calm. If your heart rate went up at all more then it was you were pretty screwed. Alec just holds his hand, knowing there was nothing he could do to make it better somehow. He knew exactly what magnus was feeling and it was horrible, you just want to run, in the moment you don’t care about the fight or whos depending on you because you feel like you are either going to throw up, pass out or just combust into nothing. He looked at magnus, making note of how dark the skin under his eyes is from dehydration. If he could alec would call the whole thing off right now. 

By the time the episode ended magnus was just staring at the screen with blank eyes, he looks exhausted to say the lest. Alec put the phone away, thankful himself that they could finally open the door and let the steam out. He put a towel over to toilet seat so that magnus had somewhere to sit down while the water drained out, got another towel for him to use, not that he would want anything against his skin for awhile due to heat. He moved to the edge of the bath tub, looking down at magnus sadly, reaching a hand down towards him. magnus was going to come real close to passing out the second he stood up. Magnus reaches for him, letting alec help him up and quickly sit him back down on his make shift seat. Alec hurries to take the plug out of the tub, somehow willing the water to drain faster. He sits in front of where magnus is stilling, holding his head between his hands. Alec can see how pale he is, knows that his world is spinning around right now. Magnus reaches out with one hand to grip alecs neck as though he needs something solid to hang on to. Alec knows better then to try and touch him right now, that his body is in such hyper heated mode that anything touching you made it worse. But he sat there letting magnus ground himself In him, wanting nothing more then to make it go away 

“deep breaths” he says, he can basically feel what magnus is feeling right now as though he himself is feeling it, the tingles of anxiety living in his chest but there was more important things to worry about right now. Magnus takes breath after breath, he can feel him shaking from his grip on his arm. He looks over to see the water just above halfway empty. He needs to think of something to talk about, something to try help him. the ring around his finger gives him an idea

“I think we should just keep these rings instead of trying to find new ones” he looks down at at his, It might not be traditional but neither where they “cause you know, I don’t think we will ever find ones that sum up are relationship more then this” magnus smiles slightly, alec takes it as a win. Magnus lifts his head to look at him slightly, alec wanted to cry at how weak his face looked 

“I think there perfect too” he says softly before putting his head back down, closing his eyes. Alec felt so helpless in the moment but knew this is what had to be done. The water was   
basically out of the tub, alec didn’t waste any time before turning the shower head on as cold as it could go before turning back to magnus 

“lets get this done with” he helps him up slowly, giving him a second once standing up for the world to stop spinning. Magnus just nods his head before stepping into the shower, taking a quick breath as the water hits him. alec waits a moment to make sure magnus wasent going to pass out before quickly running upstairs to their room to grab him a pair of shorts to throw on once he was done. It usually took about six to ten minutes for you to cool down and although at first it seems like you cant breath for the first half of it, once you get used to it your body almost craves it after being so hot. He grabs a bottle of water and dumps half of it in a cup so that magus can drink something once he has weight in. when he finds his way back down stairs he finds magnus back on the make shift chair, trying to dry his hair as quickly as possible. Alec hands him a pair of thin shorts, the same thing he will weigh in wearing to see where his weight it as. magnus gives him a smile before putting them on.

“the world has stopped spinning” he says trying to make the mood a bit lighter but his voice was so thin, nothing behind it . 

“well that’s good” alec pushed a hand through magnus hair to test how wet it is and is relived to find out that its dry, thank god magnus hair dried fast. Alec moves to get the scale out and tests it with a weight to make sure that it was correct before motioning for magnus to come over. Alec could feel the tension in the room, there was nothing more hopeless then getting on scale after all of that and seeing that you had lost nothing, alec remembers even gaining weight after that before. he knows that magnus has had some problems cutting weight in the past so he cant help the nervousness to his mood

“okay, don’t look” magnus gets on the scale, listening to alecs instructions and not looking down at the scale, it was better in magnus dident know sometimes. The weight comes up and alec wants to cry, he had lost one single pound, one only. One. He still had nine to go. He takes a breath before looking at magnus “well on the bright side you didn’t gain anything” magnus lets his head hang in defeat and steps off the scale, letting himself fall against the wall. There was nothing more defeating then this moment because no matter how hard you tried you couldn’t fight your body and what it wanted to do. he sits down beside him

“our flights Thursday with the weigh ins that night so we have one day to get you down to weight” magnus sipped the water like it was the most precious thing in the world. “so enjoy that water cause that’s all you get for awhile. ” magnus nods his head, feeling more defeated then every before .He stood up to get them off the floor, thinking that if they waited any longer magnus may never get off the floor. “come on” he pulls magnus up to his level and leads him back up the stairs to the small room, the stairs taking longer then they should of but alecs sure magnus is sore. He leads them to the bed, magnus lays down carefully, pushing his face into the pillow. Alec doesn’t try to get anything down right now, he himself tired. He lays down beside him, magnus immediately curling up beside him. he can feel how hopeless they both feel right now . if he had any extra water hes sure that magnus would cry, alec sure wanted to

“just think about how amazing that first coffee is going to be on Thursday” he runs a hand up and down magnus back, his skin still incredibly hot

“coffee and a slice of cake” that made alec laugh

“cake?” that was a new one

“I would kill in cold blood for a piece of cake right now” his eyes were closed, alec could hear him drifting to sleep

“isent there a little dinner in the hotel?” ah the big hotel that he never wanted to go back to ever again. It was a sick joke that that’s where the fight would take place, one that hes sure Al is not missing the irony of

“yeah” magnus voice is so small, alec holds him a little tighter

“I think they had cake” his voice is barely above a whisper. He didn’t like to be alone these days, the most time he was alone the more time that he had to think about what was going to happen to them, to magnus this weekend. He knew that they really should talk about it but even bringing up the idea of it going wrong seemed impossible when they were trying so hard to make it right,. Maybe it was impossible to think about the worst and still go on every day, but realistically there were things they needed to talk about, alec could not even begin to imagine the fear running through magnus mind right now, he had no idea how to was doing it, he thinks that if it were him he would have already given up. 

Wednesday

If they thought the hot baths were bad it was nothing to what the next day held. that morning when he walked down the stairs and saw magnus sitting on the floor blankly staring at the heavy bag he knew there was nothing he could do to somehow make this easier. He went to the desk to check some emails and calls, no one has to know that deep down he hopes someone will be asking for him, he misses fighting in waves, sometimes he thinks hes okay with It and that he can accept his new plot in life but other times it feels as though he cant breath when he thinks of the fact that he might be done, maybe when this whole thing was over him and magnus would be able to sit down and talk about it, about what there future was going to look like. Alec dident want to only be known as an old fighter, he wanted to do something for himself, something that no matter what happened no one could take away from him. he looks at magnus putting his all into his kicks and cant help but think that maybe he already has.

The day goes on like normal, alec more out of it than before. magnus eating nothing, drinking only enough to not pass out, he knew that the real struggle was going to be the late class. The last class of the night wasn’t like normal ones, it was a class that was specifically designed for fighters, made up of people who had or wanted to fight. It was the only class that wasn’t drop in, you had to be invited in order to attend because they trained hard and long, the only people able to keep up are people who have a goal like fighting In mind. It also meant that the people who attended were a team, a real team who were like a family. He watches as they start to walk in, wearing team gear that only they had earned the right to wear. Jace walks in with Clary on his arm. He runs over to alec, leaving clary to sit down 

“dude what the hell Izzy told me that your getting married” it had been to long since he had sat down and had a drink with jace, the last time really being in Florida but he had gotten busy, life had gotten crazy. A part of him wanted to stay away from everyone he cared about while Al was gunning for them, but it felt like a piece of him was missing when he thinks about his family who he hasn’t seen enough of. He holds up his hand to show jace the ring

“yeah, yeah I am. It’s a long story” one he doesn’t feel like going into right now. Jaces eyes are wide like he cant quite believe what’s going on as he turns around until his eyes find magnus, who was sitting in the corning throwing up layers of clothing 

“Bane!!” magnus looks up, everyone else following his move “you were supposed to ask me for permission dude what the hell!!” the people laugh as magnus flips him off, turning back to his layers. He looks like a walking marshmallow with his ten layers of clothing to be honest “I cant believe you didn’t tell me” 

“I wanted to but then we found out that magnus is fighting on Friday like the same day and I got caught up” he places a hand on his shoulder

“I get it, I just wish you would isolate yourself” jace has no idea the things at play right now, has no idea the amount of danger he could be in, hell Alec didn’t even know the full of it

“when this is all over I intended to get really drunk with all of your guys” alec says honestly, and he dose, no matter how it ends. Jace laughs but agrees before the group starts to line up. 

Magnus really dose look like a marshmallow with legs, alec has to stop himself from laughing when he sees him walk onto the floor. Now there were sauna suits available that were sleek and nice but they didn’t work as well as this. This was cutting a hole in a extra-large garbage bag and wearing it like a dress underneath as many layers as you possible could get on, he was even sporting socks and a hat

“as you guys can all see, magnus is still fat which means we all get to cut weight tonight” they groan but smile in support, all of them knowing exactly what it feels like to be him 

“your welcome guys” magnus says trying to keep the jokes coming but they all feel how forced they are. 

“so tonight, is going to be a sweaty one, I hope for the sake of each other you all brought extra clothes” alec looks to a tall guy named Jordan “im looking at you specifically” this guy sweat like no other person he had ever meet. They once had to stop class because people where slipping in this guys sweat and it was a safety hazard. The rest of the class agrees with a laugh since no one really cared about things like sweat at this point. He looks at the ten people in front of him, its incredible that they were all here like this, all of them so different from each other, none of them had any right to met each other but here they were, he cant help but look at the girl named Morgan who was no older then sixteen yet fit in seamlessly with the adults around her. He loved the fact that magnus had found something like this because alec knows that he hadn’t had it before. he bows them in quick 

“alright, so pair up, I want one person on the bag, the other is just going to run sprints until the person on the bag has done two hundred kicks, and we are going to repeat that until your sweating” he sits down heavily on the chair, not wanting to be here at all. His entire life had been the gym, he couldn’t wait for it to all be over. He had decided that the second they got back they were going on a trip, somewhere they didn’t have to think about the gym or crazy families, they could just be together. 

It took less then five minutes for magnus to start sweeting which was good, this was what alec had been fearing, he didn’t know if he would be able to make magnus keep going when he was on the verge of passing out. The class groaned and complained but keep going for thirty minutes, longer then alec thought they would go but they all looked like they were on the verge of falling over. He thought about what he could make them do now

“lets do some quick rounds to get going, gear up” he watched Jax dramatically fall onto the ground, taking some deep breaths. Magnus doesn’t say a word to anyone, just walks over and kneels on the ground to calm down, he was sweeting a lot, you could see it running down his back darkening the fabric. That was a good sign. The class lines up in pairs as alec sets the Timmer

“magnus is fighting this week so if anyone hurts him, im getting my gloves and I promise I will kick your ass” he sets the timer as they go.  
Other then that the class is pretty ordinary, alec not being able to pay attention to anything else then how pale magnus is. The worst part was that this was not even the worst part, no because as soon as the class bowed out it was time for magnus to sweat until he couldn’t sweat anymore. He walks over to jace

“can you hold pads for him?” he asks jace because magnus knows him, wont feel like he has to be strong in front of him. jace nods without hesitation, already going over to grab the pads. He takes a moment, walks over to wear magnus is sitting against the wall, he was basically like a walking pool at this point, more sweat then human. he knees in front of him, making magnus open his eyes

“how you doing?” he asks gently, making himself look at him, look at how horrible he looked. the bones in his face were the biggest show of his weight loss, all of them sticking out in a way that alec wanted to make disappear.. he nods his head as a response.

“jace is going to hold rounds for you, then we will check your weight” 

“fuck you” he says making alec laugh, placing a hand on his face

“yeah love you too” he gets up to reset the Timmer

It only took a few rounds for magnus to start fading. He was missing shots, getting hit more then he should have been, he looked horrible. Alec would have been worried If it were any other day but he knew that magnus was past his point and that this didn’t reflect his skill level but the sight itself was hard to stomach. He heard the round end and wanted to cringe at what was next; the kicking round. The kicking round was just horrible, it would make even the best guys weak. It started with ten fast and hard kicks on either side and when he says fast he means like within seven seconds fast, then it was ten double kids (two kicks counting as one) on either side, then ten more fast kicks per leg, then ten three kicks (three kicks count as one) on either side and then ten more fast and hard on either side, and you had four minutes to do It all. It was pretty shitty. Magnus starts the kicks, all of them hitting wrong and weak, if it were anyone else alec would have ripped them apart because they were just unacceptable but he just couldn’t make magnus do them again, his face was so sad 

“magnus those were shit and you know it. Alec might not be able to say it but I can so your going to do them again” alec moved over so that he was sitting far away from them thankful that jace could see through him. he couldent do it right now, he couldn’t tell magnus that it was wrong or bad because every second of it was breaking his heart. He wished that he could trade places with him because he would in a heartbeat. He watches magnus do the kicks again, harder and nicer this time. 

“good, other side lets go” jace was taking the roll of the big bad coach so that alec wouldn’t have to, he was more thankful for him then he would ever be able to say. The kicks seemed to go on forever, jace making him re do all the ones he didn’t think were up to par, magnus seeming to get worse every kick but even he knew that there was nothing he could do to stop it, they dident have a choice, this was what they had to do

“come on magnus your almost there” jace says when magnus closes his eyes, trying to calm down his breathing to no avail. He kicked again but even jace seems to soften a little bit,   
if nothing else this whole thing was gaining magnus respect with the entire gym. The last kick was the worst but no one had time to comment on it as magnus fell to the ground. Alec was at his side immediately, jace throwing the pads to the side to be whatever help he could. Alec realistically knew magnus was fine but dehydrated but in the moment all he felt was fear. Magnus leaned into him the second he felt that he was there

“what’s going on” he says in the gentlest voice he can, running his eyes over magnus to asses him. 

“just on the verge of dying” he grips onto alecs shirt the same way he did the night before in the bath

“you did great man” jace says, putting a hand on his shoulder in support, looking at alec as though asking him what to do, alec gives him a gesture that makes him walk away, putting the pads back on the shelves, if magnus was in trouble he was not going to tell jace about it

“what’s really going on?” he says once jace is out of range

“I haven’t eaten in two days and drank about a cup of water and I think I just sweat out my body weight, what do you think is happening” there is an edge to his voice that alec ignores because magnus is still attached to his side

“I think the world around you is spinning and your body finally gave up” its exactly what happened, magnus was passing out and alec couldn’t even give him some water or food, not until he weighed in, otherwise the whole thing would be for nothing. 

“I don’t want to do this anymore” the words are more of an admission then they had any right to be, “alec I can’t do it” it was the first time that magnus had let his own fears out, having stayed the strong one out of the two of them through this whole thing but right now he was sitting on the floor in a plie of sweat looking more broken then he had ever seen him. his breath was coming out quicker then it should be, panicking was only going to make it worse. he moves away and starts taking off some of his layers in a panic like the idea of having them on him in more then he can bare

“magnus stop” he was going to hurt himself, alec knew he would be crying if he had any tears left

“I cant—I cant do it” alec grabs his hands, forcing him to stop in his quest for freedom and that’s all it takes before he completely falls apart, falling into alecs arms. He cant help him, cant make him feel better but god he wishes that he could, he would give up anything to stop this “I don’t want to do this” the words come out of his mouth like a mantra that he cant stop, the words having been living on his tong for days or weeks “im not going to be the one to walk out of the ring, its going to be him” the words break the last wall of defense that alec had been holding together, making him drop his own face into magnus hair, digging his fingers into magnus back. “Im sorry, im so sorry” alec cant physically hold him any tighter then he is right now as though somehow it will keep them together. He doesn’t want to say it, doesn’t want to think about it but they have to, they have to because its something they cant ignore. “I don’t want to do this” magnus own hold on him weak, showing how week he himself is. This is more painful than any fight alec had ever had, worse than anything he had ever gone through because there was nothing he could do. he didn’t know what to say, nothing could make it better and they both knew it. All he could do was hold him as he feel apart. 

“no matter what ill happens ill be there, ill be there, I wont let them hurt you” they were empty words, they both knew that there was nothing alec was going to be able to do once the bell went. “your going to walk out of there, I promise you” but he would do absolutely everything he could in order to save him, even if he took the blow himself he would gladly take it. He could feel magnus curling into him even more so that alec was cradling his shaking body. “I promise”

“you were right, I shouldn’t have done this” it hurt to hear it, magnus being so firm to believe that he was doing the right thing, it was a shot to the heart to hear him say the words now like this. Alec cant do anything to help him, but whether they like it or not they have to get on a plane tomorrow. Alec places a soft kiss on his forehead before magnus pulls away, taking a deep breath “if something happens—” alec shakes his head, he couldend have this conversation but magnus doesn’t stop “I have to say this, no reason to pretend its not real” he puts his hand on the side of alecs face “if something happens in the ring, don’t let him get away with it, tell everyone what really happened until the stop to listen” every word made alecs heart shatter a little bit more, he couldn’t believe they even had to have this conversation, but he couldn’t wish it away no matter how hard he wanted to . he leans his head against Magnus, unable to find the words to say when he feels magnus running his hand over his face “make them hear you. Don’t forget that I loved you more then I had the words to say—” the words are rushing out like suddenly its hitting him that there are still so many things he wants to say, yep no this needed to stop right now, this was a goodbye-last words speech if alec had ever heard it and he wasn’t going to have it. he pulls away from him, his own heart beating a thousand miles per minute, this was not how their story was going to end, he could think about it—couldn’t bare the idea of what he would do without him, without them being together. 

“don’t. your going to be alright. We are going to go back to our hotel room after and eat pizza and cake and—and be alright. We are going to be okay” he knew that he was saying the words more to himself, trying to convince him that they would somehow be alright in the end when they both knew it wasn’t going to be as easy as that, nothing ever was that easy when it came to the two of them.

He stood up, helping magnus to his feet at the same time. He moved his arms around him when he started to sway, leaning him against himself for suport “now lets see what your weight is at to see how much we have to cut still” he prayed to any god that might be listening to let it be close. They walk to the bathroom slowly, magnus not fully there. Alec knew the look on magnus face well, he himself had had to be almost carried to the scale before. somehow it always seemed worth it when it came down to standing in that ring. He helped move magnus to the shower, peeling away all the layers of soaking wet clothes, this part was going to suck, might wake him up though. he let go of magnus, walking over to get a towel and realized that magnus was really not doing well at all on his own. He knew what he was going to have to do and sent every curse word he could possibly think of at Al. 

“alright lets get this over with” he took off his own shirt quickly, not bothering with anything else and turned the water on cold. It was the same idea as the bath, shock your body with cold water but somehow it always felt so much worse after sweating in a garbage bag. Alec remembers the first time that he had done it when he was no older then 14 years old and had a complete panic attack in the shower because he couldn’t breath, it was a rough sport sometimes. He let magnus lean against him, keeping an arm around his middle to hold him up. He hears magnus sharp intake of breath, alec not loving the cold water but knowing magnus has it much worse. The only good thing about having to do this together was that alec could feel the second five minutes later that magnus body temperature was lower. He couldn’t help but think of the time magnus was sick and needed to drop the fever. He dident know what was worse in the moment. He moved them out of the shower, placing magnus onto the side of the tub while he quickly grabbed a couple towel. He was freezing and frustrated with what he didn’t know but frustrated none the less at their lives. He dried magnus off at quick as possible, wanting this to be over with now. When he was dry alec placed him on the scale

“look at me, don’t look down” they are the same words his dad had said to him when he was younger and trying to do this, he would never let alec see the weigh, knowing how crushing it was when you saw that you didn’t lose anything. He holds his breath as the scale dose its thing. He cant help but want to laugh at what it says 

“magnus ive never been a religious person,” he looks at him unable to keep the smile off his face, “but this makes me believe in god” he was at 136.0. not at weight but damn close. 

He immediately moves to go grab a horribly small sip of water, anything would be better then nothing 

“this means that we can go to bed for a couple hours. You’ll have to sweat out a little more in the morning but for now lets just call it a night” if magnus were doing better he might have suggested that he should have a hot bath or just get the rest of it out now but it was apparent he was not going to be able to do much like this. He lets magnus fall against him, wrapping his arms around his neck leaving alec to fully support him. for a minute they were given a moment of peace, a second to breathe before the next morning, both knowing that the next few hours where the last seconds of reality they would get.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so thats a little what cutting weight is like. i myself have done it many times, ive passed out in the middle of class and in baths, ive ran sprints in garbage bags to the point that i was so dehydrated that i could no longer cry and then had to go home and have a hot bath only to do it all again the next morning, cutting weight like that really is the hardest part of the sport that everyone hates. i hope you all liked this chapter! leave comments and kudos as always


	14. FOURTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!! sorry this is so late i had a killer migraine all week! we are getting closer to the fight though, weigh ins are just around the corner and things are about to get crazy for these two boys! i hope you all like this chapter

The next morning goes much like the night before, magnus putting on the thousand layers of clothes and bags trying to cut the last few pounds of weight before he passes out. Because they had to fly to Florida, it meant that even when after three hours magnus finally hit 130 pounds he couldn’t drink or eat anything because flying had a tendency to change how your body held water so it was better for everyone if he just waited until the weigh ins. The only problem was that weight ins weren’t until late tonight which meant nearly a full day without food and barely any water. 

Alec walks over to where magnus had sat himself on the floor after the final weigh in, to tired to make it back up and down the stairs

“the hard part is almost over” that was what he always said to fighters once he stopped panicking that they weren’t going to make weight. Although fighting was difficult and took everything out of you, it was also the fun part, the payoff for all the hard work you had just put in for month and months expect this time it wasn’t going to be like that at all. 

“the hard part hasn’t even begun yet” magnus says, keeping his eyes closed. He was at the point where the real world was to hard, the only way to get through it was to close your eyes and pretend that you were somewhere, anywhere else. Alec gently runs his hand over his face as though he was trying to catalogue every single detail about him. tomorrow night his world could be turned upside down faster than he could save it, faster than he could jump in and take the shot himself. The though along made him lean in closer to magnus, somehow trying to keep him as near as possible. It reminded him of when he was small and his dad would go away for a month in order to see some new gym or new fighter, weeks before alec would basically be glued to his side, followed him around everywhere he went as though he was trying to get as much time with him as he could before it was to late. Now the only thing he wanted to do was be with magnus, nothing else seemed important enough to drag him away for even a second because every second he was away was a second of lost time. Magnus leaned into the hand on his face like a cat in a movement that made alecs heart burst. He takes his phone out of his pocket and despite magnus protest takes a photo of the moment

“a month from now we are going to look at this photo and laugh at how crazy this was” alec says, trying to lighten the extremely heavy feeling blanketing both of them. ‘or its going to haunt me like a ghost for the rest of my life’ he thinks, not letting his mind go to where both of their minds lived now a days. 

“I can’t wait for that day” magnus opened his eyes slowly, the sun from the window making his skin turn to gold in the way alec couldn’t get enough of. He had always been beautiful. A small smile that has no right to be their slowly makes its way onto his face, alec doesn’t think he has seen him smile in days. 

“alexander do you remember when we were 19 and ran around town with the sense of invincibility only can teenagers can possibly have?” alec smiles himself thinking about the days when nothing was too big, when nothing could ever really go wrong. “like the time you stole something from the mean lady who worked at the corner store and she chased us down the street” ah yes alec remembers that quite well

“we had to hid in the dumpster” he says softly. It was bitter sweet thinking of the past, every word somehow feeling like a last reflection. It wasn’t time yet his mind screamed at him, they still had time 

“what would those two kids think if they could see us now?” alec takes magnus hand, running his finger over his mother’s ring. He couldn’t listen to this, magnus acting as though this was it for them, like they were never going to see each other again. He brings his hand up to his lips softly

“they would be proud of us, of what we have done and who where are, I know that I am” magnus looks at him with something bitter sweet. Today had been more emotional then most

“we did pretty good” there is something horrible about how resigned magnus voice comes out, as though he has already accepted his fate without trying to fight for it 

“stop talking as though this is the last two days on earth” he thinks back to the books magnus had made him read out loud to him over the past weeks, thinks of the one where a man had to sit and watch his lover die of disease while there was nothing he could do about it, yet even in the face of death and despair he found the courage to be brave, how every night he would pray to his gods and thank them for the life that he did have, the time that they got to spent together because he would rather have felt that even for a short time then never at all. If he could remain hopeful and thankful even when he had every right to fall down in despair then alec could at least pretend to not be as scared as he was. “you’re going to get into that ring tomorrow and fight like you have never fought before because you aren’t just fighting for yourself anymore magnus,” he keeps his hold on his hand, the feeling of the medal grounding him “your fighting for Izzy, for Jace, for my dad, for me. Your fighting for your family because we need you to be the one to walk out of there, I need you to magnus.” He sees his face soften up at his words, he means every one of them. He was tired of being sad, or feeling like the world was ending because it wasn’t. It felt like sometimes they were both stuck grieving things that had never happened yet to the point that they forgot they were still okay and together. “so we are going to get up, grab our bags and go to the airport because this is just another weekend, just another fight for the books and afterwards we are going to take a much needed vacation” he stood up, offering magnus a hand which he took. Alec made sure to keep his arm around him as he started to sway a little bit on his feet. He really wasn’t in the best condition right now but there was nothing they could do about it, everything these days felt like it was out of their control. A part of alec wants to just not get on the plane, to just run away while Al was waiting for them in Florida, but they both knew it would only be so long until someone found them, there really was no getting out of it this time. 

Unlike last time his entire family wasn’t going. Only him and his dad and magnus, his dad because he was magnus coach and they all knew if something happened in the ring alec would not be able to handle it alone. He needed his dad right now, needed someone to lean on when things got bad because he knew they were going to get bad. He walked them over to the front door where their bags were waiting for them and saw that his dads car was just coming to the curb, perfect timing at lest. They walk out the door and he notices that magnus looks back a final time as though wanting to remember it.

The drive to the airport Is fast, a part of him feeling like he just did this trip last weekend yet so much had changed in the past months. By the time they got through security and check ins magnus could hardly stand up, the actives proving to be a little bit more then he could handle right now. When they finally got to the gate magnus was practically depending on alec to hold him up. It was bad, but he had seen worse. Weight cuts had the chance to go to the extreme, he had once trained with a guy who was fighting for a world title and to get down to weight didn’t eat for six days, by the time he got to the event he had passed out in the lobby and had to go to the hospital instead of making the fight. Or even worse his dad had told him stories about back in the old days when he used to do strictly boxing he had known guys who had gotten blood removed from their systems right before a weigh in in order to lose the extra pound or ounce. There was nothing a fighter wasn’t willing to do to get to weigh and alec had seen it himself go horribly wrong, so magnus might be in bad condition but at could have been worse. 

He pretend not to see the way people eyed him as he walked to where they were supposed to wait, saw the walk they looked at magnus attached to his side, alecs own arm armed around him as though it was some move of rebellion instead of something as normal to him as breathing. His dad must have noticed it too because sudden he was walking in front of him as though he could shield them from the rest of the world. When they finally found a place to sit as they waited to board he took out the water bottle he had bought and handed it to magnus to sip on

“little sips” he says and magnus dose so, only drinking no more then two cap full of it before giving it back to alec, leaning into him as much as he could. Alec moved so that his arm was around him protectively as if daring the world to touch them. He felt magnus push himself closer. Alec knew that they were a crazy sight to see right now, anyone who had ever done a sport could see that they were athletes; with their four duffle bags that had gear falling out of them and team coats and hoodies that said fight team on them, but the sight of alec and magnus together like that was something that would throw them off completely. Alec liked the fact that they were a contradiction to what people thought fighters had to be.   
It felt like an eternity before the boarding process started, even longer for the line up to get on to be short enough for them to get up and stand in it without magnus wanting to pass out. Al had offered to fly them out first class but they had turned it down without a second though because they didn’t want anything from him, but when alec sat down in the little seat that had enough leg room if he didn’t move a muscle he almost wishes they had just said yes. He sits by the window, magnus in the middle and his dad on the other side. He could feel the same protectiveness towards magnus coming from his dad to, like somehow as long as they were both around him that he would be okay. In reality magnus was not the one who needed saving, he had dealt with the whole thing far better then alec had, alec who quiet regularly made it known just how afraid he was, magnus had just held him close and told him that they would be okay. Now it was his turn to do the same. The flight took off shortly after boarding which alec was thankful for, as soon as the no seat belt sign had been taken off magnus moved the arm rest that separated them and once again moved into alecs space as though he couldn’t deal with them being even centimeters apart, alecs arm once again going around him

“you know, I hate flying more then I hate most things but this is the first time in months when I have to do absolutely nothing and I have to say, its sort of wonderful” his voice was so weak, so quite but still him. alec himself didn’t like flying very much, he would much rather be on the ground driving but right now magnus and his dad where beside him and they were all okay. It didn’t take long for magnus breathing to even out against his chest, for him to finally get some sleep even if only for a few hours. He saw his dad look over at them with a smile

“he did good” his dad said quietly as though not to wake him. alec looks down at him fondly

“he did” magnus moves impossibly closer to him in sleep

“whatever happens in the next two days, im proud of you.” He looks down at magnus “both of you” the words are something that alec is going to hold close to his heart forever, his dads acceptance of magnus, of them together was more then he ever could have dreamed of but would die without. He couldn’t do this without them. His dad puts his head phones back on before alec has a chance to respond. 

The flight seemed shorter then it was, maybe because they were all hoping that it would never end. But magnus slept straight through until landing when he had to sit back up and put down the arm rest

“sleep well?” alec asks, trying his best to take his own mind off of landing. It was the one part he hated more then anything, thinking about all the shows he had watched where the planes went up in flames after a bad landing. He didn’t look out the window as magnus took his hand. 

“I did yeah” his voice was still soft as though he was not quite awake yet, still in that place between sleep and reality where everything is okay. “I dreamt about cheese” the words made alec forget his growing anxiety and laugh because he had had the same dream

“I remember one time I had to do a particularly bad weight cut, in the car on the way there I slept and all I dreamed of was running water” it makes magnus laugh purely at how real it was. Ever time he had to start on a new diet or something he always had vivid food dreams for the first week. 

“I already had that one” magnus pulls out the container of Vaseline that he kept in his pocket and puts his on his lips, an attempt to fool his mind into thinking that he wasn’t dying for some water. 

“its almost time, only a few more hours until weigh ins” it was currently almost one in the afternoon and weigh ins were at six. By the time they got off the plane and checked into their rooms there wouldn’t be much time left at all. 

Thankfully the plane lands nice and easy and they are in the car driving to the hotel within the hour. Alec was thankful that his dad had had the mind to rent a car for them, not wanting to have to deal with anyone else until he got settled down. It wasn’t quite as hot as it had been the last time they were there but it was warmer then they were used to, the hoddies and sweat pants they were wearing Definity to heavy, well maybe not for magnus. Cutting weigh always made you cold. this was really it. This big thing that had been sitting in the back of his mind, looking over them like a shadow was finally coming to life. They couldn’t run now. The drive to the hotel is quiet, magnus to caught up in his own world for conversations, choosing instead to sit as close to him as he can since alec was in the back with him. it didn’t feel right to be even that far away from each other right now. Unlike the first time they had driven up to the beautiful hotel, he was not in shock or awe, all he felt was dread. This was the place where it all began, it only made sense that this is where its all to end. This place is also the place where alec and magnus found each other again, something he will forever thank his lucky stars for but the place also sent anxiety shooting throw him, he knew magnus could feel it too, how real everything just became. His had parks the car but no one gets out for minute, knowing that the second they walk through the doors the real fight was going to begin 

“you ready?” alec asks, squeezing magnus hand tightly in his. Magnus looks like someone who has jumped off a bridge and half way down realizes what they have done. He looks at alecs dad who is looking at the two of them helplessly. Magnus nods his head before going to open the door

The lobby is as big as ever, swarming with people wearing suit and ties, people here for one thing or another. He sees the groups of fighters who are there for the card, all of them stop to watch as the two of them walk throw the doors together, alecs arm around magnus shoulders. Neither of them stop to talk to anyone, letting his dad lead them to the desk where the same young girl as the last time is sitting at the computer. It feels like its been a life time since he was last here but her face reminds him its been less then nine months. He sees her look up at them, look at magnus with some surprise on her face. Magnus gives her a nice smile, making her blush. Alec doesn’t pay attention to what they are saying to each other, instead looking around the room at the people, trying to see anyone he knew. He hadn’t gotten himself to look at the card before, not really caring who was on it but now he was looking around the room almost praying for a familiar face. he sees the guys from LA who he had helped corner a fight one time or another, sees the gym from Canada who show up to every fight they can get an invite to, his eyes meet the coach of the little girl from the last fight, Sandra. She sees him at the same time and gives him a warm smile, waving him over. He looks down at magnus who lets him go

“go make friends” alec places a kiss on the side of his head before running across the room to someone who knows him. he cant help the nerves that run through him, he hadn’t talked to her since before the fight but remembers how they were the first to stand up when everyone else was to afraid to.

“hi” he says as he reaches them. She looks to be with about three other people, he gives little Brenna a wave as her coach pulls him into a tight hug 

“hey kid” hes a little surprised but hugs her back, thankful to have someone on his side. She pulls back and looks towards her team “guys this is Alec lightwood” he looks at the group of fighters, recognizing none of them other then Brenna. “alec, this is Morgan, Kaitlynn and you already know Brenna” he gives them a nervous wave as brenna moves past her team mates to him 

“are you fighting on the card?” he asks her softly and she gives him a hug. He had met these people no more then twice but it was like he had always known them, it was like anyone who was at that fight had gone through something together that connected them all. 

“you bet I am” he didn’t love the idea of her fighting on a card run by Al, but he could feel that she had a lot of people looking out for her.

“I cant wait to see it” he moves to look at the adults who are all watching his every move. Hes about to say something when the guy, Morgan sticks out a hand to shake

“its nice to met you” alec shakes his hand, the girl beside him moving to shake his hand as well

“I watched your last fight in Florida, I thought it was the bravest thing I have ever seen” alec smiles at her words, letting go of a breath he hadent even known he was holding.

“thank you” he can feel a blush running up his face. it was weird to have someone on his side

“how is magnus doing, he ready?” Sandra says once the introductions are done. Alec turns to look at him leaning against the counter watching him 

“hes doing alright, the weight cut has been pretty rough but hes as ready as he will ever be” they all nod their head, all feeling the same things right now. Alec wishes he could protect them all from what was to come. He knows how crooked Al is there was no way there where going to be any fair fights tonight. “actually, can I have a quick word with you?” he asks the coach, pulling her away from the rest of her team, no need to make them more stressed out then they needed to be. He had to do anything he could to help them 

“what’s going on?” she says matter of fact, her face serious 

“this is Als card, so just be careful. watch your fighters, make sure they are together and not going off alone tomorrow because there is nothing that Al wont do to win and I know that your team are all fighting his guys. Watch then, especially brenna” he wishes there was more he could do for them, wishes he could hid them away from all the drama of what was going to happen. He thinks of the times that Als competition had to pull out due to injury before the fight, of gear destroyed and missing, they had to stay together if they had any chance of getting through this. She looks at her young team like a protective parent

“ill keep them together.” She looks back at him “I have a feeling there is a lot more at play then we know” she looks at magnus who Is now hanging onto alec dad, watching alec as though he is ready to jump into the fire if needed to “he watches you like he is waiting for disaster to strike, I don’t need to know the details, but if you guys need anything don’t hesitate to call me kid, we have you back” he wants to tell her everything, every fear that has been eating him alive every day, the fear that he has one day left with magnus before who knows what happens, but he doesn’t. Instead he gives her the best smile he can 

“thank you, truly thank you” she puts a hand on his shoulder before walking back to her team to tell them as much as she wanted to tell them, alec headed back over to magnus and his dad. 

“how are they doing?” he ask, moving back to his side the second he is close enough to do so. They all start walking towards the elevator, the same one they had gone up and down many times before

“they are good, they are all fighting tomorrow” no one answers, all of them feeling the same weight in their stomach as alec had. His dad hands him a hotel key

“its just past two thirty so go get settled and let me know what you two want to do, there is that grocery store down the block we should hit up before weigh ins but I can go alone if you guys just want to relax” his dad was being more supportive then alec thought he could be, maybe it was just the situation but he loved it anyways. 

“thanks dad, ill let you know” he and magnus go to one elevator, his dad to the other since they were in different towers. He feels magnus lean into him once the doors shut behind them, alec moving to face him 

“this seems hauntingly familiar” he says quietly, as though if the words were any louder they would break the moment. Magnus moves closer so they are mere heart beats away  
“worked out pretty well for us last time” magnus closes the distance, pressing his lips against alecs in something desperate that alec feels down to his very core. He moves his hand up magnus back to pull him closer 

“did it once, we can do it again” he says, not wanting any despair to slip into the moment, the moment they might not get many more of. They had no idea what was going to happen in the next two days, who they were going to be this time next week but alec knew in the moment whatever happened, no matter what they would do it together, they would face the horrors of the fight side by side the way they always had, maybe it would be enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> weight ins are the next chapter then they get to eat!!! and yes before you ask the dreams about food are very real. i hope you all liked this chapter and leave comments and kudos as always!


	15. FIFFTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!!!! we are getting close to the end of this whole thing!! i just wanted to thank you all for going on this crazy adventure with me and i hope you have enjoyed it as much as me!!!

He wanted to throw up by the time they got to the room, his mind not able to forget everything that happen to them the last time they were in these rooms. He took a deep breath as he opened the door. It was a nice room, far nicer than the last time. Magnus immediately goes over to the big bed in the center of the room and falls on it, leaving alec to deal with their bags and coats which he happily dose. He looks around, walking over to the balcony and opening the sliding door to get some fresh air into the room 

“my dad spared no expense on us” magnus says quietly from the bed, his eyes already closed. Its not so much that magnus needed to sleep or anything but more so it was the best way to pass the time. It was to hard to be awake all the time when your body was fighting so hard to just not pass out. Alec walks over to the bed, laying down himself. As different as the room was it was all to much the same 

“it’s the lest he can do really” he pulls magnus onto of him so that magnus head could sit on his chest. No one spoke for a minute, alec himself exhausted from lack of sleep. While magnus had gotten a few hours sleep last night alec had stayed awake, unable to get his mind to stop playing over the events that would follow. Eventually he got up and packed their bags so that in the morning magnus wouldn’t have to, got some work so that jace and Izzy would have no issues running things for a few days, over all he hadn’t really slept more then a few hours in the past couple days. 

“close your eyes” magnus says as though he can sense how hard alec is trying to stay awake. There were still things to do, he should go talk game plans with his dad, should go buy some food so that they were ready for tonight, should make sure he knew exactly what time everything was going to happen the next day. There were a thousand things to do but he didn’t want to do any of them 

“I should go talk to my dad” his words are soft; he just wants to lay there and never get back up 

“I think your dad can handle picking up some food, its you who I’m worried about” magnus holds onto him tighter as though daring him to move 

“im fine” he needed to be strong for the both of them, magnus had enough to worry about 

“I know you’re not, stay with me” he says and his words are blurred as though they are after thoughts but who is alec to say no? he lets his eyes close softly, but only for a minute

He wakes up to the sound of magnus laughing. He takes a minute before opening his eyes to let himself wake up. He feels magnus hand running through his hair softly, for a minute   
its easy to pretend they are okay. He moves so that he is looking up at magnus, who was sitting up smiling 

“hello darling, we didn’t mean to wake you” his voice is a little lighter than it had been before. 

“we?” he is still half asleep, moving his hand to tangle with magnus. 

“I was just dropping off food” his dads voice bolts him awake, sitting up quickly as he searches for the voice. He finds him sitting in a chair beside the bed, casually talking to magnus as though alec wasn’t asleep in his lap. He can feel his face go red with embracement of his dad witnessing it. He can hear the people around him laughing “oh don’t hurt yourself” his dad says, waving a hand at him as though to say it doesn’t matter. Alec is still a little disoriented from the apparent deep sleep he had accidently fallen into. He sits back down beside magnus, looking around to try and find the time

“what time is it?” he asks, looking around the room trying to just move past the feeling of wanting to throw himself out the window. He loved the fact that he and his dad could talk about things, about magnus and his relationship but there were some lines that he just dident need to cross. Magnus leans his head against his shoulder, not caring about his dad at all it seems 

“5:50, I get to eat very soon” it really wasn’t that long at all. They had forgotten to weigh magnus when they got to the room and then alec accidently slept the whole afternoon away!

“did you go to the store?” he turns to ask his dad who is pointing to the bags on the floor

“yep, magnus also got on the scale about thirty minutes ago and hes good, turns out the world can go on if you let yourself take a break” they both nodded at him, apparently they may not need him as much as he thought they did

“he even bought me cake” alec looks at the bag and dose infact see a container that looks to be piled high full of icing but hes sure that there was some kind of cake in there somewhere. There was a restaurant down stairs where they could get a real actually meal that would help him gain back some strength, something that was not just sugar.

“that’s all that matters” he places a kiss in magnus hair before moving away, standing up to try and organize his life. They needed to go to weigh ins in five minutes. Why hadn’t someone woke him up? He briefly remembers over sleeping for jaces weigh ins and does not want to have a repeat. He throws magnus a hoodie as he gets out of bed himself, taking a minute once standing in order to stop wanting to throw up. Alec grabs a container of Pedialyte out of the bag along with a cup he found in the room. He would have to grab some ice but he could do that anytime. he goes through the bag and shockingly its filled with more then just junk food, he pockets a small container of grapes as well, thinking that magnus will like them later. He stands up and before he can say anything magnus has found his way into his arms, his hair crazy and soft, the hoodie that fits him just a little to big making him look nothing but adorable. He hears his dad walk out of the door quietly, choosing to give them a moment alone 

“are you ready for this?” alec asks gently, winding his arms around magnus waist to keep him in place against him, he cant help but realize how small he had gotten so quick. Magnus leans into him completely until his face was pressed against alecs chest.

“ive been ready for this since I ate my first salad” he pulls away with a weak smile on his face. alec was ready to stop seeing this defeated, starving version of magnus, was excited to see the spark back in his eyes.

They all go down to weigh ins together as though they are a united front that will somehow stop all the shots that were about to be fired at them. The nice thing was that the fight and weigh ins where both at the same place in the hotel so they didn’t have to travel. This was the first time that everyone on the card was going to be in the same room, were going to see them. He hadn’t seen a lot of these people since the last time he was here and knew there were bound to be people who didn’t agree with what he was doing

“lets make sure to put a weigh on the scale before magnus gets on it” his dad says from beside him. they find their seats among the masses as the rules meeting was before the weigh ins. Rules meetings were slow and boring, especially when you were waiting to weigh in. they sit close to the front as alec really dose want to hear what they had to say. It was under the Florida commissioner so he knew most of the rules, no elbows being the biggest one. A part of him knew that no matter what the rules where Al was not going to follow them. He lets his eyes roam over the room, he spots Sandra’s team and some faces he knows and then at last his eyes meet Jonathan who is already looking at him. there was something about him over this whole thing that he couldn’t put his finger on, he had helped them, had saved alecs life really and he didn’t know why. Was he trying to get in their head, make him think that they were friends and not enemies. Whatever it is, it makes alec drape an arm over magnus as though daring him to hurt him. instead of some official or ref Al stands up in front of the crowd 

“Lets get started shall we?” he walks over to take the rules sheet from the official who was supposed to be doing the speaking. “Thank you everyone for coming at such sort notice, things change quick in the fight world I guess” he looks at alec and magnus as he speaks as though having to have the rest of his team and people here was nothing more then an inconvenient. Alec knows if Al wasent so dramatic then he would have just put them in a ring together and had them fight to the death like gladiators but this was public, he wanted to destroy him on a very public level. He holds magnus a little tighter against him. 

“All of you have been here before so I’m not going to bore you with all the rules, basically all fights except the last with be fought full gear, and please don’t elbow each other because it wont end well for you” he looks at Jonathan who stands up and motions for magnus to do the same. He dose so slowly as though waiting for a shot. “these two, my best fighter against my estranged son are the main event, their fight will be a five round fight though I don’t think with these two it will go hardly that long” magnus sits down before Jonathan, not wanting to play into these games anymore then he has to. “there is going to be a press conference tomorrow at four, lets try not to start a riot this time okay boys?” its pointed at alec and magnus specifically and this time its not alec who looks like he is five seconds away from throwing a shot of his own its his dad. “tomorrow we will come by to your corners and give you rules more specific but im sure you all are dying to eat so lets get the weigh ins started” magnus grabs alec hand as Al walks over to them slowly 

“I see you left the family at home, pity I was looking forward to meeting them” magnus doesn’t respond to the words that make alecs blood run cold as he realizes the reality of their situation, instead he gets up and walks away leaving alec and his dad no choice but the follow him. they walk over to the mass of people signing in and choosing their music as the early fights got their weigh ins done. Since they were the last fight they would weigh in last. Alec pulls magnus to the side

“is there anyway Izzy and Jace are about to be pulled into this?” magnus looks down at the floor

“I fear they may be collateral; we do anything that doesn’t go with his plan and he goes after them” alec sees red for a split second when Al smiles at them from across the room. That was why magnus had acted so resigned, he knew all along who would be at risk if things don’t work out in Als favor

“you knew the whole time” alec says in his own disbelief, his mind already trying to think of a way out of this somehow that doesn’t include his family paying the price

“of course I knew, ive played his game before” magnus looks more then defeated and alec for the first time starts to feel nothing but the absolute hopelessness of this situation, all the plans and way outs he had been thinking of all now having a dead end 

“we have to call them, get them out of the gym” 

“he knows where they live Alec” he runs his mind trying to figure out what to do, the anxiety running its way up the back of his neck making his mind spin in a hundred directions.   
There were so many factors, so many things to think about that he dident even know what he was thinking anymore. A part of him wants to freak out, to yell about how they were supposed to be honest now, how could magnus not tell him that his family was in the front lines but he couldn’t. They were both doing what they needed to in order to get through his, he didn’t have the energy to fight anymore. 

“what if—my Aunt lives out of town, what if they went there” magnus face seems to light up with something other then defeat, maybe something like hope

“call them, call them right now and tell them to get into a car or a bus or whatever the hell they have to and get there, don’t tell anyone where they are going” alec moves away slightly to do as told, magnus ushering him out of the room completely “ill tell your dad” alec walks down the hall as fast as possible. Maybe if they could get his family somewhere safe, somewhere they cant be touched then maybe magnus would fight, maybe they had a chance if the only ones taking the hits were them. The second his is around the corner he has his phone in his hand

“I was just about to call you!” izzys voice booms from home. He can hear the fighters around her, she must be in the gym helping jace run it. He looks at the tome and knows that the only people in there were fighters. He hates that he suddenly doesn’t trust that any of them are for real 

“Izzy I need you to listen to me” he takes a deep breath as he hears her walk into a room “I need you to take jace and simon and I need you to go to Judy’s, you know where we used to go when we were younger? Dad is on the phone with her and I need you to go right now. Don’t tell anyone where you are going just go, the team will understand just please-please just go” he needs her to understand, needs her to grab them and leave before its to late. “I cant bring us all home unless you do this” the last words come out more honest then he had intended, his own mind not figuring out that conclusion till right now. They were what Al was holding over them, the reason for magnus just submitting to the fire. If they were safe then they could do something to change this, change their story. Izzy is silent for a few moments, all he hears is rustling on the side of the phone and then he hears jace speak 

“whats going on alec” he can hear jace and izzy both breathing, hes on speaker phone with the two of them 

“You are the last piece, the thing that is keeping magnus from fighting because he knows where you are, I need you both to get Simon and leave right now” 

“okay, whatever you two need us to do”

“don’t tell anyone, not Nik, not Clary, no one just lock the gym and leave” 

“okay, okay we are going” he can hear jace say something down stairs, yell at the fighters to kindly get out something has happened. He takes a deep breath knowing that they will be okay. 

“call me when you get there” he gives her some more instructions about what bus to get on since neither of them saw fit to get a license but soon she in hanging up and he is left with nothing but the silence. If felt like a weigh he hadn’t even known he was holding onto had been lifted off his shoulders, now the only thing he had to worry about were the people here. He walks back into the room with his head held a little higher

Turns out he had perfect timing because as soon as he entered the room the second to last fight was just doing their weigh in, magnus was starting to strip down to the pair of shorts he was wearing under his pants. His dad walks over to join them

“did they do it?” his dad asks subtly enough that it would be next to impossible to know what they were talking about if you didn’t know, he sees magnus hold still as though waiting for the shoe to drop 

“they did” a real smile falls onto magnus face for the first time in a long time. He moves closer and places a quick kiss to his check, alec surprised and not totally sure but takes it anyways 

“then maybe you were right, maybe its not over after all”   
Jonathan walks up to the front wearing a pair of shorts, Alecs dad stepping up to meet them 

“before my fighter steps on this I want to weight test it” he says the words to Al, him being the only person in the room who wasn’t afraid of him. alec knew that they had known each other back In the day, maybe a day when Al was not the monster he was now. 

“are you saying that you think its fixed?” Al fakes innocents beautifully but no one buys it, they all were thinking it

“im saying that I know you, and I want to weight test the scale before my boy gets on it” Al looks around him to see magnus, alec had moved slightly in front of him. 

“my son always did have a problem cutting weight, I guess playing house with you two didn’t fix it” the words are quiet and only made for the three of them to hear. He was a snake and he wasn’t afraid of the world knowing it “but as you wish old friend” he snapped his fingers and one of his fighters who alec didn’t know were running off to get a weigh he assumes when he comes back holding a twenty pound one. He places it on the scale only to have the weight come up as 20.2, closer then scales usually are. Even though it was right alec was glad they fought to do it, any act of rebellion was something. Jonathan gets on the scale first and alecs dad goes to fill the cup they brought with ice so that there was something waiting as soon as magnus had weighed in. 

“official weight; 135.0” of course he made weight, the only reason they moved the fight was because he was at weight and he was trying to humiliate magnus even more. Alec prayed to anything that magnus would be there to. He had worked so hard, let them have this one win. 

“take a deep breath, you got it” alec says trying to reassure him. he can almost hear magnus heart beating out of his chest or maybe it was his own. His dad stood by him just as nervous as magnus stepped on the scale. Alec didn’t breath, didn’t think any of them did 

“official weight:” he closed his eyes as though willing him to say the right answer “135.0”   
Yes. Alec wants to cry when he hears the weigh, yes, yes, they did it. He opens his eyes to see magnus smiling at the official who took his weight, his dads hand is on his shoulder

“thank god” his dad says, pulling alec into a hug because they did it. This felt more important then the actually fight, the fight to get to weight being more of a fight then hes sure will happen tomorrow but for now he would take it, he would take the victory of winning this small thing. They walk the two fighters over to a white wall and get them to do a face off photo, alec feels so many things that he wants to either pass out or cry or throw up because he did, magnus did it 

“good luck tomorrow gentlemen” the official says after the reporters take their photos of the two. Magnus is waking over to him with renewed energy on his face. he is wrapping his arms around alecs neck before he can say anything, alec holds him tightly. 

“you did it” the three words are simple but hold so much. He did it. He can feel magnus fingers dig into the fabric of his hoodie tightly 

“we did it” he says, moving away to look at him and alec hasn’t seen that much hope on his face in months. Soon his dad is moving in holding the cup of Pedialyte, his hand goes to magnus back 

“im proud kid” they all stand there for a moment, just enjoying the small victor that for a minute seemed impossible. That is until one of the reporters who had been taking photos of weigh ins walks over and takes a photo 

“what are you doing?” his dad asks defensively, moving to stand in front of them 

“these two are the talk of the fight world, and for them to both be here again as magnus fights against his own gym, its going to be huge” she is young, really just trying to do her job but alec still wants to scream at her

“I’m sure your a nice girl but my son is not a story, neither is magnus, so very kindly piss the fuck off” she walks away seeming to be more offended then she had the right to be. Rob hands magnus the cup and he looks at it as though its forbidden. It was a weird thing to eat after weighing In because you had spent so much time, and worked so hard that the idea of eating food again, of eating whatever you wanted seemed impossible 

“remember, little sips, don’t just down it please cause you will feel like shit” as hard as it was not to immediately drink four litters of water, you had to do it slowly. Other wise it could make you sick. It’s a weird feeling too, introducing water into your system after having stayed away so long, you could feel it spread through your body, you start to sweat, get hot, it was kinda horrible. Magnus dose as told, but after five minutes he is standing there drinking as much as he can get. Alec can see the color return to his face. it’s a beautiful sight. 

“I will never take this for granted again” magnus says, eating one of the grapes that alec had brought with them “oh my gosh we have smore goldfish and cake upstairs” there were suddenly just so many possibility’s in the world, it was easy to go crazy and make yourself sick

“slow down, first lets get some real food into you” they go down to the restaurant on the first floor, magnus talking again for the first time in forever. There was a hopeful tone to the three of them that really had no right to exist, but hey they got to eat. 

They take a seat, magnus immediately thankful for the baskets of bread on the table

“oh how I’ve missed you” he says before placing it in his mouth in the most dramatic way possible

“tonight, you need carbs, protein and more carbs” magnus ends up getting some streak and potato situation. it was important to get the right food in your system, not just the cake and bread magnus was wanting. You need to the protein that you had been depleted of, after the fight was the time to eat pizza and cake. 

Dinner that night was something that alec wishes could have lasted forever, something he wants to hold close to him forever because there was just a happy blanket over the three of them, for a moment nothing bad could happen. 

“when we get home the first thing I want to do is get a coffee from the place by our place, I have been dreaming about it for months” it makes something in his stomach turn at his words, the first time magnus had talked about the future more then the next few days. Alecs arm moves to fall around his shoulders, feeling drunk on the softness of the night 

“absolutely” it really was one of the best moment of the fight, the time after weigh ins because for that brief second you feel as though you can do anything, nothing is to big or to scary, it’s a moment of peace in the war that you never wanted to stop. 

“we don’t have to get going till late tomorrow so lets all sleep in for once, after we can grab some breakfast, sit by the pool, let’s just have a nice day alright guys?” his dad says. Alec is so caught up in the moment that he doesn’t stop to realize the words sound like a last day on earth speech

“sounds perfect” magnus says blissfully. They eat and finish dinner, all of them floating out of the room. Magnus now fed and hydrated. He would feel better tomorrow but alec knew he was feeling pretty good right now 

“send me a text when you guys are up and ready tomorrow” his dad pulls alec into a hug and then to everyone surprises pulls magnus into one too. Maybe his dad was more afraid then he let on. The elevator was empty when they got on, the rest of the hotel probably asleep or at the bar 

“im so glad you made weight” alec lets out, magnus moves in front of him the way he did earlier that day

“It would have been pretty bad if I didn’t I agree” he places his lips on alecs and for the first time there is nothing sad or desperate about it, no last goodbyes falling from his lips. 

Alec moves his hands to magnus waist, running one up his back. alec lets himself fall into, not on the verge of crying for once. He feels magnus bit down on his bottom lip, a move that makes alec forget his name. he pulls backs slightly, magnus chasing him

“as much as I love where this is going, we are In an elevator” his words are rushed against his lips, already not caring. His feels magus lips on his jaw, the spot on his neck. The rational side of him knows if someone walked in right now the headlines in the fight world are going to be “two top fighters making out on elevator” but god when magnus hands are running over his chest he doesn’t care. Thankfully the door opens and they stumble out of it, hands never leaving each other as they try to act like normal humans instead of love sick idiots, magnus leaving a kiss on his neck when he got tired of it. It’s a miracle they find their room really with how many times alec is pushed up against the wall and kissed. When they do finally get there, alec struggling to unlock the door they fall through the entry way, magnus lips meeting his and never pulling apart even as alec roughly closes the door. Alec kicks off his shoes, his hands never leaving magnus. He can feel him laughing against him as he struggles, mangus moving his hands under alecs shirt to run his hands over the exposed skin of his chest. Magnus moves and before he knows It alecs shirt is on the floor, alec moving to do the same because suddenly magnus is wearing just way to much clothing. Alec pulls away and just looks at him, suddenly feeling more things then he can say because mangus is his, and he is okay and is in his arms kissing his neck and alec wants to keep him like this forever, his mind screaming “I love you, don’t leave me, I wont let them take this, I love you” but he doesn’t say any of it, instead he pushes them onto the bed, the second magnus hit the mattress his own lips find there way to his neck, feeling magnus hand run through his hair 

“your it” he hears magnus say breathlessly. Alec moves to connect their lips again but magnus pulls away slightly “your my reason, my reason to fight, ” the words are to honest for the moment but alec holds them tight against his chest, magnus brings him in again. “id do it a thousand times for this” the words are a promise said against his lips, alec cant feel the cold medal of the ring against his check. Suddenly alec understood how people in the face of death and destruction could still be thankful for the life they lived, for the time that they got because he knew that no matter what the next day brought he would never regret a second like this, he would thank any god who listened for letting him feel this for even a second because the feeling of magnus lips on his neck, his shoulder, anywhere he could get to was something that would be imprinted into his mind forever. He loved him, he would do whatever it takes to save him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> he made weight!!! the moments after weigh ins really are magical, for that short time you feel as though nothing can hurt you because you did what felt impossible, its amazing!!! i hope you liked this chapter and leave kudos and comments if you did!!


	16. SIXTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hate to be another person who uses this quote but, we are in the endgame now guys!! this story seems to be coming to an end faster each day and i once again just wanted to thank all of you for the suport and hope you have enjoyed this as much as me!

the sun coming through the window woke him up the next morning and for a moment the bliss from the night before made him forget what the day meant. He opened his eyes only to see magnus beside him already looking back at him. he feels his hand run over his face gently, this is how he wanted to wake up every morning

“what time is it?” he asks quietly

“eleven” that wakes him up. 11? They only had four and a half hours before they had to be there. He had slept through half of their last day

“shit, how long have you been awake?” he places a kiss on his forehead, leaving his face close

“a while, you needed the sleep though” its only then that alec realizes magnus is fully dressed

“what have you been doing?” he pushes his face closer to his, still half asleep and wanting to be close 

“I went and got coffee with your dad, he wants to get food as soon as your up” magnus and his dad got coffee together? What a weird world they were living in these days. He moves away to get dressed, feeling bad for keeping them both waiting all morning

“you could have woken me up” a part of him wishes that he would have, wishes that he would have been up at the crack of dawn in order to spend as much time with magnus as he possibly could. Its not that he thought there was no hope, more that he didn’t want to leave anything left unsaid in case there wasn’t. 

“you’ve slept less than me through this whole thing” alec throws on a t-shit and a pair of jeans, running to the bathroom to finish getting ready. When he was magnus didn’t hesitate to pull him close. Magnus had clung onto him more then ever in the past few days, always close to him, it was something painful to see it but who was alec to deny him. 

“how are you doing?” he asked honestly, he knows magnus is more than terrified right now but doesn’t want to show it. To alecs surprise he lets his face drop for a second 

“im honestly more afraid then I think I’ve ever been in my life,” alecs arms around him tighten “but I’m ready, and I’m going to fight”

They walk down the stairs to meet his dad hand in hand and alec feels the same pit in his stomach as the first fight when he meant to meet his dad the day of his fight. His dad is seated almost in the same spot 

“morning boys” his dad says warmly, standing up to meet them

“morning” alec mirrors back

“well today is the day, no going back now” magnus gives him the strongest smile he can

“nothing can be as bad as the weight cut” it makes them all laugh as they make their way out the door. Alec knows that they are going to the same pancake place they did last time, no matter how sad the situation was some traditions would never change. Expect this time magnus was going to be part of it. 

“I don’t know what you normally do on fight day but we have tradition’s, the first one being pancakes” they walk into the place and sit down at a booth in the back, the location seeming all to familiar except this time its not fear of his dad hating him or of his own fight the next hours, this time It was pure fear for magnus. 

“I normally try to avoid my father as much as possible so pancakes seem great” he looks over the menu slowly as though its something strange to him. alec suddenly can’t wait to do all the mundane things he takes for granted because to magnus they are nothing but new.

“what looks good?” his dad asks magnus, the same way he always asked alec. He knew what his dad would get, what he himself would get because they had done this before, hundreds of times it felt like but thus time felt new, it felt like something new altogether. Magnus eyes are big but he has a smile on his face

“so many possibilities but I’m thinking whatever this strawberry situation is here looks like its calling my name” alec looks at where magnus Is pointing and sees the pile of pancakes   
with whip cream and strawberries and can already see himself eating it

“that looks amazing” alec comments, encouraging magnus to get whatever he wants

“im sure you have some crazy stories of alec, why don’t you share one” his dad says, This was like when your parents tell baby stories or bring out the photo album of baby photos

“or don’t, maybe don’t” oh god magnus had seen him so some stupid shit when he was younger, hiding in the dumpster was not even close to the craziest thing they had done

“did alec ever tell you about the time we stayed overnight in a Walmart?” his dad looks to him with wide eyes and alec is almost thankful of the story, as crazy as it was there were definitely worse ones he could have told. Like they time they got stuck in a closet (unironiclly) at Als gym because no one was supposed to be there, that was until Al walked in and they both thought they might die.

“I was not aware that you lived in a Walmart for a night no, please do tell” the waitress comes over to get their order, which was more lunch then anything else as magnus dives into the story 

“near the end of the night someone saw us and dear alexander over here became Spiderman and had to climb a shelve to hide” at this point in the story there were tears in their eyes from laughing and its exactly what this was for, a nice meal to get everyone’s minds off of fighting and the pressures that awaited them outside. 

“ how did I never know this” there were lots of things his dad didn’t know

“because at the time walking into the house and saying “I shouldn’t go to Walmart again because me and my boyfriend almost got thrown in jail by hiding out in a toilet paper shelve”   
was not something I could think about without wanting to throw myself out the window” his dad seems to think about his words for a moment before laughing

“that’s very fair” he loved how they could talk about this now

They all ate their meals in a happy silence, alec was right whatever magnus had gotten was amazing. 

“that reminds me, have you two put any thought into what you want to do for a wedding?” even the word wedding was enough to make his head spin for a moment. They had been so caught up in all the drama that they hadn’t even talking about it. Alec knew his dad was just trying to get their minds off of what was happening around them 

“we haven’t had a lot of time to talk about it actually” magnus says, happily leaning into alecs side “something small I think, intimate with people we actually like instead of a bunch of strangers” magnus words surprise him but alec couldn’t agree more. He wanted to do something personal, something that would mean something to them and the people they   
cared about

“me and your mom did something like that, your mom had always wanted to go to japan so instead of spending money on the wedding we flew there and got married with just the two of us, it was beautiful” his dad dident talk about his mom very much, it was like a secret that he did now

“that sounds beautiful” magnus says in wonder. He didn’t know anything about magnus family but he can imagine that it wasn’t like his. 

“somewhere tropical would be fun” alec says, thinking of the time he and his family went to Hawaii and did nothing but sat on the beach for two weeks, it was the best he has ever felt, somehow the troubles and stress of his own life were banned from the place. 

“sitting on a nice beach with palm trees in the distance in a place where no one knows our names sounds better than perfect” neither of them bring up the point that there are beaches and palm trees all around them, all of them knew this was not what he ment. Alec could see them standing on the beach with their families around them as they make promises to each other that alec knows he will keep for as long as he lives. 

“I agree” he looks at his watch and sees that they had been there for almost three hours, their plates long ago cleared away, magnus on his fourth cup of coffee, alec not far behind him. somehow, they had manages to spent most of the time talking about nothing and everything, the past and the future. They have just short of an hour before the storm is set to start and there was no better way that alec wanted to spend the day then with his family. 

“what is the plan for dinner later?” alec asks the group. He always found it helpful to make plans for after the fight, even if it was just a normal fight, it still helped him put some perspective on things

“pizza by the pool?” the same as last time. Alec thinks to how nice it felt to be sitting in the pool, magnus laughing and his dad smiling, he would take that over the nicest of dinner 

“and cake, lets not forget the cake” magnus adds in. yes magnus and the piece of cake that was sitting in the fridge waiting for him. maybe that was magnus light at the end of the tunnel, if he got through the fight, he got to finally have the piece of cake he had been waiting for 

“how could we forget the cake” his dad says and alec really feels like they area a family. He sighs, taking out his wallet and putting down some cash before magnus has the chance to

“you don’t have to” he says as the waitress comes and takes the payment, magnus pulling out his wallet to try and give Rob some money but he pushes him away 

“put the money away magnus, im not going to take it” magnus seems something like surprised but only nods, 

“thank you” he says softly but meaning every word

“of course” they get up and make their way back to the hotel, taking as much time as they can so that there day is full, sitting around in their room would be the worst possible thing they could do right now. They stop and take photos of the palm trees all around them like they are some teenagers just seeing the world for the first time. They stop and get some iced coffee drink that alec wants to insert directly into his veins. 

By the time they get to the hotel its nearly 3:30, they have just enough time to go grab their stuff from their rooms before they have to go to the press conference 

“ill meet you guys In the dressing room in ten minutes okay?” his dad says. No one says anything as they stand outside the hotel, all knowing that the fight started the second they walked in. 

“sounds great” magnus walks away sensing that alec wants a minute to talk to his dad.

“do you have the thing?” his dad asks quietly, alec nods his head

“its upstairs” 

they had the problem of magnus only wearing alecs gym hoodies because all of magnus gym wear was from his dads gym. As much as alec loved his name on magnus back every time they went to fights they all knew he needed something that was his, so his dad had ordered a jacket with magnus name, something that was his, something that he could wear to show who’s side he was on. He gives his dad a smile before walking away  
They really don’t have a lot of time before they have to be there, just enough for them to run upstairs and grab their things, for magnus to get changed into a pair of shorts and through on a hoodie. 

“I have something for you” alec says, walking over to his bag to pull out the hoodie that had been sitting there all day 

“funny cause I have something for you as well” alec wants to go first. 

“me first” he turns around to meet magnus who is sitting on the bed behind him. he hands him the bundle of clothes. Magnus turns it over in his hands. It was a little different than the rest of them, but so was magnus. Instead of the all black fabric of alecs the sleeves of this one were the same blue as the gym logo, in the style of a varsity jacket the body was black. It was much more magnus style then the other ones. Magnus looks at it, at the logo on the front “turn it around” magnus dose as instructed without saying a word, already knowing what the back is going to say. And there it is across the back. Magnus last name with the words fight team below it. He was a part of their gym, his own person. Magnus runs his fingers over the letters. he just looks at him as though he doesn’t quite know what to say for one of the only times in his life. “do you like it?” before he can say anything else magnus has thrown himself into his arms, wrapping his arms around his neck tightly

“thank you” he says, again and again and somehow the words mean more than anything. Alec cant understand how much this means to him, but it meant that he belonged, that he was a part of something, of someone who loved him without the pretext of cruelty. He pulls away and can see the tears welling in his eyes “its perfect” the smile on his face is so large that it feels like it could split his face in half with its purity. Joy falls over him at the idea that he could make magnus happy today of all days

“im glad you think so” magnus throws it on and it fits him like It was made for no one but him to wear and the sight of his logo on his sweater almost as great as seeing his own name, magnus wipes his eyes

“I’m not supposed to be crying today” he walks over to his bag and pulls out a envelope and alec already hates where this is going, he hands it to him and its like the rules of today   
are different then they are any other day, he wants to cry when the envelope has nothing written on it other than his name 

“magnus—” magnus kisses him to stop the words about to stumble from his lips 

“you know as much as me that tonight might not go the way we want it to, that it might—” he takes a deep breath “if something happens read this, it’s all the words ill never have the courage to say” alec shakes his head, not wanting to see it because it means all of this is real, the fight and the risks where real and not something they could dream away

“please” alec says, his hands going to the front of magnus jacket. They had been more emotional today than they had ever been but suddenly now that they had to go there seemed to be a thousand words he will never get the chance to say.

“im not giving up alexander, but remember that I love you” he places a kiss on his forehead, alec closes his eyes as though wanting to focuses on how it felt “now lets go kick some ass”

They walk down to their dressing room and all eyes are on them. This was the first event they had been to in the fight community as a couple, as a pair that everyone watched make out on live television. Everyone looked at them as they walked down the hallway filled with fighters, all of them judging or spitting words at them, other then the few who felt nothing but sympathy for the two of them. The room were they were supposed to wait in was smaller then last time but still large. This was not a normal fight, the amount of reporters out there who were wanting to get the first words from magnus or alec, who want to know what they are up to these days. It was better that they stay in place. The fights were to start at six, earlier than normal but it was something to do with the rules of the venue. It just meant that they were going to be able to eat sooner. They were met with rob sitting on the coach waiting for them. They walk in and drop their bags in the corner of the room, his dad getting up to meet them 

“nice jacket magnus” he comments, looking at the secret project that he had done as a surprise. Magnus pulled him into a hug 

“thank you, for everything” it was a sight to see magnus and his dad hugging like that, his dad gripping onto magnus jacket tightly as though afraid to let him go 

“of course, kid” he lets him go only to walk over to alec “alright you guys ready to do this?” someone would be out to show them to where the press was waiting, all of them planned on going in together as one unit 

“it cant be worse then the last time right?” they all laugh, remembering the last time they were in front of cameras and blew the minds of everyone involved

“yeah, lets just keep to the fight stuff this time alright”? alec had a feeling that this was going to be about anything other than the fight. Before they have time to make a plan a short girl with blond hair is knocking on the door telling them its time.

Turns out the room is closer then they thought, only a few doors down. Magnus grabs his hand before they are walk through the door

“we do this together” alec grips his hand before they open the doors.  
It’s a small room with about ten different reporters with their cameras, a table was set up in front of the rest of them where Jonathan was sitting waiting with Al standing behind him.   
magnus sits down at the other end of the table, alec and his dad on either side of him

“quite the entourage Bane” Jonathan says, looking at the two people who would take a bullet for him. why do all of these fights have personal attachment, what would these people think if they knew that magnus and Jonathan used to date and owned a cat, that Jonathan had been sent to take alec out and beat the shit out of him, that there were about a thousand moving parts that these people could never understand

“not my fault I’m just more likeable” the blond girl walks in front of them to explain the rules, before the first reporter stands up

“magnus this is your first fight since the incident, how does it feel to be up against your own gym?” magnus looks at Jonathan, then looks at alec behind him 

“well I think its safe to say that it’s not my gym anymore,” the people laugh a little at that “and let’s call it what it was shall we? My last fight had more moving pieces then your brains can possible comprehend” the reporter sits down, only for another one to stand up 

“for the record I have to ask, is there any relation between you and Jonathan, anything at all?” they had the power to blow their minds and get the fight shut down. Before magnus can answer Jonathan is sitting up straighter 

“we trained at the same gym for our whole lives, so of course there is some history, the three of us used to party together,” he looks to magnus “but if you’re talking about what happened last time then no, no we aren’t secretly sleeping together. Last I heard Dear magnus over there is engaged” alec had no idea why he wanted to talk about them, why he told him anything about any of them 

“so you do know each other?” the girl seems to ignore the engagement question thankfully 

“honey if you don’t think all of the fighters on any given card know each other than your mistaken, we all know each other” the reporter seems okay with that answer and sits down, the third one making their way to the spot light 

“magnus I think we are all dying to know, can you confirm that your engaged?” magnus just lifts up his hand dramatically, showing the world the ring 

“is this confirmation enough? And yes before you ask its to the man standing to my left, I know it’s a real surprise” alec knew magnus didn’t want to talk about them, he wanted to keep their personal life private and out of the world which Is probably why Jonathan had steered it that why 

“why did you decide to leave your family and start training at the new gym?” magnus looks at Al and Jonathan

“google the last time I fought, its evident why I stopped training with my estranged father” magnus grabbed alecs hand that was resting on his shoulder in protection “as to why I started training with a new gym, turns out family doesn’t always mean blood” Alec watches his dad place a hand on his shoulder 

“then why did you decide to take a fight against him?

“why are you standing here right now? Because a job is a job. This is no different” he sits back, leaning in to the people behind him in some act of rebellion. A boy with green hair stands up 

“do you think it will be hard to fight each other even though you used to be friends?” Jonathan looks at magnus with a smile because once again they are all playing a game that only they know the rules to

“ill take this one Bane. Just because once upon a time we were friends doesn’t mean we are now, I don’t think my main man over there will have one problem with punching me in the face”

“it’ll be my pleasure actually” magnus chimes in. alec never realized how similar Jonathan and magnus were, how similar they spoke and acted. It made sense sometimes how they got together as much as alec hates to admit it. 

“can you elaborate on that please?” the green haired man asked. Alec doesn’t really want them to elaborate actually because that would mean having to air their problems for the whole world once again. Magnus and Jonathan look at each other as though somehow they were having some secret conversation. He sees Al place his own hand on Jonathans   
shoulder but he ignores it

“should we tell them?” Jonathan asks although alec has a sinking feeling that hes already decided 

“you tell it best” magnus answers, holding alecs hand tighter 

“well ill keep it short. About five years ago, Its safe to say that I was involved in him and his now finance breaking up, I’m sure if given the chance Alec too would love the opportunity   
to get his own shot in” there was something about this, something about how Al is looking like he wants to kill them all. In some weird way magnus and Jonathan were teaming up together, both of them in some weird way know there’s nothing that Al can do to either of them until the fight 

“can alec confirm that?” alec just nods his head. This was no supposed to be about him 

“100%” it makes the crowd laugh again, all of them aware that they were not going to get any answers out of the two of them. The green haired guy sits down and someone takes his spot

“I just have a quick add on for alec, have you had any issues getting fights yourself?” alec doesn’t really want to answer any questions about him because this was about magus but magnus looks at him with a smile as though saying its okay if he wants to say no.

“my career is doing fine thank you” he says not wanting to tell the man that he would kill for any fight right now

“what was it like having to train Magnus for this?” alec thinks about telling them that they cant even imagin what its been like, that they all might witness a crime tonight instead of a fight but instead he looks down at magnus with a warm smile 

“it was awesome” magnus smiles back at him

“he’s only saying that cause he wasn’t the one having to run sprints all day” he hears the people around start to laugh. 

They go on like that, getting asked stupid questions that of course have no real answer to them but get the crowd talking. It feels like hours later when the last person stands up; a   
young women with brown hair, she looks familiar but he has no idea why 

“just one last question for the both of you, and it’s about the fight instead of your personal life” she looks around at the people who have asked the stupid questions “how are we supposed to trust the fight is real and not just some trick like the last time?” alec is pretty sure the last time they were here she asked them the same question. How funny would it be to tell her that its just as set up this time too. Jonathan is the first to move

“look at me. I’ve never had one bullshit fight in my life, now look at Bane over there, the guy had one messed up situation in his entire career. Look at the lightwoods standing behind them, both of them legends of their own. I guess there is no way to assure you that this Is for real but we shouldn’t have to, because I can promise that if any of you were put into the same situation as them that you would have done the same thing” Jonathan gives the three of them a smile. Alec suddenly sees the guy he used to know, the guy who would party with them and fall asleep on the couch in the middle of the night. 

“im almost touch by that Jonathan,” he turns to the lady who asked the question “no one is making you watch darling. If you think its not real then close your eyes” there was nothing else to be said about it, she sat down as the blond lady came back to the stage to escort them out.. alecs hand never leaving magnus. The second the got into the hallways magnus was leaning against him

“I hate those, they have no right to our lives” it was true, they did tend to think that they were only characters instead of real people who are living the lives they seem so determined to undermined

“well you only have to do one more” no one says the words if you win after the statement, instead they continue to walk down the hallway like they were all going to make it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the fight is coming!! i can't believe this is almost over!! i hope you guys liked this chapter and leave your predictions and comments, leave kudos if you enjoyed this, all the usual stuff!!


	17. SEVENTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the fight is upon us everyone!!! i hope you enjoy this!!

The second the first fight started it was on.

There were not many fights on this card, alec knows its because Al didn’t want to watch more than the main one. They had about an hour and a half before magnus would be called in to fight. An hour and a had left. He was out getting some water and towels and when he came back magnus was sitting backwards on the chair getting his hands wrapped by Rob. alec was as ready for this fight as he could be, Hes thought about it and thought about it for months but when he walks in to magnus sitting there looking like a fighter it’s as though he has never thought about it before. suddenly he is hit in the face with magnus sitting there looking like the fighter he is, getting his hands wrapped for what could be the final time and alec wants to scream because its not fair. He knows that people are dying and losing everything out in the big world and that in comparison his problems are not real problems but they sure feel world-ending none the less. He feels all the anxiety that he had been keeping away bubble to the surface faster then he can stomp it back, he himself finally realizing what they were preparing him to do. he couldn’t help but think of the Iliad, the book magnus had made him read while he was sick and cant help but think of Achilles strapping his armor onto Patroclus, unaware that by doing so he was sending him to die. He dropped his supplies on the table and walked over the bathroom, magnus cant see him break, not right now as he himself was trying to get himself ready for what was going to happen. He tries to calm his rapid breathing because he cant lose him, he cant, hes not ready for what is about to happen and there’s no world in which he ever would be. What would he do if something happened? He thinks of the letter magnus wrote sitting in their room waiting for him as though one day that’s going to be the only thing he has left of them. he doesn’t know when but at some point he had moved to the floor, letting his knees come close to his chest as though somehow that’s going to stop him from falling apart even more then he was. He takes a deep breath, the tears that wouldn’t stop falling down his face feeling like they were drowning him. he felt like a child, there were things to do and real things to deal with yet here he was crying over something he has known about for months. He hears someone knock on the door and wants to hide because he is stronger than his, he is more than this yet he cant seem to get off the floor.   
He cant stop them from coming in and kneeling in front of him. he doesn’t have to look up to know who it is. Magnus doesn’t say anything, only wraps his arms around him and lets him cry, have the moment he had been holding in. there is nothing neither of them can say that hasn’t already been said but that doesn’t change the feeling of drowning that fills him. he digs his hands into magnus back, feeling the fabric of his wraps on the skin of his neck. He cant breath, his panic unable to stop because he could lose this but he could lose him tonight.

“I need you to take a deep breath” magnus pulls away so that alec could see him, run his hands over his chest up to his face. hes still here, he is still sitting in front of him holding his face between his hands. “I’m still here love, your alright, just take a breath” alec felt like he was about to be left in the middle of the woods by himself without a light or anyway to get home. Alec follows magnus movement, taking deep breath after breath but the feeling in his chest doesn’t lessen. He falls forward, gripping onto magnus back like somehow, he could keep him there. His face stays tucked into his neck, breathing in the sent that is only his. Slowly his breathing dose slow down, the dizzy feeling in his head getting better but alec still doesn’t let go, he’s not sure that he’s ever going to be able to let go. Hes not sure how long they sit like that, neither of them saying much of anything, just holding onto each there as though they need it to breath. There had been so much uncertainly in the past months, they almost broke up in the middle of it and alec hated it. 

“we have to get you warmed up magnus” his dad says softly from the doorway, he can feel magnus nod against him but he doesn’t move. Alec thought he was going to be able to do this, thought he was going to be able to stand on the side lines and watch as magnus did this but he couldn’t, he can’t. Magnus moves back slowly, looking him in the eye. Alec looks down 

“sorry” he says, and he was. Magnus should be the one freaking out right now not him. magnus places a kiss on his nose

“don’t apologize, you get to fall apart sometimes too” his voice is something different then normal, something softer then it should be. Alec nods as magnus gets up, having to get rubbed down and ready.  
Alec takes a breath and stands up, his dad walking into the small room before he could exit. He puts a hand on alecs shoulder

“listen to everything I’m about to say carefully” alec wants to go home, be anywhere other then here because he knows that he should have held it together better then he did “you have every right to freak out a little bit, honestly we were both waiting for it to happen and now that it has you need to take a breath, go and say what you have to say to him and then I need you to get out.” Alec doesn’t understand the words coming from his dads mouth, they were supposed to do this together, there was no way alec was going to let magnus do this alone

“dad—” 

“listen to me. you have done everything you can to get him ready for this but you cant help him with this. As long as you are here the only thing, he is going to be thinking about is you, the only thing you are going to be thinking about is him and neither of you are going to be making the right calls. The first rule of fighting is to never let your emotions get involved son, id say your emotions are running this fight right now” alec wants to argue but the fighter part of him knows that his dad is right. “if he has any chance of winning this, you have to trust me alec. He needs to get his head in the game and he cant do that while you’re here protecting him” he doesn’t want to be away from him for even a second but they all knew the second he fell on the floor that he wasn’t going to be able to do this, was not going to be able to stand in the corner and watch magnus take shot after shot, watch him fall to the ground. It didn’t matter that he was a fighter himself, he didn’t want to admit it but the best thing for magnus was that alec wasn’t there. He nods his head slowly, his dad pulling him into a hug

“save him” alec says against his shoulder before stepping away. There was not much time left at all until the fight, maybe thirty minutes at most. He could do that. His dad nods before lifting up the bottom of his shirt, alec is more than surprised to see a gun. Its not like his dad was anti fire arms are anything, he had taken alec to learn how to shoot when he was younger but a fight was the not setting in which he ever thought they would have to have one. 

“trust me” he says. He takes a deep breath before walking past his dad to where magnus was leaning against the wall, his own face sad. 

“it would be a shame if neither of us got to watch Sandra’s guys fight” magnus says, ignoring what they are both thinking.

“it would be yeah” he knows magnus heard his dad. Alec grabs his phone from the counter and puts it in his pocket before walking towards the door. He turns back and magnus is in   
his arms before he can say anything, alec takes a moment to remember exactly how it felt to hold him. he pulls away before letting their lips come together in something like a prayer. He cant help the tear that falls. Magnus moves so that their foreheads are pressed together, breathing in the same air as though trying to stop the very movement of time

“I love you” Magnus says just above a whisper. Alec nods his head 

“Always” he moves away, needing to get it together before walking out the door. There were so many things to say, to do but he couldn’t say them in fear of it sounding like a final goodbye. instead he looks at the way magnus own tears fall down his face before letting him go. “ill see you back here after the fights” 

“you better, I plan on celebrating” alec takes a breath before walking out the door

He walks to the main room where the ring is set up, keeping his hood on as though trying to attracted the lest amount of attention he can to him. he spots Sandra along with her team all sitting in a row and walks over to them, taking his own seat next to Sandra herself. He looks at the fighters and sees the trophies they store on the ground 

“Congratulations guys, I’m sorry I missed it” he was glad that their fights were over, that none of them got hurt when alec knew it was a possibility that they all could have been. Brenna leans over, a smile on her face

“I can send you the videos if you want!” she was so young, standing on the brink of something alec thinks could be amazing

“that would be perfect” he sees the adults on the team give him a smile, all of them seeing how red his eyes are, that he is sitting here with them instead of with magnus. Sandra gives him a protective mom face

“Everything alright kid? Why aren’t you back there with him?” there was something about her that made it impossible to tell her anything but the absolute truth 

“he can’t get In the right mindset with me sitting there and frankly I can’t stand in his corner watching” she puts a hand on his arm 

“my husband used to be a fighter; I could never stand in his corner either” hes thankful for her. It was crazy to think that this was the lady he had watched his whole life on TV, on social media building her career and how she was sitting beside him telling him it would be okay. It was crazy how life worked out sometimes. 

They all turn to watch the last fight before the main event, although alec feels as though he wants to pass out 

“what did you do when he fought, how did you get through it?” its not like alec had never seen magnus fight before, he had seen him fight hundreds of times except this one was different. Sandra doesn’t take her eyes off the rings 

“I took a deep breath and thought about all the shit I have been through in the ring, all the horrible shots I’ve taken and remember that he has done the same, this is just like sparing expect more people are watching” except that it wasn’t. 

“there are more moving parts to this fight then you know” the words are quiet, not wanting anyone else to hear what he is saying. 

“I know kid, but at this point the only thing left to do is watch” he wants to throw up when the current fight ends, the ref declaring a winner. Its like someone has sped up the world, making the next ten minutes feel like mear seconds. But he can’t stop it, cant stop the lights from going down, can’t stop the announcer from walking to the middle of the ring and call out jonathans name for the world to hear. He feels Sandra grab his hand as he watches his old friend walk to the ring.

His music is loud but alec can’t understand it, his mind seeming to stop working like it should. Jonathan looks just as tired as they do, just as hopeless and alec realizes in the moment that he was going through the motions to, that no matter how much alec wanted to hate him, it must be hard for Jonathan to have to step in the ring with magnus, be at odds with Alec who at one point was the person he came to when his own dad had died. In another world they are all sitting in the crowd of this fight watching some poor guys get into the ring, in another world they were safe. He watches him open the ring and walk around it, getting himself used to the feeling of the canvas under his feet. Al stood in his corner like the grim reaper smiling down on them. alec knew what was next but somehow thought maybe It wouldn’t happen, yet magnus name was in the air and his music was blaring out over the audience. He clutched Sandra’s hand a little tighter as the audience gets the first glimpse of him. it was weird to think that to all the people around him he was nothing more then a fighter, someone they had seen in the ring a couple times here and there instead of a real human, someone who had a piece of cake sitting in the hotel room, who alec wanted to marry on a beach where the rest of the world couldn’t hurt them. no in this moment he was nothing more than Magnus Bane the fighter. He gets in the ring, walking around the same way Jonathan had done before. he watches his dad set himself up in his corner, placing the ice and things on the ground with the timmer. He watched magnus go back over to the corner, facing his dad the same way alec always did in the ring, he can basically hear his dads words to him, telling him to focus only on his words, only on what he is saying and not on what the rest of the world is. His dad is making him stay in the corner, not looking around at the rest of them. alec cant take his eyes off of him, the way the light shone on his face making him seem brighter then anything. It felt like seconds that they were each in their own corner before the ref brought them to the center. This was it. He couldn’t breath, already on the edge of his seat as they touched gloves. 

Jonathan threw the first punch and alec couldn’t breath. It felt like he was watching something on tv, there was no way that this could truly be happening right now. Magnus throws out a jab to test his distance, something that reflected alecs style more then Als. He threw a combo that ended with a body kick that alec saw made Jonathan flinch. With every punch that magnus landed alec breathed a little more, but every time that Jonathan made him move back, landed shots that shouldn’t have alec couldn’t help but think that it was over. Half way through the round jonathan throws a shot that lands perfectly against magnus body, a shoot that alec can basically himself feel and magnus stumbles back, jonathans uses it as a opportunity to throw any shot he can think of. Alec wants to turn away but he can’t, he feels Sandra’s hand on his reminding him to breath but it doesn’t work, he can barely register the other people in the room, the only thing he can see is the two boys fighting. He can’t even yell, his heart stuck in his throat. magnus ends up with his back presses against the ropes, one of the worst places he could be but doesn’t stop, instead he takes jonathan and throws him into clinch, landing knees of his own to his sides. He manages to throw himself out of clinch as the first round ends. Alec watches him walk to his corner and his dad sit in front of him, alec is almost glad that he wasn’t allowed to be over there.

“he’s doing good” Sandra says from beside him, he nods his head, unable to stop watching them or talk. Magnus made it, the first round was over which meant something really bad was going to happen In the next four. He took a deep breath, feeling his head get dizzy with anxiety “I heard that you guys got engaged, congratulations” she is trying to take his mind off of what’s happening right now. He turns to look at her and can see her own reaction to his face which he is sure is a mess “it will be a beautiful wedding, was it a dramatic proposal?” his mind is spinning but he uses her words to ground him in something 

“thank you—I,” he took a deep breath to calm his breathing “we actually were in the middle of a huge fight about this whole situation and somehow by the end of the day realized that we couldn’t do any of this by ourselves and ended up getting engaged” there is no weight behind the words but he appreciates the fact that she is trying. He hears the bell ring again signaling the next round.  
they go to the middle and touch gloves. magnus starts the next round strong, leading with a body kick and follows it with a straight hand. Jonathan doesn’t wait long in order to strike back. the round goes on like that, magnus throwing every shot he can think of in order to get through the round and Jonathan countering whatever he could. It was apparent They were pretty evenly matched. By the time the bell rings again alec can feel the sweat on his forehead. This was never supposed to go this long, they all thought that the fight was going to be over before the second but now they were about to go into the third and it felt wrong, everything about this felt wrong. Sandra doesn’t try to talk to him this time, her herself to focused on what’s happening in the ring. He watches magnus breathing heavy in the corner his leg looking bruised but otherwise okay, his dad looks hell bent on trying to find a way to win, his eyes dark with determination. He watches Jonathan being yelled at by Al most likely for not ending it when he should have. Alec didn’t understand what was happening. The third round starts and its like alec can feel it happen before it dose, the way his stomach twist into a giant knot as they touch gloves. Maybe its because its magnus in the ring but a part of him just has a horrible feeling that the bell wont ring again. Jonathan starts off strong, backing magnus up against the ropes again, alec cant breath when every shot lands better then the one before. he can feel Sandra grab him but he doesn’t feel it, all he can see is magnus with his back up against the rope taking shot after shot. Its at this point that alec realizes that he didn’t exactly know what he thought was going to happen, all he always thought was that something was going to, but now in the moment he had no idea what to think. 

“put your hands up kid!!!” Sandra screams from beside him, but then magnus is turning it around, spinning them out and suddenly alec has never been more thankful for the hours and hours of clinch they did in the last few months. Before he knows what’s happening magnus lands a knee that everyone can see lands perfectly, he follows it up with a right hand that hits him square in the jaw and its like the whole world starts to move in slow motion as he sees Jonathan stumble, magnus takes his chance and throws whatever he can muster until finally time stops and Jonathan is falling to the ground.

The crowd cheers around him, the ref running over to call the fight. Magnus just stands there looking at him on the ground, alecs dad watching it happen as though it can’t be real. 

This can be real. Alec doesn’t move or breath, it couldn’t be this easy, couldn’t just be another fight. He looks at jonathans corner and Al is gone, this was wrong, this was so very   
wrong. Jonathan is getting up and they are calling magnus the winner but when alecs eyes meet him there is nothing but fear.

“he did it” Sandra says beside him, already on her feet celebrating the moment but its like alecs mind is stuck. He did it. This fight that they had spent months stressing about, that they had lost sleep and fought over was over just like that and magnus was the one standing in the end. Could it be that easy? He slowly stands up, magnus face changing from fear to pure confusion as though he is just as surprised as everyone else. Could it really be over? They are ushering Magnus out of the ring, the crowed all getting up to leave at the same times since the fights were over. 

“he’s a good fighter, you both did well” Morgan says from beside Sandra, the rest of the team all giving him nods and smiles but alec just wants to see magnus. Its like his brain has not quite caught up with the world, there are no words in his mind, nothing because he can barely understand what’s going on. He wants to pass out when looks at the hundreds of people surrounding him, blocking his path. Could it really be over? Al would not have set the fight if he didn’t have a plan that Jonathan could win, if he didn’t have something up his sleeve, he suddenly realizes that Jonathan has been the wild card in this whole thing. Jonathan who had warned him, who had told magnus where he was and had told alec to run, could Jonathan be playing both sides? There were a thousand things running through his mind right now because there was no way this could be that easy, or maybe he didn’t want to let himself hope for a second that the universe could be taking mercy on him. 

“he won” he says, the words finally reaching his lips. Sandra puts a hand on his shoulder. He won 

“that’s right, he did” her smile is real as though she was getting ready to watch something, she would never be able to un see. A part of alec had been waiting for a knife, for something to come up during the fight that would end it but it never did, instead it went two and a half rounds and ended with a knock out, just like any other fight. He looks around but knows magnus and his dad aren’t there anymore, no they along with Jonathan and Al would be backstage talking to this person and that before heading back to their dressing rooms. 

“we did it—”

Every word he was about to say dies in his throat when the deafening ring of a gunshot pierces through the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and just like that its over, the big fight they have been horrified about is over just like that. this chapter (not the gun shot) was actually inspired by people who i train with, one of them was about to fight for a pretty big title and it was really intense and their partner was supposed to be the second in the corner (you can usually have two or three people in your corner) and before the fight they had a massive anxiety attack about having to watch them fight and it just shows that although these fighters are scary and get into the ring to punch people, alot of us cant deal with watching the people we love fight, i thought i was gonna pass out watching my best friend fight so its a real thing haha! i hope you guys all liked this chapter and are excited for the conclusion to this massive story, thank you so much for all your support over the year, leave comments and kudos if you liked this!!


	18. EIGHTTEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooo this is a fun chapter

The gunshot rings out over the room making alec’s blood run cold. The people around him start scrambling to get out of the room, people screaming this and that but the only thing he can think about is magnus and his dad. He turns to see Sandra standing in front of her team as though she could protect them, other than brenna who had suddenly attached herself to his arm. It felt like the world was all swirling in front of him, his chest unable to get air into it. Magnus and his dad where with Al. he feel the terror come over him like a blanket and he wants to run, push his way through the crowd of people to get to him, but before he can say anything a second gunshot rings out around them. no, no this is not happening. Brenna holds onto him tightly. He grabs her hands, not knowing what to say but knowing he needed to say something

“ I need you to be brave for me okay? I have to go find my family but I promise ill come find you after” she nods her head, Sandra grabbing her from behind. Alec looks at her “get them out of here now” she nods her head before pushing her way through the crowed. He can’t breath or think as he pushes his way through the crowd of people all crying out in fear, the only thing that mattered was magnus. His heart was in his throat as he tried to find them, not knowing where he was or where they were. This was the final play, they all knew it, Al had wanted magnus to lose in the ring and he didn’t, this was the only thing left to do. i

it was like he was on auto pilot, nothing sticking to the empty feeling in his chest. The crowd seems to become denser the farther away from the ring he gets. There were two shots, the image of his dad and magnus on the ground—no, no he couldn’t think like that without falling to the ground in despair. He can see a clearing of people up ahead, knowing that must be where they are because people are standing in a frozen state as though they don’t know what to do. he pushes them aside but they don’t move, he hears a inhuman sound rip through his lips at the lady who pushes him back, feeling more desperate then he ever had. When he finally gets to the empty space he doesn’t understand the scene around him. 

The first thing he sees is his dad sitting on the floor staring at nothing, alec wastes no time getting to him 

“are you hurt, what’s wrong?” he searches his dads face frantically but he doesn’t see pain, instead he refuses to meet his eyes

“I couldn’t hold him, I’m so sorry” he looks at alec with fear “I had Al, but he had a gun and I couldn’t hold him” he can barely think over the pounding fear in his chest. Al was gone, magnus was gone, Al could be anywhere. He had a gun 

“where did he go?” His dad points in the direction of a hallway and then looks over at the mass on the floor a few feet away 

“he saved him” alec looks in the direction, his heart leaping at the sight. He gets up and moves towards the group of people sitting on the ground next to something, or someone. His mind is screaming at him, its like every nightmare he had ever had was coming to life right before his eyes. He fights his way through the next crowd, needing to see what they are looking at more then he needed to breath. But it wasn’t magnus laying on the ground in a pile of blood, no instead it was Jonathan. His eyes meet alecs as he kneels down beside him. suddenly there is no history, no future, nothing except the person he had known since he was a child. He assess the wound in his mind, trying to run over how to save him, what to do but Jonathan puts a hand on his arm 

“im sorry” he says, his breath coming out short and rapid. alec sees that someone had already given him a shirt and pressure was being placed on the wound. 

“call an ambulance!” alec yells at anyone listening to him in his panic. He needs to find magnus, his mind spinning about the two shots, who did the last one hit? But jonathans hand is on his arm and he can’t get himself to leave until he knows someone is coming. Someone tells him that help is on the way and he takes a breath, looking at him “your going to be alright” Jonathan smiles

“of course I will,” he closes his eyes against the pain. “I’m sorry, about magnus about you, about all of it” alec thinks about the fact that Jonathan had saved both of them, the night he was sent to find alec walking home in the dark and dropped the knife, and the fight that he was supposed to win 

“you lost on purpose, you save him” alec says gently, trying to find the words to say. Maybe once this was all over, they would be able to sit down and talk about the past, but right now he needed a friend, needed someone to say they were there ,even if it was a lie 

“I couldn’t let Al hurt him, hurt you” there was a lot alec didn’t understand, things were going on behind the scenes that alec had not even thought about like the fact that maybe Jonathan was on their side, that maybe he took the fight because he knew it was the only way to make sure it ended the way he wanted it to. There were so many things to ask him   
“Im sorry” alec thinks of when they were kids and alec broke his arm falling off a swing. Jonathan had sat with him and talked about his favorite tv show at the doctors with his parents while they set his arm in place. Now it was the other way around. He wanted to stay but he needed to find magnus, needed to make sure. But why had Al shot Jonathan in the first place? Unless

“he wasn’t trying to shoot you” Jonathan shakes his head, a new sense of panic over coming alec “where is he?” anyone can hear the desperation in his voice at the words, please let him be okay. Jonathan nods his head to the right where the room splits off into different hallways. 

“tell him I’m sorry” no, Jonathan was going to be alright, he had to be alright because there was still so many things alec needed to tell him but he had to find magnus, had to find Al. he motions his dad over and makes him put pressure on the wound, keep his talking

"tell him yourself" he tells him because he would 

“be careful son” his dad says desperately, his own face frantic and wild but he is trying to stay calm. Its not alecs safety he is concerned about, he would take the bullet if given the chance. He gets up and starts moving in the direction they told him, not caring about the people he is pushing out of the way, who cares about any of them because magnus could be dying on the floor somewhere waiting for him to come help him. the image of that wont stop playing in his mind. 

He wants to scream when he gets to the end of the hallway and no one he cares about is there. Security had been quickly getting people out but there were still so many of them. he doesn’t know when he started running but soon he is running as fast as he can past the people he knows are sitting there watching him, all judging him, all of them knowing that he is trying to find magnus. There love story had been playing across all of their minds since they were in Florida last time, he refused to let them become nothing more then another tragedy. 

He runs until he reaches the dressing room, the only place he can think of to look. He walks in trying to catch his breath and it kills him to see how perfect the place is, to see magnus phone sitting on the counter still, the blankets still thrown around as though magnus had just used them. the room was like a snap shot of time forever unchanged before things turned upside down. He can feel the panic raise in him like water but he cant let it right now, he needs to find him. he doesn’t stop the tears that come to his eyes. What if he were to late, what if Al found him first. He helped him do this, helped him fight and be apart of this and now it was the end of them. he made himself take a breath and think. Before he could make a plan he heard the sound of footsteps. Maybe magnus had the same idea. He turns around, joy already filling him but he stops dead when instead of Magnus, Al is standing across the room with a smile, the gun pointed straight for him.

“its funny how things work out” alec stands frozen against the wall, trying to figure out what to do. Jonathan had warned him about this, about the fact that Al wanted him and not magnus.

“I wouldn’t say this is funny” he tries to keep his voice neutral, not letting the fear slip out of it.

“I don’t know, you and my son thought you had won some victory over me, thought you could beat me at my own game,” he brings the gun close to himself as though he is trying to admire It “only to end up here in the end” 

“why are you doing this to us?” it was a stupid question alec just needed to keep him talking, needed to make himself time that he doesn’t have right now

“I thought it was obvious” alec plays pretend although he didn’t know. He remembers what his dad had told him when he was younger. They had been watching some action movie and the bad guy decided to explain his entire plan before killing the hero, there for giving the hero time to escape, he had asked his dad why that happens and he had told him simply; that bad people want you to feel fear, want you to see how great they are and live in the moments where you think you are going to die, were a good man would shoot you on the spot. He knew which one Al was

“tell me” 

“for some reason my son cares for you more than anything else, more than even himself. the only way to punish him for what he has done to me is to take away the one thing he would die for. Its marvelous what people are willing to do when they are desperate” even though he knew that Al was going to say that, it was still shocking, still made him want to throw up at the fact people like him could even exist in the world. 

“then shoot me” it’s a challenge, but Al was arrogant and alec intended to use it. It’s a split second, a split second that Al looked away, the gun pointed at the floor as though he was surprised at Alecs words and alec uses it, takes the only chance he is going to get. He knocked them to the ground, using Als surprise to his advantage to knock the gun out of his hand, throwing it as far away as he possibly can. When he looks at Al under him he is smiling

“I can see why my son likes you” alec sees nothing but red, throwing everything he has into a punch because he knows he might only get one. Before it lands Al has moved, flipping them so that alec was on the ground, Al above him. the world erupts in pain as Al throws a punch, one that makes alecs head snap back like its nothing. He keeps his eyes open, using every bit of energy he has in order to move but Al is stronger, keeping him pinned to the ground, shot after shot landing “not even going to fight back?” alec puts the last of his energy into pushing him off, trying to ignore the pain in his head. He crawls away, getting to his feet. He watches Al take a knife out of his pocket. Of fucking course, he had a gun.   
For a minute it seems like he has entered a movie or a book, feeling as though he had seen this all happen before but to someone else. He wips the blood off of his face

“I thought you would punch harder” he says. they watch each other, this time alec throwing the first punch but it barely pushes him back, without him even knowing it Al had him   
backed up against a wall. He feels his back hit the solid surface, he looks around trying to find something to sue but there was nothing, nothing to throw, nowhere to go. He tries to throw a punch but Al just moves out of the way, instead choosing to throw a head shot that makes his head smash into the wall, making him fall to his knees in a moment of darkness. he throws one last shot to his face, one that made alec see nothing but black for a moment before he put the knife between them 

“it’s a pity that no one gets to watch you die” he runs the knife across alecs neck, making it feel like his skin was getting ripped off piece by piece. He can’t help the scream that escapes his lips. In normal times it would be fair to say someone would hear him but he knew the noise outside would cover it up, the crowd to caught up to hear his cries. He can barely think over his fear. He doesn’t want to die, not like this. 

“you don’t want to do this” he spits through his teeth; He can taste the blood in his mouth from biting his lip.

“oh, but I think I do” alec closes his eyes and thinks of him and magnus sitting on a white sandy beach, hearing the waves crashing against the shore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor alec, maybe jonathan is not such a bad guy after all, maybe he was just in a bad situation. the end is coming up real quick but i hope you all have liked this huge story and thank you again for reading it!!!! leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed


	19. NINETEEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys!! i ment to post this three days ago but i havent had WIFI at all so my bad!! i cant belive this is the end of this story which we have all been following for almost a year!! thank you so much for following and supporting this story, it means so much that you guys liked it, i cant belive that this is the last chapter (other then the epilogue) and just a warning this is a very shot chapter, but the epilogue will be better

“I don’t think that’s wise” 

alecs eyes snap open at the sound of Magnus voice in the room, he doesn’t know if its fear or relief that starts to fall down his face like tears. He can see the smile on Als face as he backs away from him slowly, alec looks to where his voice came from, holding onto it as though it could ground him in something real. magnus is standing in the door way with Als gun in his hand. the whole world moves in and out of focus but he can see magnus, can see him standing and whole, he was okay, he was okay. Alec brings his hand up to the cut on his neck, he knew it wasent deep enough to kill but it was deep enough to bleed, Al was trying to scare him. 

Al walks closer to Magnus but stops when he makes a move with the gun 

“ah yes, here to save the day as always” alec grabs for a shirt on the floor and holds it to the cuts watching the way magnus eyes moved to his, alecs shocked to see nothing but pure unadulterated fear. He nods his head as though to tell him that hes okay, that they were going to somehow get out of this. Al seems to notice with a sly smile “don’t worry, your boytoy over there will be fne” magnus eyes are stone when they turn on his dad who holds the knife tightly In his hand. Al takes a step forward

“don’t fucking move” Magnus says, his voice stronger then alec thought it would be be, he knows its just an act. 

“or what, you’ll shoot me? lets not forget who you are” he sees magnus waver, suddenly becoming nothing more then a child again “no matter how hard you try to change it you belong to me, you are going to let me do whatever I want” Al looks at alec with something horrible. “drop the gun msgnus, unless of course you want to hear pretty boy over here scream ” alec looks to magnus who’s eyes are glassy 

“don’t do it magnus” alec says as Al slowly starts walking over to him. this was their chance to end it, to once and for all truly end the cycle of abuse and dread, alec dident care what happen to him because magnus would be safe, really safe for the first time in his entire life 

“I said don’t move” magnus comes closer to him. Als smile never wavers 

“go on, shoot me, show him exactly how much like me you are” they all know Magnus wont do it, they can see it in the way his hands shake on the triger. 

“its okay” alec says as gentle as he possible could, knowing how scared magnus was “its okay”

“you were never strong enough to survive our game son” 

“he’s stronger then you will ever be” they all turn to see none other than Rob standing in the door way, the gun alec had seen earlier in his hand “move magnus” he says emotionless, magnus dose as instructed. This was getting bigger by the moment. Magnus stands behind Alecs dad and it’s the biggest show alec has ever seen of who’s side he is really on 

“Robert do we really need to go through his again, no one is going to shoot me—” the gun fires before anyone has a chance to breath or move.

“he may not be able to, but I sure as hell can” no one moves, just watch as Al fall to the ground, the smile still on his face. As soon as his head hits the floor its like someone pressed   
play on time and magnus is at Alecs side in a second. 

His hands run up his chest, one stopping at the cut on his neck and the other going to his face, alecs own hands going to magnus hands as though he is trying to prove to himself that he is real, that they are okay. Alec sees the tears falling down magnus face. he moves himself off the wall and soon magnus is falling into him, his arms gripping into this back fiercely, alec feels his whole body shaking in his arms

“I thought he—he almost—alexander” he pushes his face into alecs shoulder, neither of them able to fully understand what had happened in the last few minutes. Al was dead. He was laying on the floor in front of them covered in blood. Alec holds onto magnus tighter then he ever had and knew tighter then he ever would again because he was allowed to, 

they were okay.

“when the gun shot went off I thought—god I thought—” alecs own voice was frail and desperate, he grips onto him tighter, tears of his own falling down his face. magnus was okay, he was in his arms and he was okay, he was okay and he was holding onto alec as thought he was the only thing keeping him afloat 

“i love you” alec dident think that he was ever going to be able to let go of him again. He let his eyes close, letting himself take in the moment for what it was. They were okay. 

“im so sorry, I love you” they had gotten through the thing that alec hadn’t thought they would. Magnus moves back quickly, he brings a shaking hand to his neck. Alec takes his hand in his own, placing a kiss on his palm. “I’m okay, I’m alright” magnus shakes his head, letting his head fall against alecs chest. 

“im so sorry” his words are quiet and weak but they break alecs heart none the less

“I know this Is scary, but we need to go” his dad is standing beside them, his face white and eyes frantic. Alec nods his head, slowly standing up as well as he can. His neck really dose hurt. His dad has his arms around him faster than he can get his footing, holding him tight against his chest. Alec lets himself sink into his dads touch a little bit, feeling like a child, he feels one of his dads’ hands let him go, only for magnus to wrap his own arm around them. for a moment they all stand there holding each other, clinging onto the family they created. But soon his dad lets go of them both, magnus arms going around alecs waist as though he couldn’t breath if he was not touching him. alec wrapped an arm around his shoulders 

“you saved us” magnus words are no more than a whisper but rob shakes his head, putting a hand back on magnus shoulder 

“he was a cruel man magnus, he never stood a chance after he hurt my boys” 

There was a lot of stuff they still needed to work out, people they had to talk to. Magnus was going to have to deal with the death of his father whether he liked it or not but right now nothing mattered other than the fact that magnus was holding onto him as though he needed him to breath, he was alright. His dad was walking in front of him, still trying to protect him from the people all throwing questions at them as they walk down the hall and his family back home were safe. He knew this was far from over, they had hard times ahead of them, more difficult then either of them could understand but for now his family was safe, the ring around his finger a promise of the future he never thought he would be able to have, one that wasent promised but earned

“I love you” magnus says against his shoulder as though he cant say the words enough and he knows that there is nothing he wouldn’t give to have this, he would give up his career a thousand times and put everything on the line as long as it meant magnus got to kept saying those three little words like a prayer.

In the end, it turns out that Alec lightwood didn’t need to be the best fighter in New York city after

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Als dead! there are so many questions to be answered and i promise they will be! thank you again so much for reading and supporting this story, i hope you have all liked and enjoyed it as much as i have


	20. EPILOGUE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is it guys, thank you once again for supporting and reading this whole thing, i hope you have all enjoyed it

a year later.

Alec lightwood has stood head to head with people in the ring, has watched the love of his life fight something they all thought he would lose, has been beat up and cut but nothing was a terrifying as this

“are you ready?” his sister basically sung the words as she walked in the small room. He notices the beautiful blue dress her and alec had picked out last month makes her look like something out of a movie. He takes a breath before fixing his jacket. 

“what if he changes his mind?” his sister lets out a laugh at his words

“we both know that’s impossible, today is going to be perfect” 

After the events of Florida, a lot had to happen. Jonathan had been sent to the hospital but managed to make a full recovery and although his dad had been questioned by police for days along with everyone else in their family, in the end the amount of witnesses who saw Al shoot Jonathan made it pretty hard to fight that his death had been anything other then self defense.

He and magnus had gone through more than they could carry in the past year themselves, dealing with his father’s death, their destroyed careers and uncertain future. For the first time it was just them, no prefixes or threats looming around the next corner, no it was just them, able to be whoever they wanted to be. They both had demons they needed to fight and things to work out but they did it together, even when it felt impossible, they had made it through

“I never thought I would be able to do this” he says, looking out the window to the little beach where his family was waiting. Its true, if someone would have told him three years ago that he was about to marry none other than magnus bane on the beach surrounded by his family, he would have told you that you were crazy but there they were. His sister moves to stand in front of him, the ring on her own finger making something in his chest feel lighter. They both made it.

“the two of you have been through so much pain alec, no one deserves a happy ending more then you” he smiles at her, his nerves nothing in comparison to the joy and excitement living in his chest at the thought of what they were about to do. “come on, they are waiting for us” 

They had done exactly what they said they would that fateful day in the pancake house. He sees jace and his dad waiting for him in front of the officiant they had found, both of them smiling bigger then alec had seen in a while. It was a beautiful setting, the sun sitting on the edge of the water, the white sand falling under his feet. It was hard to believe that this was his life, that he was really about to do this because things like this simply didn’t happen in his world. 

His dad gives him a hug when they meet, alec swears he can already see jace trying not to cry. He looks out at the small group, Simon, nik, and clary standing on either side of him. they had decided they didn’t want to do a fancy wedding, all they wanted was something personal with the family they had chosen, the people who had stood by them. All of them looked at him with nothing but bliss. This is what he had been waiting his whole life for. Everyone turns as magnus walks towards them, Jonathan at his side. After he had recovered in the hospital they had all sat down and realized that they wanted to be in each other’s lives, that they had been wrong about a lot of things. alec had misses him more then he could say and jonathan had been ready to give up his life in order to save magnus, which really got rid of the bad blood of the past. 

Alec wanted to cry the second magnus eyes met his, the way the setting sun turned him to gold. His hair was longer now then it had been since they were younger and alec absolutely loved it. How was this who he got to spend the rest of his life with? Jonathan gave him a hug before stepping to stand beside Simon, magnus grabs alecs hand tightly

“hi” he said shyly, unable to look anywhere else

“hi yourself” magnus says and his voice is light with something that made him dizzy, something that alec had almost forgot could exist in it. The officiant starts speaking but alec can barely hear him over the sound of his own heart beating in his ears, the only thing keeping him on earth was magnus hand in his. 

“I’m of the understanding that they have their own vows” the man turns to alec, this was the part he had been stressing out about for months. Its not like he hasn’t thought about it, more so that he thought about it so much he couldn’t get himself to write anything down. There were no words to sum up what the man in front of him meant 

“we all know that I’m not very good at putting things into words so stay with me” the people around him laugh, including magnus “you and me haven’t had the easiest of relationships, especially recently. There have been fights, breakups, make ups and even the odd crimal master mind and gun fight. Things have gone wrong; we have both made more mistakes then we can count but there is no one I would rather make those mistakes with. Magnus, before you I never thought I could have this sort of thing, someone who I could run around Walmart with at three in the morning, someone who loved me even when I was impossible to love, someone i would love more then anything else. Before us, I was resigned to the idea that I would marry someone I thought my family would like but who I could never love. I thought that I was going to have to chose between being happy and my family” he looks to the people around him already crying and smiles. “but there you were making my sister laugh and dad smile at your dramatics, you fit into my life in a way no one else ever could and I cant imagine it without you” he takes a minute to contain the tears that threaten to fall “we stand here today to make promises to each other, but I think that you and me know more then anyone that the important things in life change and grow with us, so my first vow to you is that I vow to keep changing and growing with you every day, I vow to never leave you alone in the airport because the last time I did we ended up getting searched for five hours,” the group laughs 

“true story” magnus says, tears in his own eyes

“I vow to never make you eat the same salad every day for six months every again and to let you use my legs to warm up your feet at night. I promise to always read you books that I can barely understand but you love, I vow to be honest with you, to protect and support you, most importantly magnus I vow to love you, no matter how hard things get or how impossible they seem, every single day for the rest of our lives because what you give to me every day by just being you is something I hope to one day be worthy of” he can hear his sister crying beside him but he doesn’t take his eyes off of magnus, who is whipping away a tear of his own

“I don’t know what you were talking about alexander, that was perfectly worded” he watches as magnus takes a piece of paper out of his pocket and alecs promise not cry is broken when he realizes what piece of paper it is he is holding.

“I gave this to you that day, I suppose it was something to remember me by but thankfully you never had to read it. Id like to read it to you now” alec is already crying, the moment that night feeling like a life time ago let closer then ever. He grips his hand tighter “it reads; “dear alexander, if you are reading this it means that my father’s plan worked out the way he thought it would, but if you are reading this it must mean that you and your family are safe which is more than I could have hoped for” alec can’t imagine having had to sit and read this letter alone. “I’m sorry that I did this to us, that I made you help me with this even though the night I said yes to it you sat in my arms and told me how much you wanted me to say no, but still you never let me do it alone. You stayed with me through every part of it, even when we thought things were never going to be okay again you stood by me because this was what I wanted to do. but I never wanted it to end like this” magnus takes a breath to steady his breathing, his words make alec remember the life he was close to having, the life where this piece of paper would be the only thing left of them. “the day we decided to get married was the best and worst day of my life. On one side It was hard to believe that someone like you wanted to spend your life with me, especially after finding out exactly who I was, but there you were with your crazy hair and blue eyes telling me I was everything you wanted, it was the most amazing thing I have ever felt. But I also knew there was a big chance that I was never going to be able to stand across from you and say these things out loud, which if you are reading this means I was right,” alec might drown from the amount of tears falling from his eyes, the worlds all so real, all so true, magnus seems to be in no better shape but he keeps going “ if we would have gotten the chance to stand under the palm trees and give our lives to each other, I would have promised to always wake you up when you are stuck in your dreams, to hold you and tell you your okay when you feel like you can’t breath. I would have promised to always tell you the truth no matter how hard, to tell you every single day how beautiful and loved you are because I know you don’t believe it, I would have promised to hold your hand on air planes and to never again make you go on a two hundred foot swing ride. Your reading this which means I only have one regret, and its that I never got to tell you this in person. I know you are crying but if you get nothing else from this I want you to know that loving you was the best thing I ever did.” Magnus puts the piece of paper down, looking at alec who just couldn’t stop crying. He whips away a tear that falls and alec has to force himself not to fall into his arms at the pure emotions running threw his veins. “I wrote that a year ago when I didn’t believe I would ever get to say them out loud but in a amazing turn of events here we are. I want you to know that I mean every word as much now as I did then, even more so now because I know that there is nothing the world can throw at us that we can’t get through. You said that you hope to be someone worthy of me, but its me who plans to spend the rest of my life being someone worthy of you.” Magnus places a kiss on alecs hand, he can feel his tears fall. 

He knows that his entire family is crying right now, this being the most emotional thing he had ever heard. He loved the man in front of him more then he can say. 

“that was beautiful boys,” the officiant says, but alec doesn’t hear him, unable to focus on anything other then the man in front of him “its now that I ask if anyone has any objections or reasons as to why these two should not be married?” everyone looks at Jonathan who stands there with fauls offence

“never getting over this are we?” jonathan says with a smile, tears of his own in his eyes and alec cant help but thank any god he could for letting him have this life. 

“if not then I guess I have only one question left. Alexander, do you take magnus to be your lawfully wedded husband?” alec takes his mother’s ring and places it on magnus hand, they never did get new rings 

“I do”

“do you Magnus, take alexander to be your lawfully wedded husband?” magnus takes the ring and places it on alecs finger 

“I do”

“then I’m proud to now pronounce you married, you may kiss your husband” magnus pulls alec in swiftly, and their lips connect in a kiss that signals the beginning of the rest of their lives, a new life. The group around them cheers, he can hear his sister and jace crying, jonathan whistles approvingly. Alec and magnus turn to face their family who all look at them with stars in their eyes as though they didn’t believe this would ever happen either

“I love you” magnus says blissfully

“always” alec responds as they take the first steps into their happily ever after

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that's it. i can't believe this is the end but everything must come to an end at some point. i hope you have all enjoyed this and thank you again for reading this.  
>  until the next time guys


	21. NEW STORY

hey guys it's been a long time!!!! I am now posting a new story under the name "The story of you". it is set in our world and follows Magnus and alec through their lives, starting at 16 years old when they meet and ending once they have grown up. there is lots of drama and intrigue, but also they are just in love and happy too, please if you liked this story go check out the new one, I promise it is going to be worth the read!!!!


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